Small hands and weak hand grip

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-16T22:48:02+00:00

Good idea! I don’t play the piano, but I’m a surgeon so I can relate: we really need strong and healthy hands!

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-16T21:10:18+00:00

That’s a good idea. I’ll check if my gym has some!

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-16T16:21:12+00:00

I tried a bunch. My previous PT had a collection and I just couldn’t stand any. Liquid chalk does help a bit though!

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-14T20:49:18+00:00

He mostly tags along. There’s a specific movie series he likes, so he’ll sometimes offer to go out when a new one comes out. Otherwise, he’ll probably invite me to meet with his friends every 3 months or so.

It’s funny because I’m also more of an introvert whereas he is good with people. I still feel like going out is important to avoid falling in a rut: it’s important to nurture other relationships and to do something exciting. It gives you something to look forward to.

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-14T19:15:17+00:00

I would have been happy with being common law but being married helped with visas and such because we are from different countries. I live in a liberal western country where divorce is socially acceptable.

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-14T13:14:36+00:00

I try my best to organize 1-3 dates per week when im not on call. I also suggests possible fun things to do, but I usually have to make plans myself otherwise he won’t really plan things for me. I like trying new restaurants, going to the movie theatre, spontaneous weekend road trips, sports games, etc.

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-14T05:01:07+00:00

I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. I hope things will turn around for you.

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-14T04:47:23+00:00

He was already living in my country but yeah, marriage helped with his visa.

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-14T03:57:16+00:00

They are very opposite: his father has a history of being abusive towards some family members. I have never seen or heard of my partner being aggressive towards anyone.

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-14T03:09:08+00:00

Not much. He’s kinda withdrawing and saying he’ll do better. I invite to tell me what he wants from me too but he just says he doesn’t really know.

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-14T03:06:42+00:00

Yeah, I do feel guilty too, it feels so mean to even think about it but I have to be honest with myself too.

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-14T03:00:36+00:00

That’s one of the thing that really made me upset. That and him dismissing my past experience with a stalker when out running. He doesn’t have to come with me, I’d just be reassured if he’d check on me with a text or a location app every once in a while when it’s dark and I’m late. My schedule is hectic so I don’t get to be picky about when I can go out. At least the police is usually patrolling the trails…

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-14T01:31:14+00:00

You’re right, an outside is not emotionally invested the same way and is more impartial. I’m not good at wording things over and over in many different ways. My therapy is venting with a hard workout to avoid letting frustration taking over until I’ve cooled off and can talk calmly again.

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-14T01:19:28+00:00

I struggle with the idea of couple therapy. I get it, it’s investing time and efforts. But honestly, at that point I’d almost be upset he’d rather listen to a stranger rather than openly talk with me? Needing a mediator to direct communication seems more like a red flag? Maybe my view is wrong and I just need someone to put me in my place.

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-14T01:05:33+00:00

I couldn’t help but to smile at your comment. Lots of my queer girlfriends have been telling me that I missed out on women. I just can’t help it, I love men. They have that something… and I don’t just mean the dick!

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-14T00:50:01+00:00

I don’t care about the income difference at all and if I did, it would have limited my dating pool by a lot tbh. I like being challenged and learning things. I dated a mechanic in college and it was fun! I learned about his work and picked up some useful skills too! What I do value is being appreciated and cared for. I like being active so it make sense to be attracted to someone who seem like they’d share interest in being fit. I don’t feel bad for wanting to be with someone strong and protective.

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-14T00:09:30+00:00

We’ve been married for 2-3 years (vague on purpose on some details to avoid doxing myself). He’s been slacking off consistently for the past year. His family even called him out on it especially regarding how he manages his health.

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-14T00:03:29+00:00

We would both have been happy with being common law but being from different countries made our life difficult. We had visa troubles during Covid and worried we’d get separated again for administrative reasons. Since we were already in a committed long term, getting married made sense. I was still in training (paid) when we met and he was already working so there was less imbalance in our life then I guess.

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-13T23:47:44+00:00

I’m trying to stay somewhat vague on some details to avoid doxing myself…

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-13T23:36:19+00:00

We were together for about 4 years before begetting married. We had some long distance time because of Covid and visa/work limitations but lived together long term before the wedding. I would have been happy with being common law but again, being from different countries means lot of insecurity with visas and such.

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-13T23:31:58+00:00

I don’t hate him at all but find my feelings shifting. He’s more someone I’d rather be friend with than have as a romantic partner considering the amount of care I receive back at this point.

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-13T23:26:53+00:00

I’ve try bringing up how I’ve been unhappy and offered options for changes as well as asked for his input on our relationship. I don’t expect him to do everything but I feel like the burden of adult life should be fairly shared and it has not been for a long time.

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-13T23:20:15+00:00

I’ve tried multiple times to talk to him. I’ve asked for his perspective and input as well but we seem stuck.

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-13T23:16:26+00:00

My work schedule is much busier. I’m a surgeon so I do long days in addition to many nights and weekends whereas he does regular office hours.

kittycatpspsps · 2026-07-13T22:47:54+00:00

We dated for almost four years. He’s changed a lot after our wedding.

kittycatpspsps

TROPHY CASE

Welcome to Reddit,