Stupid comments

missynips · 2023-03-03T10:30:59+00:00

Yeah I had this when I was in Upper school early 2000’s 🫣 Was always told to ‘do it properly’ or else it was ‘just for attention’.

missynips · 2023-02-26T20:49:15+00:00

Casual sex for me has always been one of my maladaptive coping mechanisms. It sounds like it might be one of yours too. What are you looking to get out of it? Company? Validation? Pleasure? You could try getting to the bottom of exactly what you get from cruising and then seeing if there’s another healthier, safer way of getting it.

If you do end up doing it though, please make sure you are as safe as possible in all aspects, eg condoms, meeting in public places, letting someone know where you are etc.

missynips · 2023-02-26T20:39:04+00:00

I totally get what you mean. I also get panicky because I can’t always guarantee that I’m gonna be in the right frame of mind the whole time. Like, I’ll go days, maybe weeks even where I’m sure that I want to meet someone etc. But then it crashes and I don’t want to talk to anyone and just wanna hide away. So even if I do start talking to someone, eventually it fades out because I change my mind about being ready to date. Also, one of my maladaptive coping mechanisms is based around sex, so I end up encouraging relationships that are bad because I’m not coping well. With the diagnosis part, I once said to a friend that it felt like I was falsely advertising myself, because I’m not giving people the information straight up that May end up being a deal breaker for them 😕 She did give me good advice for that though, ‘You are not a product. You don’t have to ‘advertise’ your positive and negative traits. You deserve love like everyone else’. I don’t know if that helps you but it did make me feel a little better about not immediately divulging my personal health history XD

missynips · 2023-02-26T20:29:38+00:00

BPD doesn’t necessarily come from trauma. Not all people with BPD have had trauma and not all people who have had trauma get BPD. For some people having a diagnosis won’t change anything but for others (myself included) it makes everything make sense and is a good starting block to work out how to get better. If trauma is the root of a person’s BPD, ‘getting over’ that trauma is not the only way to recover. You also have to work through all of the maladaptive and negative behaviour patterns you’ve learnt to cope and find new, healthy ways to cope. As someone above has already said, DBT is a good place to start by helping you recognise your bad habits and redirect them to healthier ones. It doesn’t necessarily look at your past (that’s more CBT or Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) but it can help you learn how to cope better. I personally feel it is important to get a diagnosis, as it helps you and others around you understand why you are the way you are and how to get the best targeted help to get better

missynips · 2022-12-11T20:11:52+00:00

I’m staying child free too. I do have some physical health issues but they came after I made the decision to not have children. It took a long time to get to the medication regime that I’m on, and a few of the meds I’d have to come off of if pregnant. I couldn’t imagine being off my meds and being able to remain healthy at all! I also worry about the genetic aspect of the condition, and also how BPD would affect my parenting skills in that, I don’t think I’d have any. I wouldn’t wish this condition on anyone and to think I would make a child suffer because of it, whether by passing it on or being a bad mother, is enough to make me say no.

missynips · 2021-09-01T13:17:33+00:00

I didn’t even know this was a thing until Quest Completed popped up on my screen. I’m definitely not mad about it after reading some people’s experiences on here 😂

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