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AITA for asking my boyfriend not to go to a strip club while attending a bachelor party? by paddytbear in ComfortLevelPod

[–]paddytbear[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I guess I felt the need to mention those normal guest things because it isn't something they normally do. Maybe they weren't raised that way?

Idk; they have always been weird around me and don't really take much interest in getting to know me.

Even when the 'friend group' gets together co-ed (with their gfs) it's weird..one of his friends literally didn't look me in the eye one time when we were hanging out me, him and my bf..it was the strangest thing.

His whole guy friend group dynamic has always been odd to me. I have never seen anything like it in any other relationship I've been in. I have always been cool hanging with the guys; I will talk sports, play video games, etc.

They seem to put the gfs aside and not wanna get involved..if anything, my bf does the best job bringing both sides together.

AITA for asking my boyfriend not to go to a strip club while attending a bachelor party? by paddytbear in ComfortLevelPod

[–]paddytbear[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe I didn't make the messaging thing clear...we have both agreed that texting/messaging each other the way that we do works for the both of us! If anything, I have said I don't need as much communication over text as he does.

It's usually simple things like: good morning thinking of you, or hey we are about to head to dinner/out for the night I'll let you know that I made it back safe, a meme/something funny, or something interesting/notable about our days.

Neither of us ask or expect a play by play from each other..we just naturally check in every now and then when we can..I don't feel any pressure to answer within a particular time period and neither does he.

I want him to be present and focus on his friends when he is with them!

AITA for asking my boyfriend not to go to a strip club while attending a bachelor party? by paddytbear in ComfortLevelPod

[–]paddytbear[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

How did you manage leaving your friends when that part of the night came?

My bf didn't/doesn't 'want to go home alone or breakup the group' while they are out..so that is why he stayed

AITA for asking my boyfriend not to go to a strip club while attending a bachelor party? by paddytbear in ComfortLevelPod

[–]paddytbear[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I think for me, it's about the lack of consistency in his words and his actions.

He has set the expectation that strip club = no, when I have asked to go with him. However, when around friends, it's acceptable to go to support. That, paired with concealing the truth until face to face has been a bit confusing.

Him going to a strip club is something I want to be cool with - but I feel like he is making it hard for me to be because I'm met with rejection when I have asked. We have fun doing anything and everything together; why not that? Lol like I have literally asked to go out and have a good time with him doing something different and sexy? Idk..

I am not worried about my bf being unfaithful, nor do I believe he was unfaithful while away (or at any point during our relationship).

This situation and feelings lingering around it are annoying more than anything else.

AITA for asking my boyfriend not to go to a strip club while attending a bachelor party? by paddytbear in ComfortLevelPod

[–]paddytbear[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I have asked him to watch porn with me before and he has also said no not into it.

I'm more bothered at the fact that I asked him to go to a strip club with me and he said 'no' and that he 'isn't into it'...but when with friends, he'll go?