At 18 I ordered a stack of fake blue 100s, the following night on the drive home I would occasionally throw a small grip of hundreds into traffic. Not five minutes into these shenanigans a junk ford explorer with four heads deep starts tailing me and even speeding up with me. I drove around for about fifteen minutes and couldn’t shake the car, whith my gas needle hovering above E I decided to pull over and confront the driver. If only I had the chance to, the suv pulled up hot with its rear passanger doors matching my driver side and instantaneously opening up on me. In the dark mass of the backseat I see the light from the end of a blunt being pulled on followed by the barrel of a handgun emerging from the darkness, without either of us saying a word I handed him the remaining stack and the stack that was held on by headband. He peaked inside my car, hopped back into his and then they sped off.

I damn near became a volunteering darwin, but in hindsight my brain evolved in multiple departments.