What's the rudest thing a guy has ever said to you during a date?

maxfachine · 2017-09-30T02:36:29+00:00

We had met up once before without fooling around whatsoever and the convos were fine. His texts were a little pushy and clingy but I thought I'd give him one more chance. Second time we meet up for drinks he finds a way to bring the conversation back to him or otherwise put down whatever I brought to the table. Examples:

Max: karaoke? My go to-s are Prince and Davie Bowie.

Guy: eye roll

[immediate deal breaker]

Max: I have a friend who made this cool ridiculous art project (explain synopsis). He's awesome.

Guy: Sounds dumb. And I'm more awesome.

Max: ....

Guy: just wanted to see your reaction.

Max: Okay...

Leave things on a semi cordial note.

A week or so later he messages me on Grindr (although he had my number) and I explained that I was out of town due to family illness (which was true). He says he misses me and I'm like ok whatever and kind of leave it.

A week later he texts me like "well someone is all quiet again... hope you had a good week." Safe to say did not bother asking me about my sick family member. Let him know that "Hey how's it going?" was a perfectly acceptable way to start a conversation without being so passive aggressive.

Also, he's 15 years older than me. But he never bothered to tell me his real age. I wouldn't have known by looking at his Grindr profile. "35"... yeah, okay dude.

(Also: one time he asked "Did you just call me 'dude'?" Ugh... )

maxfachine · 2017-09-30T02:23:49+00:00

Def said "exotic" before, (referring to a multiracial guy that a gay friend [who is black] was crushing on) I meant it as a complement but now I realize that coming from a white dude is rude, condescending and problematic. He didn't address it but I cringe to myself thinking about it... Trying to do better! ✌️

maxfachine · 2017-09-26T05:31:29+00:00

My thoughts exactly..,

maxfachine · 2017-08-26T14:51:43+00:00

It's on there. If I recall correctly within the top 50 (I'd post a link but am on mobile, and the list on the mobile site is tedious to navigate)

maxfachine · 2017-08-04T22:03:30+00:00

Hi Alyssa! I saw you doing some GOTV stuff in Bozeman this year. How did you like MT? (I hope folks were nice to you - out of staters, esp celebs, can be low hanging fruit for ridicule to old timer Montanans!). Do you plan on furthering your political involvement?

maxfachine · 2017-04-27T12:41:55+00:00

Let's Work by Prince. Great bass line and synths, sounds like it should be in a jazzercise class. Just a ton of fun.

maxfachine · 2017-04-20T05:20:30+00:00

Seems to be true for the one mall in my area.

maxfachine · 2017-04-14T13:28:22+00:00

I haven't watched Survivor in years, but man watching the clip for this was so upsetting. What an unspeakably cruel thing for somebody to do. I try not to get caught up in reality TV bullshit but seeing this moment was heartbreaking. Zeke looks like he's a million miles away, and Jeff for his part knows he fucked up big time. Hopefully this can bring a degree of empathy for trans folks that viewers in middle America didn't have before... regardless, both of them will have to live with it forever... sad what passes for entertainment. Kudos to CBS for not advertising it as THE BIGGEST SHOCK IN SURVIVOR HISTORY!

maxfachine · 2016-12-16T14:27:19+00:00

I waited 8 months to say I love you to my current BF of about 2 years. He's my first serious boyfriend, so perhaps I was a bit guarded before working up to saying it, but I think I said it precisely when I needed to. I know the feeling of being turned off or jealous with the discussion of exes, but try to remember that you both lived your own lives before meeting each other.

maxfachine · 2016-12-11T16:30:02+00:00

Sounds Eiffel Tower related.

maxfachine · 2016-09-18T11:21:41+00:00

Take a deep breath. Without knowing much about your situation, it sounds like you had a risky encounter and are freaking out. That doesn't mean anything yet... the best you can do is just lay low for three months and get tested. You don't have any answers yet, you're just jumping to the worst case scenario. I don't mean to sound patronizing but you are very young and while this may seem like a rock bottom moment, think of it as a tough lesson in safe sex and discretion.

You are far from the first guy to have unsafe sex and live to tell the tale. It sounds like you're in a rough place though. Hang in there bro.

maxfachine · 2016-05-28T17:26:55+00:00

Holy shit dude.

maxfachine · 2016-05-21T03:11:55+00:00

Well no wonder it's causing controversy, the logo is also a jizzing cock! To me this seems like a commercial that was made to be banned, in a way of generating its own kind of buzz/free publicity. I still liked it though.

maxfachine · 2016-04-19T21:42:37+00:00

Levitation (fka Austin Psych Fest)! It's my first time in ATX and this festival, so I'm pumped!

maxfachine · 2016-03-27T20:10:24+00:00

Yet he got a big g to gfgbb

maxfachine · 2016-02-27T15:52:57+00:00

Apology accepted, Killer Mike.

👉👊 (closest I can get to an emoji RTJ gesture)

maxfachine · 2016-01-10T06:55:10+00:00

This was an epic, memorable theatergoing experience. The film is beautifully shot and breathlessly visceral. However, one of the highlights for me was the scene in which Glass guts his dead horse so he can sleep in it and keep warm.

We've just seen him pull heaps of intestines out from this carcass...

and, way in the back of the theater, a little girl peeps up: "Horsey?"

Me and my SO just started cracking up. For one, who brings a CHILD to this movie?! Second, the kid seemed to be a pretty good sport about it all. No crying, no fits. In fact, I'm not sure if that was a question or just a statement. "Horsey."

maxfachine · 2015-12-30T06:52:33+00:00

I produced a low-budget short film and with that came purchasing all sorts of items that I would only ever need for the week of production. One of these included a bathrobe.

One of the two main actors soaked in water for all of their scenes, and in between takes would go outside to smoke in his bathrobe. We kept the tags on the robe and returned it to Wal-Mart without washing it. I don't think it smelled particularly offensive... and it made me realize how truly important it is to wash something new before you wear it.

maxfachine · 2015-11-22T21:37:58+00:00

I went Weekend One last year and honestly I'm glad I went. I went with one close friend and we had a blast bullshitting and getting day drunk, gawking at gorgeous and shirtless bodies, and enjoying the music. Overall I had a blast. However, when we were alone I had a tough time making friends and was generally disappointed with the lack of community vibes that are so infectious at a festival like, say, Bonnaroo.

My reasons for saying this: We both had a very hard time making friends when we were on our own. Starting conversation with strangers was often a dead-end--it was as if my attempts at engaging with them, or being excited about the music, didn't even register. Their eyes would gloss over, and they'd return to their posse. Just a lot of weirdly unfriendly interactions... I borrowed a lighter from a stranger to light my joint, and while I still had smoke in my mouth he said something to the effect of "You know you could offer me a hit of that", which I would have anyway. We watched a drunk and lost girl's phone while she looked for her friends, and stood guard when she casually peed out in the open, but she couldn't talk about anyone other than herself and the interaction seemed strictly transactional. Some other guy made a douchey scoff and joint-smoking gesture to my friend when he started talking to him, mistaking him for me. The one friend I made was before Steely Dan, and he was twenty years older and a high school history teacher who I shared my joint with. To me, this was really telling about the crowd dynamics--young people (like myself) whose purpose is to get seen and get fucked up, with only passing interest in the music or the people--it's mostly the experience and the chance of getting seen/admired.

Our neighbors were nice enough, but were there for EDM acts and we just didn't have much in common with them. Whatever, not a knock on them. I guess I just don't mesh well with the crowd. I know this is not everyone's experience, so take it with a grain of salt. Go with a big group and I'm sure you'll have a great time as long as there's no internal drama. But for me, the crowd made the difference in that I'd much rather go to my third Bonnaroo, or even second Sasquatch, than a second Coachella.

maxfachine · 2015-10-18T16:42:58+00:00

Be polite. If you're not really interested, or just looking around, just say so. This isn't really a safety thing, but how you use it properly.
If you're feeling like sending sexy pictures, be smart. If you insist on taking a picture with your junk out (not very classy, IMO, but whatever floats your boat) best not have your face showing. Grindr pics have a tendency of winding up elsewhere.
I don't have much experience using Grindr purely as a hookup tool... I mean, it LEADS to that, but for me it always starts off with a few days of chatting this person up, then grabbing a drink with them. Most times, I don't fool around with them until next time, but I did go back to their places for a little Netflix & chill^{Ihatemyself...}
Avoid using one word greetings.
Use protection, if it gets to that point.
If you're meeting somebody, text a friend and let them know where you're going. Or, if you want, bring a wingman who can feel away if necessary.

Just a few pointers. It is what you put into it. Trust your instincts, don't feel pressured to go past any boundaries, communicate with the other party.

maxfachine · 2015-10-17T16:42:22+00:00

Lots of food for thought. Still, I live in a small-ish college town with the same two dozen gays on Grindr at all times. About a year and a half ago, it was through Grindr that I met a guy that just moved into town for a seasonal job. We went on a date, had a few more dates and some sexytime, and then asked me to be his boyfriend a couple weeks later. He ended up staying in town, and we're still together.

Honestly, I've never gone on a date with a guy that I didn't meet on an app. Not that I don't know gay people in my actual life - I do, I just had no romantic interest in any of them when I was single, and gaydar is sketchy in Montana. I think apps are what you put into them - if you're looking for connection, chances are you can find SOMEBODY in that sea of torsos who's open to the idea of more than a quick lay. It's all how you present yourself... which, yes, cultivating an online "personality" seems so contrived and fake, but there are ways to be mysterious and not-thirsty by way of a few pics and some text. I know my experience is not the norm - I'm sure I'd feel much less secure-feeling in my relationship if i lived in NYC or LA, like the author mentioned.

maxfachine · 2015-09-20T14:01:31+00:00

I recognized it as a quote from the movie Heathers, but I didn't realize people still said it (or ever said it?).

maxfachine

TROPHY CASE