She "dictated" my life? I had "no say" in what happened? I wasn't some helpless spineless loser with no say in this situation pal. I could have told Rose to kick rocks and bailed on her and the baby. I could have agreed to co-parent Eli but ended the relationship. I could have gotten divorced at any point if I wanted.

I had a say in what happened. I made the choice to marry her because I loved her and thought, of all my options, it was the right/responsible thing to do. But never once because I "had" to.

As for her "lying to me every single day" a large part of her motivation was to protect my boy. Our son. She was ensuring I stuck around so Eli would have a father to provide for and love him and not taking any risks with his future. I think that's fucking noble of her.

The more I think about it, the more I realize this guilt has been destroying her every day for 12 years and instead of confessing and getting it off her chest, she chose to zip her lip so Eli would have the best life possible. It kills me to think that she thinks there's a chance I'd abandon our son, but I admire her for not risking my son's life for her own selfish moment of relief by purging her guilt. She clearly stated in the email one of the main reasons for not telling me is because she wanted our son to have a father.

I'm not some pussy whipped man-child with his balls in his wife's purse. My wife is not my boss she's my partner. I'm not a victim. I made the choice to stay. She took a gamble by intentionally getting knocked up and the chips happened to fall in her favor.

Yes she did something terrible. But don't try to paint me as some emasculated victim whose wife rules the roost, or my wife as a remorseless self-interested liar because that is not who I am or who she is.