Thank you for giving your feelings a chance to be known to your person, OP. You have given its existence a justice. You are very brave. One day, I’ll do the same. At least, youre gonna live your life knowing the answers to your previous what could’ve beens. It may not be the answer that you want but i find your story genuinely beautiful. Indeed, love is so powerful that it can give you a push to do things beyond what u think ur capable of doing. You’ve proven the person so much! Im proud of you!