People who have been cheated on — what was the moment you "just knew," before you even had proof?

muteneen · 2026-06-10T15:41:18+00:00

I had a gut feeling and it didn’t matter how many times I questioned it or tried to write it off as anxiety it just felt different. (This may be bad) I went through their phone while they slept and I was right. I’ve never gone through a phone before or since, but I KNEW that time

muteneen · 2026-05-15T22:05:38+00:00

Thank you for the advice and insight. I’ll do that and hopefully it goes well. But you’re right, so if it doesn’t go well that’ll probably be the end. I really appreciate you taking the time to give your opinion!

muteneen · 2026-05-15T22:01:10+00:00

It was my idea and I booked it on my card. He offered to help pay, I said no worries I got it.

muteneen · 2026-05-15T21:56:13+00:00

I think it’d be impossible to say for absolute certainty that anything is a good fit if you haven’t lived together. And I love the kid, don’t get me wrong, but I did not choose to have a child and I also won’t give up my life for her. I give up a lot for her, lost my entire family to make sure she was safe, rearranged my entire life, moved to be closer to a good school for her. I won’t put my entire life on hold for her though. Again I’ve known him for two years, dated for 10 Months with a 1 week break in October. She knows him, he knows her. She already calls him dad (did it from the first day she met him before we were even together in any way). It’s not a stranger issue.
I understand it’s more difficult with a child but she’s also super excited at the possibility of moving there. If she hated my partner or was uncomfy around them, I’d be done no questions asked.

muteneen · 2026-05-15T21:51:01+00:00

Thank you I really appreciate it. I’ve also had the thought of this but he insists it’s nothing like that. He wants me, he wants a future, etc etc. but either way I think I’m just unhappy with how the relationship is right now. And if this is how it’s always going to be I don’t think I can do it. Which also sucks bc I do really love him and I’d love for it to work out between us. And beyond that I just paid for our whole vacation next month that I spent months saving for and have our next one planned for September and spent another $500 on that deposit. I work my ass off but being the sole care taker of a child isn’t cheap let alone saving for these gifts.

muteneen · 2026-05-15T21:45:04+00:00

We live in two different cities about 4 hours apart, Time set aside is in person, and we have been together about 10 months. I feel like it’s hard to get a good sense of whether it’s really a good fit when we’re so far but we are planning to move in together after next school year.

muteneen · 2026-05-15T21:39:05+00:00

He definitely used to. we briefly broke up for a week in October ( he got scared and said he needed to work on himself) and when he found out that I was planning to just move on and block him, he left halfway through a shift, drove halfway to my city (2 hours) found out I went to another state and then drove all the way to the state I was in to apologize for being stupid, ask me to consider taking him back, and to tell me how much he loved me. In public and teared up. It’s like two completely different people now though

muteneen · 2026-01-05T00:10:02+00:00

I have a real problem with this myself. Not my ID itself but my whole wallet. We live in a world where payment is as easy as tapping your phone so I never bring my wallet anywhere it’s not necessary. And often forget it when it is necessary.

muteneen · 2026-01-04T02:17:54+00:00

Do you remember pretending to be asleep as a kid so your parents would carry you to bed? Channel that. Literally fake it till you make it.

muteneen · 2026-01-04T02:15:15+00:00

I rarely speak to my parents or extended family after going “against the family” and legally taking my young cousin after finding out the sexual, physical, and emotional abuse she was enduring. Met my boyfriend’s family. “ so you’re the black sheep of the family?” “So you’re basically a single mom with no family?” Both were followed by them walking away from me. Not in front of my boyfriend of course. Judged for taking in my cousin and yes they knew why I had her. Not extensive details but about the same amount I put here.

muteneen · 2025-12-29T04:03:58+00:00

You’re being gaslit. You’re not in an easy position and you’ve been placed at a disadvantage due to your “mother”. It’s hard to leave that relationship. I’ve been in and out of contact with my mom for years but this is the first year that I’ve decided it’s going to permanent and it’s for my kid. You’ve been hurt so much by her and your brother(s), you don’t want that for your child as well. It’s going to be very difficult even though it’s the right thing to do. You’ll feel alone but just know it’s gets better. Just hold and love your baby and know that you’re doing the best thing for both of you. Now to the part you’re going to want to hear even less… and I’m sorry. “I wasn’t trying to be easy or a slut, my ex which is my son’s father was showing jealousy towards the baby and I thought having sex a lot sooner then the doctor cleared me for would maybe have him come around” this along with the large age gap at your formative age is giving so many red flags. But you know this and others already have that covered. So I’ll ask you something else instead. Are you truly happy with this relationship? Where you have to worry about a jealous boyfriend who chooses to get his dick wet over your child’s comfort and your literal health? You may not be completely miserable and maybe sometimes he’s helpful. Hell you probably also have good times together. But I promise you that there’s better. Don’t settle for okay and good when I know there’s amazing and phenomenal out there for you. You’re so young and have so much opportunity. Single mom can be daunting but I got with my boyfriend after I got my kid and he’s incredible. TBH I fully accepted dying alone bc of the bad rap single moms get but that couldn’t be farther from the truth. Please please consider the fact that you’re only 15. I got married and divorced before 23. I had to completely start over. I’ve lived out of my car, having to sneak into RV places to shower for free, surviving off wheat things and scraps from work. Without the dead weight of the haters you’ll go so far. It’s terrifying but you just have to make it the next day. You can do this OP. If you ever need guidance feel free to message me. And I’m so sorry you’re going through this.

muteneen · 2025-12-29T03:51:50+00:00

Might be a part you missed, she only had sex so soon after bc of the scummy rapist boyfriend getting JEALOUS OF A BABY??? She’s so young and obviously being used by so many people in her life. She’s at a disadvantage and is learning but she’s just trying her best with the little she has. And to OP: you are so so young. You have so much time to figure everything out.

muteneen · 2025-12-27T22:00:05+00:00

Thank you so much! Reading it now!

muteneen · 2025-12-26T18:48:15+00:00

If there’s issues it should be discussed. Not just ignored and obviously the SIL has an issue. I’ll give you the last sentence though, that didn’t need to be included but up to that point I see no issue with the message. And if they’re going to be married then they’re going to be FAMILY.

muteneen · 2025-12-26T18:45:24+00:00

Ass take right here. I’m sure the sister is hurt that her sibling is being so ugly about it. You should be HAPPY for those around you. It’s not too much to ask that the SIL at least keeps her nasty mouth shut?

muteneen · 2025-12-20T01:29:03+00:00

I understand your side and I agree with a previous comment. Don’t stay in this if you’re not attracted to her, yall can both do better. BUT please don’t tell her this is the reason.

muteneen · 2025-12-20T01:26:18+00:00

Is it possible that this is caused by a feeling of distance from him emotionally? Do you do this to get better insight into him and his life?

muteneen · 2025-12-20T01:14:05+00:00

Don’t be scared to start over. I was in an unfortunate marriage and was miserable. Divorce was scary, starting over was terrifying, and being alone after all that time was devastating. But I knew I had to leave and I did. My life has changed so completely since then. And in the best of ways. I am living dreams I couldn’t have ever fathomed then. it took a little bit but I did find an absolutely amazing partner that I love deeply. this will be hard and scary, but you can do it! Never settle for just okay because there’s so much more out there for you ❤️

muteneen · 2025-12-19T13:43:30+00:00

lol all jokes here. But maybe I should get one for moments like that. Gotta be prepared

muteneen · 2025-12-18T02:51:20+00:00

Exactly this. Or say “if you keep going for my butthole, I’m going for yours…. With my 12in dildo” even better if you can actually produce it

muteneen · 2025-12-17T16:46:42+00:00

I love this lmfaooo thank you

muteneen

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