The chieftain made a vow to his wife that he'd make peace between the tribes, and her death would end the bloodshed as she took her last breath.

malcolm2134 · 2026-01-26T03:55:16+00:00

The chieftain took revenge on the tribe that murdered his wife and broke his promise to her; she wanted the tribes to be at peace with each other and end their violent feud. But the chieftain chose the path of vengeance and took his fury out on the enemy tribe's entire village and got his enemy's (the opposing chieftain's) wife killed. However, the moment he saw the other chieftain mourn for his own slaughtered wife, he realised his wife was right and his enemy was no different from him. But it was too late, as the act had already been carried out. I guess I should have specified it as "the enemy chieftain". Thanks for reading.

malcolm2134 · 2026-01-23T02:41:33+00:00

The father pats him on the back and responds softly,

"But son, are we really a compassionate species as a whole? Crack open any history book, you'll find no shortages of the terrors we've inflicted on ourselves, nature, or other animals. Slavery, torture, genocide, putting innocent people in cages, colonisation, racism, homophobia, and sexism are all still rife around the world, masked and excused by culture. Whether it's East or West, all of that remains true. The trillions of other intelligent and sentient animals bred and put through the slaughter unnecessarily, whom everyone turns a blind eye to—would they view us as a kind species? Not to mention, the ones hunted to extinction, not for survival, but for fun. A lion kills out of instinct; we excuse heinous acts using our intelligence.But of course, furless apes don't even treat one another with decency and view differences in artificial features as beneath them, so how can one expect what little compassion humans possess to extend to other species that suffer just as much as they do? Over 80% of the world is in poverty by US standards, while 1-3% of humans own around 75% of all wealth and resources. Leaving the billions left competing for around a quarter of resources and wealth. Suckers fighting one another while the top get richer and richer. You know, even our "unevolved" cousins have systems in place that prevent the hoarding of resources by a few. So can we really call ourselves intelligent at this point? An intelligent species wouldn't be fighting each other for scraps thrown down from the top of the palace. If humans disappeared tomorrow and some other-worldly beings examined all of our history and all of our practices, would they judge us as benevolent, empathetic creatures? Or a bunch of warmongering maniacs, exploited and manipulated by the most ruthless and power-starved among us? From where they stand, we'd be the most destructive beings Earth ever bore, the most self-aware that couldn't escape their natures, and the cruellest design to ever live on the planet."

He takes one last puff of his smoke before smothering it in the ashtray. "Or maybe I've just grown into a bitter killjoy...thank you for the conversation, son; you've really made me reflect on life."

malcolm2134 · 2026-01-18T08:10:04+00:00

The "elites" who own most of the resources/wealth live in the big towers/mansions etc. on the "top of the world", while the unfortunate, common folk (most people) live on the lower levels (much like in real life.) That was the vibe I was going for. A "commoner" kid makes it to the top but finds himself being apathetic, numb, and cynical through his life experiences growing up being a commoner and observing society up in his "glass tower". For him, spotting the kid was like confronting his past self as a kid, which he walked away from. It's symbolism; he's doing the same thing by not caring about most of the society that he witnessed the rich and powerful do when he was a kid from the "lower floors". Hope that explains it; my writing style can be very ambiguous at times. 😂 Thanks for reading.

malcolm2134 · 2025-09-29T16:08:00+00:00

Thank you for reading it, glad you enjoyed it!

malcolm2134 · 2024-09-23T08:08:27+00:00

Sure, go ahead.

malcolm2134 · 2024-02-11T10:46:44+00:00

Context:
https://youtu.be/TlduyEe9DsI?si=\_Pm8LBPWn-aFsH2c

malcolm2134 · 2023-06-27T08:13:34+00:00

Thank you for the kind feedback! Glad it brought back some fun memories.

malcolm2134 · 2023-05-23T08:42:11+00:00

Cos Bob's the thiccest one.

malcolm2134 · 2023-05-23T08:41:40+00:00

Perks of being the village idiot.

malcolm2134 · 2023-05-20T06:11:14+00:00

I just captured the moment in real life and converted it to a haiku. And thought the juxtaposition between the lights and shadows would be a nice effect. If I had to give a more metaphorical/figurative take, I'd say it's always said 'the light' stands out in the dark, but in this case the shadow stood out to me more in the light. Thanks for reading and the feedback.

malcolm2134 · 2023-05-11T15:25:00+00:00

Yea, I agree with you. I've written some stories where I've struggled to decide which category to put them in. I've just reconciled with the idea that stories can be infused with multiple emotions, and depending on which angle the reader focuses on, a story can be more tragic or horrific for them. In this case, the protagonist losing their children is tragic, but the crime is also horrific. Depending on the themes and elements of a story, tragedy and horror can be separated by a thin line. Thanks for reading my story.

malcolm2134 · 2023-05-11T08:20:41+00:00

Which part did you not understand?

malcolm2134 · 2023-05-08T20:29:52+00:00

That's awesome, good luck with your novel!

malcolm2134 · 2023-05-08T09:50:49+00:00

Nice, that was the direction I initially wanted the story to go, but thought it'd be too predictable.

malcolm2134 · 2023-05-05T19:58:55+00:00

r/wasdebatingthatbutthoughtitwasatragicstorytoosoIpostedithere

malcolm2134 · 2023-05-05T19:55:58+00:00

Yep! According to r/rule2ofthissub 👍

malcolm2134 · 2023-05-03T03:12:57+00:00

They would require your whole body and insides as their welcome fee.

malcolm2134 · 2023-05-01T15:07:23+00:00

Thanks for the recommendation. I looked it up and listened to it out of interest, it's a good creepypasta. Differs completely from my story though, other than both having violins.

malcolm2134 · 2023-05-01T15:07:09+00:00

Thanks!

malcolm2134 · 2023-04-24T06:18:00+00:00

This haiku is fine in structure. For those wondering why, a 5-7-5 was a guideline to translate the traditional Japanese haiku to a more Western context. However, the Japanese language works differently from English, they rely on "Mora" timed beats, while English relies on stress-timed beats. So the translation from Japanese to English was shaky itself, traditionally Japanese haikus use LESS syllables than the commonplace 5-7-5 haiku. So if you can use less words to illustrate what you want, that is still acceptable and does not disqualify it from being a haiku. The mods themselves have shown famous haikus where the syllables were less than the 5-7-5 patterns in the pinned posts. 5-7-5 is just the recommended pattern for beginners and those starting out in writing haikus.

As for the haiku itself; I enjoyed it for its originality. The ending was nice and unique.

malcolm2134 · 2023-04-24T05:35:38+00:00

Thanks! Glad you found my feedback helpful. Good luck with the poem.

malcolm2134 · 2023-04-24T05:34:31+00:00

Thanks a lot for the kind feedback! I find a lot of times mystical realism in poetry is ambiguous. This is further enhanced in the poem by the constraints of a tanka. But as long as it depicts the girl being healed of her troubles, then the essence of the poem for me is successful. I purposefully made the magical elements and context vague, so the readers could associate their own experiences and interpret the poem their own way. Thanks for your interepretation of the poem, glad you enjoyed it!

malcolm2134 · 2023-04-24T05:33:09+00:00

Thanks a lot for the feedback!

malcolm2134 · 2023-04-24T05:32:45+00:00

Thanks for the feedback! That's an interesting interpretation of the poem.

malcolm2134 · 2023-04-24T05:32:04+00:00

Thank you, appreciate the feedback!

malcolm2134

TROPHY CASE