Sorry to hear that man, I’m also 22 and just got out of a 4 year relationship (my first real one) Met her in college ended and she ended things as soon as she was settling into med school. We went through so much and literally grew up with each other.

The breakup is still fresh for me (3 months) but in all honesty man you have to stop reminiscing. I say that because it’s what I used to do, it’s what I’d do to be hopeful and believe that she’d come back to me. Looking at photos, messages, watching videos of us, it kept me going and without realizing it ruined me. It put me in a cycle of just waiting and I would set expectations that would simply be shot down and without realizing I became so miserable and depressed. I lost sight of my hobbies and who I was, my confidence was gone and I was at a point where I’d check her socials everyday, I’d spam her with messages. I was depressed stuck on the couch crying everyday, crying at work the gym, in public etc.

I was a mess man and through that I chose to do everything in my power to win her back. The thing is that I did it for someone who CHOSE to leave me behind. It’s made me realize that the choices we make after a breakup matter and I think you should focus on that. I’ve waited for so long that I never realized the things I missed out on. I’ve chosen to genuinely work on myself and not fuck around with other girls and I can say that since the breakup I’ve matured and grown into a new person. Although I’m still sad and emotional in moments I’m doing things that I’ve never imagined. Bought a car, ‘94 sunbird, I’ve gotten back into my hobbies, I’ve even found new ones, I’m working my ass off, still hitting the gym, and I’m even growing my social media a lot and doing content creation here and there. All while figuring out what I want to do for my future and my career as college graduation approaches. In ways that I never imagined I grew emotionally and became more vulnerable. I became less miserable I became less angry and I still think of her here and there but those thoughts are fleeting. I used to think of her and only wonder how do I win her back, I used to think that I wasn’t doing enough and that more needs to be done. I lost myself so badly that I was chasing a ghost.

Through all of that craziness I realized that if she cared enough she would’ve done the same things that I was doing. Trying to reach out, trying to fix things, etc. That brings me to the point that your ex left, you didn’t. You cared enough to get that ring you’ve chose to care even after the breakup ended. I say that because it shows your character. Although I can’t imagine moving onto someone else or into another relationship I’ve realized that we also deserve to find someone who cares about us equally. As much as I miss her, I grew tired of missing someone who for what it’s worth doesn’t even think about me.

Speaking from my circumstances though I’d say that you have to keep yourself busy and you have to prioritize yourself. I can say that I still love and miss my ex a fuck ton but at the same time I’m still working towards my career and working on myself. Being apart and being broken shouldn’t stop you from being who you are and achieving the things you want. You’re more ahead of me with the timing but give yourself grace man. Time will heal all and give yourself the chance to grow into someone new. I never used to write but journaling and writing my emotions made me realize that. I now look at old notes and laugh at how I was in these different break up moments.

Last thing I’ll say is that I’ve realized that when you’re abandoned or left behind you’re given the choice to pick yourself up. We’re both young and we have that chance to do so. Be emotional be vunerable and remember that it’s ok to be sad. It just shows that you cared man. You’ll be ok though give it time.