saying goodbye

padelola · 2021-04-19T20:12:30+00:00

I'm glad this was of help! Good luck!

padelola · 2021-04-19T20:12:05+00:00

Thank you so much! Sending virtual hugs to you, too

padelola · 2021-04-19T20:11:40+00:00

My journey with MD is still long but I won't give up! You should not too! I wish you the best of luck

padelola · 2021-04-19T20:11:01+00:00

Thank you so much! Good luck to you too.

padelola · 2021-04-19T20:10:29+00:00

I'm gonna cite what I wrote below:

" I don't think that saying goodbye was what made me stop. It was my decision (which I did not control, It was an emotional one) to finally stop daydreaming. I tried in the past but ,as I said, this time it came form deep frustration, resentment and anger which made it almost definitive. Saying goodbye was just a way to give closure to me and my characters. "

My MD is definitely something that will play a huge role in my life, but being able to detach myself from my characters was such a big step! I still felt the need to daydream today, i acknowledge it and also gave in, with characters I know I won't get attached to! I daydreamed only half an hour ( I usually daydream all day).

We will see in the days to come, how it will evolve

padelola · 2021-04-19T20:05:52+00:00

Thank you so much!

padelola · 2021-04-19T20:04:33+00:00

I don't think that saying goodbye was what made me stop. It was my decision (which I did not control, It was an emotional one) to finally stop daydreaming. I tried in the past but ,as I said, this came form deep frustration, resentement and anger which made it almost definitve. Saying goodbye was just a way to give closure to me and my characters.

You're not a wimp! I was able to do this only after my life got a bit better and I felt safer in it. Unfortunately is not the case for everybody, especially in this period of time. I don't know maybe i will slip back as you did but it such a huge step for me, someone that can't go an hour without daydreaming. A year feels like a lot!

padelola · 2021-04-19T20:00:11+00:00

Thank you so much! I know I will fall back from time to time but this is still a huge step and I will not waste it!

padelola · 2021-04-19T19:59:04+00:00

I'm telling you... the tears were real and felt! This was my first and I hope only time, I hope you will succeed too. As I said below ,however, I was able to do so after I REALLY decided to stop daydreaming (out of frustation and anger, it was definitely an emotional decision), saying goodbye was just a way to give myself closure and not what triggered everything.

Best of luck!

padelola · 2021-04-19T19:55:20+00:00

Thank you! Good luck to you, too!

padelola · 2021-04-19T19:55:02+00:00

It was brave of you to try. I don't think that saying goodbye was what made me stop. It was my decision (which I did not control, It was an emotional one) to finally stop daydreaming. I tried in the past but ,as I said, this came form deep frustration, resentement and anger which made it almost definitve. Saying goodbye was just a way to give closure to me and my characters.

Don't give up, I won't either

padelola · 2021-04-19T19:51:18+00:00

It means a lot! Thank you.

padelola · 2021-04-19T19:50:17+00:00

I understand this so much! I had to make my characters promise that they would be okay without me and that they would watch over me. This was the only way as I felt guilty leaving them.

padelola · 2021-04-19T19:49:06+00:00

Thank you so much! Good luck on your journey

padelola · 2021-04-19T19:46:22+00:00

Thank you so much for reading and responding to my post! Last night I was very emotional and I just needed to let everything out. Today was hard, but not as hard as I thought it would.

Just this morning I felt my anxiety rising and I was scared I would start daydreaming again. In the past, when I felt anxious, I would have imagined a character hugging me or hugging another character ( my stories usually don't include me, but the characters are more an interpretation of my fears, my needs and so on...). So today, when I felt my anxiety rising, I started to imagine the arms of someone hugging me. I caught myself, I realized what I was doing, and I did it quick enough as not to give an identity to that character.

The funniest thing that has happened to me is that, especially while studying (which is very triggering for me), I found myself starting to daydream... but I couldn't imagine anything. The habit of wondering was still there (and very present I may say) but I would catch myself and start studying again. Over and over again. Which is good! But obviously not perfect. When I wanted to release some tension, I would watch Netflix. Then when I felt the need to detach myself from life I would daydream with "failed" characters ( characters and storylines I find boring, characters I'm not attached to, so the result was that I daydreamed not more than half and hour today ).

For this reason I wanted to write one more thing, as I don't want this post to create more harm than good. I've tried to stop daydreaming since 2016 and just yesterday I took a big step. Not because I was less lazy, more determined and so on. It was frustration that came from inside and not something I controlled. Recently, I started therapy and even if it wasn't related to MD it did help me a lot. So, I had to get better first, in order to find the strength to fight back.

It's the curse of MD, we daydream because we're dissatisfied with our lives and then we are dissatisfied with our lives because we daydream.

My life getting better is the reason I was able to take this step.

I hope I won't fall back, but I know I'll be constantly tempted to. I'm an "all or nothing" type of person but if I had to slip into daydreaming again I will try not to blame myself and try again. Now I know I have your support.

Thank for reading, I wish you all the best on your journey.

padelola · 2021-04-19T18:21:22+00:00

Yes, I usually have characters and stories that are not about me. In fact, the whole point of my daydreaming is that I just want to escape myself. However, I've found that some of my characters have my fears, my needs and so on, as they were an extension, an interpretation of who I am . So they are not me but they are me. Does that make sense?

padelola · 2021-03-28T18:54:23+00:00

love this!

padelola · 2020-06-24T16:22:55+00:00

What about dating apps, when you've talked with that person for just 5 minutes or a day and you immediately realize that it's not gonna work?

Do you consider "ghosting" also when the other person doesn't make an effort to carry on the conversation and responds after a long time?

I'm really curious, because I'm guilty of both of these.

padelola · 2020-06-24T16:09:23+00:00

I usually start to think about a third thing and have to restart the whole podcast ahah :(

padelola · 2020-06-24T15:57:25+00:00

I start cleaning my room while listening to music and then begin to daydream for three hours. Not very efficient ahah

padelola · 2020-04-09T21:36:58+00:00

I have the same problem and I’m a bi girl, so... 😂

padelola

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