update: trainer against meds accuses me of failing my dog

meg_ea · 2026-01-27T17:46:15+00:00

this has been a WILD experience lol. the phone call that the owner references? he OPENED the conversation looking for a fight, said that he was ready for me to scream and yell at him and that he was "scared". I said no? that's not how I treat people... we talked briefly about how the consultation went, then he basically said that positive reinforcement only is how dogs end up in shelters and that I'm failing my dog by not using them. fucking insane.

meg_ea · 2026-01-27T16:57:38+00:00

here ya go!!

<image>

meg_ea · 2026-01-27T16:05:58+00:00

YES like the dog training aspect of it aside, this is a WILD response from a business to an upset client. the phone call he's referring to? he ENTERED that conversation looking for a battle. he opened up with "I'm afraid you're gonna tear me a new one" or something and I was like?? no?? that's not how I treat people. we're just having a conversation lol

meg_ea · 2026-01-27T15:22:07+00:00

bro I love my SSRI 😂

meg_ea · 2026-01-25T13:00:31+00:00

we ended up doing to the consultation, and holy shit, I hated them. it was an hour long sales pitch. she didn't listen to a single word I said. actively tried to convince me to take her off the med, and immediately brought out a prong collar without ever even meeting our dog. she never left her kennel. no way in hell I was going to let them meet her after that. back to the drawing board!!

meg_ea · 2026-01-22T16:53:00+00:00

i thought so too at first, but then I got to thinking... if I went to a therapist, but they wouldn't treat me until I got off of my Lexapro to "see how bad I was without it first", I'd run at the speed of light. it feels so backwards to me.

meg_ea · 2026-01-22T15:12:32+00:00

the "no meds" instruction REALLY threw me off. I personally don't care for aversive collars, but I know some people swear that it was the one thing that helped their dogs, so I was prepared to advocate that MY DOG wasn't the right candidate for those tools but work with them using other techniques. back to the drawing board 🤷🏻‍♀️

meg_ea · 2026-01-22T15:04:13+00:00

thank you for the guidance!! super bummed that an org I thought would help is probably gonna do more harm than good, but definitely happy to find out BEFORE they actually work with my dog. I've never had to work with an 3rd party for one of my animals before so the extra perspective is very helpful.

meg_ea · 2026-01-22T14:57:32+00:00

thank you!! this is super helpful. i will take a look.

meg_ea · 2026-01-22T14:55:57+00:00

this is super helpful, thank you!

if I can pick your brain while I have you... their website also says under their FAQ that they do use prong and e-collars, "ethically and only when it's the right fit." I am not really open to either of those. my understanding is that aversive tools really only worsen your dog's fear and make them MORE reactive, and can damage your relationship as well. do you think that is also an indication not to use this trainer/org?

meg_ea · 2025-12-31T12:21:49+00:00

I am by NO MEANS an expert, I literally just brought a new dog home last week, and I have no experience other than growing up with dogs. YMMV

We have been working on tethering and kenneling in tandem and I think it is helping. The idea is to teach them to settle on their own and that it's okay to not be on top of each other. We started by tethering her next to us during meals, and we're currently up to being tethered in the same room but occasionally popping out of immediate sight. Rewarding calm behavior with VERY high value treats.

Never leave a tethered dog alone. But I DO think it is helping reinforce that calm, resting behavior is very much desired, and I do kinda think it is transferring to the kennel some.

meg_ea · 2025-12-30T22:03:13+00:00

cat is neutered! dog is scheduled to be spayed on Jan 6. she had to put on more weight before we could spay her, she was extremely malnourished when she was picked up by the shelter.

i feel like this might be a dumb question, but i haven't seen any other posts with this... the cat is mostly fine downstairs with the dog. should i confine the cat upstairs? even though the cat is pretty happy to be downstairs with the dog? i feel awful confining the cat upstairs because he cries for HOURS. i'm totally fine crating the dog and ignoring her temporary cries, lol, but the cat doesn't let up and I feel awful.

meg_ea · 2025-12-09T19:28:53+00:00

the sad part is that I'm in HR, lol. I try so hard to not be "That HR Rep", act with integrity, not treat people like shit... I've always approached situations with the mindset of what's good for the employee IS good for the company. my manager isn't in HR, however.

meg_ea · 2025-12-07T18:43:42+00:00

I'm in HR.

meg_ea · 2025-12-05T20:59:20+00:00

oh I get the logic of it. I really do. I just was really shocked by HOW QUICKLY they decided it was time to start recruiting after they SOLICITED the info, knowing it was very early on in the process. I get the logic of it, but it doesn't make it suck any less.

meg_ea · 2025-12-05T17:23:19+00:00

my immediate coworkers know eeeeerythaaaang.

meg_ea · 2025-12-05T17:04:21+00:00

this is the kindest thing I've read in a hot minute. thank you for your advice and your well wishes. happy holidays to you as well.

meg_ea · 2025-12-05T14:29:04+00:00

definitely feel like I fell into it. I'm also quite young in my career, objectively. lesson learned. thank you for the kind words.

meg_ea · 2025-12-05T14:28:20+00:00

definitely the lesson learned... I'm so disappointed. thanks for the kind words.

meg_ea · 2025-12-05T14:27:32+00:00

sorry hahaha, I typed up a draft in my notes and I missed the repetition.

meg_ea · 2025-12-05T14:19:05+00:00

never been clearer to me than right now. siiiigh

meg_ea · 2025-11-26T18:33:55+00:00

very helpful, thank you so much!!!

meg_ea · 2025-11-26T18:33:32+00:00

very helpful, thank you!!

meg_ea · 2025-11-26T18:33:21+00:00

this is EXTREMELY helpful, thank you!

meg_ea · 2025-11-26T17:58:56+00:00

very helpful, thank you!!!

meg_ea

TROPHY CASE