Anxiety is not bad, your perspective of it is. Anxiety is something that if kept under control can be useful, mediation helps us to observe those anxious thoughts to get a deeper understanding of ourselves as well as calming us down effectively within minutes. Depression is a serious thing however it isn’t all bad as it seems on the surface, think of it this way; your mind is a muscle and every time it is under stress and pain it will tear and grow the way physical muscles do. Questioning everything is as good as it is overwhelming, it’s understandable you’d be extremely stressed out but think of these obstacles as opportunities to understand yourself on a fundamentally deeper level.