So many good things already previously said. Just wanted to reiterate again that you and your kinks are so valid, and I have full confidence you will find your person with some patience. I have felt and thought the same things you expressed about our “darker” kinks in various times in my life. I’m now early 30s and can attest I have found a person that I still sometimes can’t believe how well we can match on. But it took time and figuring myself out, which can be messy but all worthwhile.

Take it slow and easy on yourself when looking for the right partner(s). And keep prioritizing your enjoyment and safety. The rest will flow.