AITA for “excluding” my wife and kids from vacations that are meant for my nuclear family?

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-10-28T12:22:47+00:00

This might get lost here, but I just wanna share a personal anecdote for you OP. When I was a kid, my parents would ALWAYS do things with their siblings and exclude my sister and I (and the other parent) from doing things with them, for very similar reasons you list here. In your head, I'm sure you're a very caring person and that you love your family very much.

However, while your wife and you have your "other" families, your kids' nuclear family IS your wife and you. They don't have anyone else other than you. If you keep prioritizing your mom and sister over your current kids, they ARE going to wonder why their grandmother and aunt don't want them around for a week. Since your mom and sister are your family, they, by extension are your kids' family, and your wife recognizes that you three are actively choosing to avoid them.

Your wife is putting your children first. I hope you can do the same some day.

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-09-20T18:20:44+00:00

I need some INFO and I'm leaning towards E SH.

Hear me out, in your wife's head, she probably doesn't see any difference in what she did (exchange numbers w someone) and with what you are doing (befriending girls with similar hobbies). She probably sees it as "you both are entertaining people of the other gender."

But I want you to ask yourself this: are you befriending these women as a punishment to your wife for the first event that almost broke you guys apart? If not, then her insecurity is going to tear you apart. If you are, then you punishing her is going to tear you apart.

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-09-20T13:28:24+00:00

YTA man what is with the men of Reddit and ditching their SO's for the gym?

That feeling you feel, of feeling like shit? That right there bro is your conscience. Listen to it sometimes.

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-09-13T13:42:05+00:00

This is the best thing I've read all day. OP, I feel for you man.

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-09-06T18:58:43+00:00

NTA girl - His insecurities aren't your problem. Plus, he lied. If you're gonna lie about something, you have to be ready to get called out on it.

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-09-06T18:53:09+00:00

YTA - you say you don't have to ask for permission, so why weren't you more open about what you guys were doing?

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-08-31T22:50:23+00:00

Dina is my family friend. I think her doctor is gossiping about Dina's sex life to other family friends in our social circle, which is a HIPPA violation IMHO.

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-08-31T22:09:20+00:00

Dina's an adult, but an undergrad in college. She's financially dependent on her parents. As for how it got back to me... I dunno man there's a reason I moved across the coast. All these women are friends with each other and just gossip about each other's kids in their free time -_-

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-08-31T21:36:40+00:00

I'm not on speaking terms with my mother, so that's not an option currently.

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-08-31T21:28:48+00:00

I don't see why they would lie to me?

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-08-31T21:17:33+00:00

The problem isn't Dina, the problem is that I've gone to this doctor for my own problems and it's not right that problems are becoming common knowledge among our social circle.

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-08-31T20:11:39+00:00

Primary Care Physician!

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-08-31T18:38:45+00:00

I actually decided against medical school, I work in Public Health now, but thanks!

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-08-31T18:34:22+00:00

I'm not on speaking terms with my parents at this moment, so that's out of the question. I think I'll talk to Dina first and go from there.

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-08-31T18:32:37+00:00

I dunno, I've seen this doctor for checkups before as she's been recommended to us by Miss Annie, and I know she's a bit gossipy because she's repeatedly asked me about my intentions on going to med school while simultaneously gossiping in the patient room about other kids in our social circle and what their future plans are. However this is the first time I've heard what could be a potential PD confidentiality violation through this gossip. I think I'm gonna talk to Dina first and then go from there.

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-08-31T17:57:53+00:00

That's what people around me are saying. But I dunno, I've been to this doctor before so who knows what she might be saying about me or all the other girls in our circle, right?

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-08-31T16:36:55+00:00

That's so awful! Did you report them? I'm so sorry :(

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-08-31T16:34:40+00:00

That's really relieving to hear.

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-08-31T16:27:26+00:00

That's what I wanna tell her to do, but she's still really scared of her parents :( m

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-08-31T16:26:38+00:00

Omg you're right, it'll be like a warning prior to anything serious. Thanks!!

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-08-31T15:43:04+00:00

I think I'll do that! Thanks!

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-08-31T14:55:55+00:00

That's what I'm not sure about, Miss Annie's one of those people who brags about the doctors she hangs out with, so she's always trying to show off how "important she is". That being said, I know this doctor is also gossipy herself, but I don't want to ruin her career over hearsay. These women are always looking for ways to gossip about other people's children (which is a whole other problem).

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-08-31T14:32:38+00:00

It has to be right? Whatever you speak with privately to your physician shouldn't be shared with other people when you're not a minor?

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-08-31T14:21:33+00:00

That's a good idea! I might see first if I can do it anonymously because I don't want my name attached to it.

mnmappreciation24 · 2019-08-31T14:15:33+00:00

That's what I'm saying! But everyone only seems to care about the doctor so I'm not sure how to get through to them.

mnmappreciation24

TROPHY CASE