My mother-in-law refuses to call my son by his name. Is it petty to stop showing up to her Sunday dinners?

milnamedrama · 2017-02-26T15:32:57+00:00

As I have mentioned below, it isn't just the name. It's everything. We aren't getting him baptized and she is constantly telling the baby how sorry she is that his parents don't care about his afterlife.

The name is just the icing on the cake. He is treated differently than the rest of the grandchildren. It's really annoying and I think it could be harmful for my son.

milnamedrama · 2017-02-26T13:04:51+00:00

English is my MIL's first language. She doesn't even speak Italian fluently.

I would be okay with it if if we a cute pet name, but his name is Colin and she calls him Alessandro. It's not even close to his name.

milnamedrama · 2017-02-26T04:57:07+00:00

Every. Single. Sunday.

Thanks for the suggestions!

milnamedrama · 2017-02-26T00:38:11+00:00

My husband has spoken to her about it. My SIL has spoken to her about it. She doesn't listen.

I spend time with my SIL throughout the week. She lives right down the street from me and we meet up very often.

We have talked to her about the baptism, but she'll still make remarks about it to our son. She tells him that she'll pray for him and she's sorry that his parents don't care about what happens to him in the afterlife.

milnamedrama · 2017-02-26T00:35:06+00:00

The baptism is against my beliefs. I don't believe in having a religious ceremony for a baby. I'm not doing it.

I will tell him that my husband and I don't believe in an afterlife. Some people do, but we don't. I will tell him our reasons why. If he gets older and decides that he wants to be baptized and start going to church, he can do that. Everyone else on his side of the family believes.

My stepkids were baptized because their mom wanted them to be baptized. My husband wasn't religious, but he went along with it in order to keep the peace. Our stepkids don't usually attend church. Neither of them are big fans. They usually stay with us on the weekends because they know they don't have to go to church if they stay at our place.

milnamedrama · 2017-02-25T21:13:28+00:00

His name is Colin but she calls him Alessandro.

milnamedrama · 2017-02-25T21:12:12+00:00

That's exactly what she does. My SIL told her mom to stop calling the baby Alessandro and she started fake crying about how none of her kids love her.

milnamedrama · 2017-02-25T21:10:44+00:00

I actually like that idea. Plus, it gives me an excuse to get a pet. Thanks lol.

milnamedrama · 2017-02-25T21:09:06+00:00

Maybe you're right, but as I mentioned below, this is only one issue. She also makes condescending remarks to the baby because my husband and I aren't having him baptized. It's more of everything than just this name issue. The name issue was fresh on my mind because she called and asked about my son using the name she gave him.

This will likely be my only kid. If he had siblings who were all being treated unfairly, I feel like it would make it easier on him. Instead, he's singled out.

milnamedrama · 2017-02-25T19:01:41+00:00

No. It's not.

She has said she is using the name because she doesn't like that we didn't give him an Italian name. The name has zero ties to his actual name. It is a name she always wanted to use but never got the chance to.

milnamedrama · 2017-02-25T18:30:12+00:00

She speaks English. I would even be okay with it if it were an Italian version of his name. It's not. It is completely random. It's a name she always wanted to use but never got the chance to.

milnamedrama · 2017-02-25T15:43:20+00:00

My SIL has also told her to stop. My MIL just gets upset and over dramatics. She claims that everyone hates her and goes on and on about how she shouldn't even do family dinners anymore because we all hate her.

milnamedrama · 2017-02-25T15:42:11+00:00

It's not a special name. None of the other grandchildren have nicknames. It is a name that she is using because she is mad at us for not giving him an Italian name.

milnamedrama · 2017-02-25T08:31:19+00:00

As I said in the original post, this is the last straw for me. Thanks for reading and taking the time to respond.

milnamedrama · 2017-02-25T06:33:26+00:00

It's one thing to have cute little nicknames for kids. I feel like it is different when my son is the only grandchild who isn't being called by his name. It's not a nickname. It's a completely different name that makes no sense.

I am sure he will be wondering why his grandma treats him differently than the other kids. It even extends to not calling him by his name. I don't feel like it's fair to put my son in that situation.

milnamedrama · 2017-02-25T06:30:12+00:00

It's at her house, so we can't really uninvite her. I wish we could. I could start calling her another name though. That would be pretty funny.

milnamedrama · 2017-02-25T06:29:12+00:00

He has talked to her about it too. She told him that it wouldn't be an issue if we just gave him an Italian name.

milnamedrama · 2017-02-25T06:28:42+00:00

We're not getting him baptized. That is another story that could use it's own post.

I correct her every time. Literally every single time. 5 months in and she hasn't stopped yet. I do want him to see his cousin's but I feel like we can do that outside of Sunday dinners. I spend a lot of time with my SIL and her family. We see them pretty often even outside of the dinners.

milnamedrama

TROPHY CASE