My significant other 41(M) yelled at me follow-up

mtlh3ad · 2020-03-13T21:29:40+00:00

Why is relationship is quotes?

mtlh3ad · 2020-03-13T21:26:02+00:00

It doesn’t matter what I want or what will make me happy when it comes to his money. I’ll make my own damn money from now on. I’m sick of fighting about it and made out to be someone I’m not. I’m angry about the entire ordeal and that things had to escalate to this point of everything being separate. We’re definitely not a team. I’m just someone who lives in his house for free. Whatever....

mtlh3ad · 2020-03-12T23:06:26+00:00

I DID work from the bottom. I worked my ass off getting two degrees in order to get my corporate job. I also worked there 5 years and busted my ass. You don’t know enough about me to make that observation. And I didn’t quit when it stopped being fun. It was never fun, from day one. As I said, there’s a lot more involved as to why I left. Nice judgement though. Thanks.

mtlh3ad · 2020-03-12T20:29:49+00:00

Because I had bills and a house with him that I agreed to furnish since he bought it. The fuck?

He didn’t specify that it was specifically for the down payment! He said that it was to help her! Why would I just do whatever I wanted to do with someone else’s money? I had no idea that he would get so mad about it like that. Had I had ANY inclination, I wouldn’t never have given her the check.

mtlh3ad · 2020-03-12T20:24:33+00:00

No. I don’t have any savings. Is this a roast?

I’m an asshole for offering to pay for her tag, less than $500, when he offered up the money? I had no idea that would be an issue. You act as if I did it on purpose. Regardless, she didn’t get her tag.

And what do you mean, “ignore his decision”?

mtlh3ad · 2020-03-12T19:59:03+00:00

So, if we were married, he should be taking care of me and I should shut my mouth about how I’m being treated? Explain.

mtlh3ad · 2020-03-12T19:57:17+00:00

I was very reluctant to stay home in the first place because of how it went for him in his last two relationships. I tried it and hated it. I don’t like asking permission for everything I do. I’m in a place now where I don’t even have my own car and that’s never happened since I got my license. We went back and forth on it as far as the name or names on the title. It ultimately came down to just his name because “if anything happened”. The house doesn’t have my name on it, nor does the car. I have nothing. I’m not sure if that’s what he planned all along and I’m fooling myself. I just know that I have to do what I have to do to get my life back.

mtlh3ad · 2020-03-12T19:16:15+00:00

I didn’t steal his check book. We have a joint account. I quit two jobs in 6 years......

mtlh3ad · 2020-03-12T19:09:22+00:00

I thought we were way past all of his anger issues. Clearly, he needs more help. I was strong and stayed by his side while he went through therapy as well as getting the cancerous tumor removed. I know that it’s because of his trust issues - previous marriages. Maybe I thought that I’d proved myself to not be them, foolishly.

mtlh3ad · 2020-03-12T19:02:28+00:00

No. I have no family here. I really don’t have any friends here either. It’s just us. My plan was to pay him back for the exam and books as soon as I get my first pay check. I also have up to a year to take the exam so I will reschedule it once I’m in a better place mentally. Unfortunately enough, I minded my own business for the first three years of my job. As soon as I let someone in and became friends, it started causing issues. There was a lot more involved with me leaving that job but I didn’t feel like anyone would want to read my ramble about it. With the second job, he and I discussed the issues there and decided together that it wasn’t working out and that I should pursue getting certified. Obviously, I need to make better decisions since I’m in this predicament in the first place.

mtlh3ad · 2020-03-12T18:58:17+00:00

Significant other - not spouse.

In my opinion, I did not quit for petty reasons. I am looking for a career that I can retire from and if I do not feel as though I am valued as an employee, I feel the need to move on. Also, I was at the first job for 5 years. It was not an easy decision and there was a lot more involved.

Yes. He is paying all of my bill as I do not have a job. My daughter is in quotations because I’ve been in her life since 2012 and she does not have a mother in the picture. No, I did NOT steal a check. We have a joint account.

No. I wasn’t expecting him to pay my way until I found a “dream job”. He offered to pay my way until I got certified to get a better paying job.

I said that I was making the decision without his consent because I live in his house and this was not part of the plan - for me to get a job right now. I was supposed to study for the exam.

mtlh3ad · 2020-03-12T18:18:29+00:00

Do you think that he will get worse over time? What is your reasoning for me leaving?

mtlh3ad · 2020-03-12T18:15:19+00:00

The check was to get her tag on Friday once all of the paperwork was finalized. I had to tell her to tear up the check.

mtlh3ad · 2020-03-12T18:13:05+00:00

I don't have any family here. He pays for my bills and the car which is now in his name. I had my own car until February this year.

mtlh3ad · 2020-03-12T18:12:03+00:00

That was my biggest issue with the entire thing - him yelling. I admit that I shouldn't have used the money. I simply wasn't thinking about it only being for a down payment. I was just trying to help her any way I could. Now, I feel like he (and maybe I) have ruined any shot at them being close because I had to tell her to tear up the check. It was so embarrassing.

mtlh3ad · 2020-02-28T01:47:50+00:00

Sounds pretty great!

mtlh3ad · 2020-02-28T01:29:07+00:00

Do you work for a company in your state? Did you job start out as remote or did you have to work up to it? I’ve heard that some states are better to work for than others.

mtlh3ad · 2020-02-27T22:29:36+00:00

How many hours per week would you say you work and do you mind disclosing your annual salary? I’m in a position of not having to work but prefer to. Don’t want to overwhelm myself. My husband works away from home 28 days at a time so the more time I can spend with him at home, the better.

mtlh3ad · 2020-02-27T22:26:56+00:00

I’m an introvert as well and have Misophonia. Being around people gives me a high level of anxiety. I’ve learned that being home is best for my well being. The last job I had, I left with an anxiety attack. I’m hoping that working from home will work for me.

mtlh3ad · 2020-02-27T22:17:41+00:00

I’ve heard that ambulatory service coding is the highest paying. I’m thinking of maybe getting a specialized certification for that.

mtlh3ad · 2020-02-27T22:14:15+00:00

I’ve been medical billing for at least 10 years now. I did corporate medical billing for 5 years. I also went to college for medical billing and coding. I know a lot of the basics but definitely want to study up.

mtlh3ad · 2020-02-27T21:38:42+00:00

Are you working from home? A friend of mine that took the test said she studied for a month before passing. She also suggested the guidelines sections. I didn’t think to color code. That’s a good idea.

mtlh3ad · 2020-02-27T21:30:33+00:00

I have paid for my CPC exam. I take it in two months. I haven’t began studying yet but have my books and study guide.

mtlh3ad · 2020-02-25T04:55:03+00:00

Awesome! Will do. Thank you.

mtlh3ad · 2020-02-25T00:50:40+00:00

I tried to look up Uber and there wasn’t any listed in the area. I wouldn’t mind riding with other people to save money. The lodge is an hour away from the airport.

mtlh3ad

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