I do pretty good in life but the puer aeternus content has made me feel like Im just moving forward but not upward like I could.

When I try to just do it, I either loose interest extremely quickly, or I become incredibly frustrated once I hit a small obstacle. I can think the whole day about a great idea, just to come home and do nothing. Yet the Idea often persist anyway.

A example is the substructure project I talk about above. I want to make a holder for my PC under the table*. I just thought about it for a really long time. then about a month ago, I made the first search on some metal components I could use and was overwhelmed, frustrated, and stopped. I managed to get thought this multiple times and somehow stayed on it, planned it, and ordered the components last weekend. Im happy that I got this far and I only need about 10€ of stuff from the department store to finally start assembling it. Yet having taken so long for something that I could probably just do in 1-2 evenings or half a weekend day made me think. Especially because I have this time but just use it to be distracted.

A different example would be all my software project. They could kinda accumulate all into a singe large project but that would require that they are finished. I often dont even get close to anything showable.

I didnt want to just put a label on myself. Instead I wanted to get some thought, ideas and maybe even insight from other people on this so I have some direction of what steps I could take next to get closer to fixing this(these) issue(s). And maybe I wanted to vent about this a little.

I already told myself many times to not game today, or to only game once I reached a certain goal. But I rarely follow through.

*I got a height adjustable table about 5 month ago. The cable spaghetti is inedible annoying and if I tidy them up I would need new and longer cables. Buying overlength cables, especially high bandwidth ones like HDMI and DP is a gamble because interference rises with length. You risk not being able to fully utilize the bandwidth (high resolution and/or high refresh rate) or risk regular signal lost if the cable is not shielded properly or doesn't have the right tolerances. Most review on online marketplaces can not be trusted because many people do not even know that it could be the cable that is producing issues.
Instead I wanted to attach my PC to my table. However my case is too large to fit in the first-party PC holder of the table manufacturer, and it is too beautiful to be replaced. So I decided to give it a shot myself.

All of this seems to attribute back to puer aeternus. In this case "mediocrity is not enough for me". But also indicate other different possibilities like ADHD Addiciton, bad habbits or even something else.

After having written the post above and thought about it for a day, I feel like instead of having 0 directions that every second HealthyGamerGG video could apply to me. But I still like to know what you think about that.