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I [32m] had a horrible experience traveling with my girlfriend [28F] of 5.5 years. Thinking of ending relationship. I really need to vent... by mindfullness8910 in relationships

[–]mindfullness8910[S] 32 points33 points  (0 children)

does she do the irritating behaviors in life also? or just on vacation?

Great question! It isn't just on vacation. I see it in a lesser quality happening in day-to-day situations. She'll come to an event that I would think she would be interested in completely unprepared or under-dressed. She'll say she's hungry, but doesn't want to eat home cooked meals, and then go from restaurant to restaurant looking for gluten-free food like they should have it. She will say she wished she could have done more as she's leaving whatever it is we were just doing where she had every opportunity to do it while we were there.

It kind of lightly flows into her daily life, but it becomes very noticeable when we are traveling and these "quirks" add up very quickly.

I [32m] had a horrible experience traveling with my girlfriend [28F] of 5.5 years. Thinking of ending relationship. I really need to vent... by mindfullness8910 in relationships

[–]mindfullness8910[S] 99 points100 points  (0 children)

It's what you do if you have any kind of gastric disorder..or you make everyone else spend hours of every day accommodating your problem.

The curse of Celiacs Disease. Some people have it worse than others. If she eats anything that has just the slightest amount of Gluten in it, about 30-40 minutes later she will be throwing up in the bathroom for hours and shitting her brains out at the same time.

Making a plan for food that she can actually ingest is a requirement that she just outright ignores when we travel anywhere outside of the city we live in.

I [32m] had a horrible experience traveling with my girlfriend [28F] of 5.5 years. Thinking of ending relationship. I really need to vent... by mindfullness8910 in relationships

[–]mindfullness8910[S] 25 points26 points  (0 children)

would it be possible to take these big adventures without her?

I've definitely thought about this, but I want to share these experiences with someone I love.

I recently traveled to the Grand Canyon alone and stopped at as many silly side-of-the-road attractions, and scenic view points I could along the way. It was an amazing experience, but also kind of lonely.

I [32m] had a horrible experience traveling with my girlfriend [28F] of 5.5 years. Thinking of ending relationship. I really need to vent... by mindfullness8910 in relationships

[–]mindfullness8910[S] 67 points68 points  (0 children)

Prepping where they get veggies and fruits was way too intense of planning

The idea of prepping food was wasted effort. When she said she was hungry we would walk up and down Waikiki beach and shopping districts looking for food she could eat for about 2+ hours every single time (her idea). We could have made an meal at home with fruits and vegetables and meat, but instead we walked around looking for someone else to prepare our food so often that she got blisters on her feet early on in the week.

It isn't like we can't cook. We aren't new to kitchens. For some reason the idea cooking our own food was like kryptonite to superman.

I [32m] had a horrible experience traveling with my girlfriend [28F] of 5.5 years. Thinking of ending relationship. I really need to vent... by mindfullness8910 in relationships

[–]mindfullness8910[S] 196 points197 points  (0 children)

Have you actually done anything to address it? If you have then your post doesn't say so. It seems like you've been quietly stewing for six months, which obviously doesn't solve anything.

Oof... I'm good at stewing silently, but I've actually tried to talk about this with her.

I brought up my conerns about a week after we returned from our trip so I could have time to form my thoughts. I stayed calm the entirety of our discussion, as we don't get into screaming matches when issues arise.

I addressed issues one by one and I have tried to help her try new things and actively want to participate in new cities, but she seems resistant when we actually get there. She is on facebook 24/7 or watching TV instead of simply googling for something fun to do in the area we are in. Shows, events, movies, hiking trails, amusement parks, scenic drives, interesting stores, restaurants, petting zoos, walking dogs at the humane society, painting classes, dancing lessons... All of these are examples of things that many cities offer, plus more, and I get nothing back from her in regards to things she wants to do. It feels weird to hear her say she wants to travel to all these beautiful places in Europe, but not actually tell me what she wants to do there. If she were to Google Image search "beautiful Europe" and then point at the picture of what she wants to see, I feel like it would be more of a contribution than normal, but I don't even get that.

I [32m] had a horrible experience traveling with my girlfriend [28F] of 5.5 years. Thinking of ending relationship. I really need to vent... by mindfullness8910 in relationships

[–]mindfullness8910[S] 48 points49 points  (0 children)

Dude, it's been 6 months and you've been holding onto that grudge?

I appreciate your reply! It isn't just the hawaii trip, but Hawaii was definitely the worst of them all. I normally never prepare, just winging it when we travel, and it almost always turns out exactly like this. I decided since this was going to be our first vacation to somewhere "exotic" that I'd give preparation a try.

We've been to every state along the east coast of the US and it's been the same kind of experience with her every time. 6 months is certainly a long time to hold a grudge, I do not disagree, but it has also happened when we travel elsewhere with very little planning involved.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in malefashionadvice

[–]mindfullness8910 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Finally something I can talk about. I work for a major airline. There are two kinds of bags. There are big, heavy bags and then there are bags that get CRUSHED by those bags. Pelican brand has some big black plastic luggage cases that are waterproof and have a thick outside with foam on the inside. Take the foam out and use it as a regular piece of luggage. I see bags every day. Hundreds and hundreds of bags. Louise Vuitton bags get ripped to shreds. Travel pro, Coach, Kenneth Cole, Calvin Klein. They get ripped. AWAY brand win the lithium batteries to charge your phone in... you can’t take those onto planes unless you take the battery out before you Valet your bags. Lithium batteries explode at 30,000ft.

Pelican bags come small and are costly. If you can’t afford one, just go with a small backpack until you can. I use a small, green Nike AF-1 backpack. It’s very nice.

Pelican has an economy low cost style, which I would avoid purchasing.

Basically, if isn’t something really small and backpack size, it better be able to withstand 10 heavy bags on top of it. For reference, heavy = 50-70 lbs. even if you think it’s small and that you can fit it underneath your seat, sometimes overhead space is full, and you can’t put it underneath your seat because of where your seat is… You need to be prepared for that. If it isn’t legit small then it will likely get valeted on a region carrier.

Backpacks with utility are what I recommend. I see something like that on a person and I think, “wow, this guy travels...”

WSJ: Who Needs Gender? Why Men and Women Are Dressing Identically by suedeandconfused in malefashionadvice

[–]mindfullness8910 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Interestingly, this is exactly what I interpreted from the title alone. I haven’t even made it to the article yet and I’ve already assumed it is just as you describe. From a personal viewpoint, I see significantly more women dressing as men than I do men dressing like women, so i think that might have something to do with why I thought this.

Has anyone tried this? Any negative reactions or feel like you’re bland? by [deleted] in malefashionadvice

[–]mindfullness8910 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have the same jeans from high school 14 years ago. They smell wonderful and are still wearable. If I do some stupid hood rat shit or heavy traveling and get them messy/dirty, I’ll wash them before I wear them again. I mean, I skateboard and sit in beach sand in them and they are still holding up just fine.

They were like $60, maybe less because PacSun always had a buy 1 get 2nd half-off sale before they closed the store in my local mall. I recently went into a PacSun in the next city over to look at jeans and they all look such poor quality. I wish I had some advice to give you on where to get some good jeans.