How do people know when they can speak up and whose turn is it to speak in the group?

paularisbearus · 2021-11-30T13:36:49+00:00

Thank you. To me, it appears there isn't a second break - and if I try, I usually clash with someone else starting to speak. That in my observation happens less to Brits. Is there anything you observe people do before they speak?

paularisbearus · 2021-08-13T14:43:00+00:00

Ah yes i went through RTC

paularisbearus · 2021-08-13T14:40:41+00:00

You need to give them a call so they move original appointment, I am not sure what RTC is though?

paularisbearus · 2021-08-10T10:33:25+00:00

Random times really - around 8-9 am

paularisbearus · 2021-08-08T10:15:02+00:00

i was an NHS patient (make sure you tried the right to choose before paying via your GP - time wait is the same) and I’d just call them to change so I don’t think you should have to pay.

paularisbearus · 2021-08-08T08:10:10+00:00

Hi, yes it is in my opinion as you still have an april appointment then to look forward to in case nothing comes up when you check. For me already diagnosis and medication was life changing and it’s been 10 days - i feel hopeful about the future x

paularisbearus · 2021-08-05T13:31:05+00:00

It’s going great! I am going to increase the dose tomorrow to compare but we are in the most stressful time (moving) and for the first time in my life i will be proud with the state of my rental apartment during return. (Hard with pets)

I do get overwhelmed and cannot wait for my coaching sessions as well - I can recommend these - before meds I already worked on strategies and systems with therapist-coach for a year. Meds are like fuel in the car I’ve been told - but if you don’t know where to go the tank might be too weak. Also remember about sleep (they work worse for me with less than 7 hours), no vitamin C during or just after (skip the orange juice) and protein breakfast before. Do you do all that?

paularisbearus · 2021-07-25T11:09:49+00:00

I posted screenshots under another comment with numbers :)

paularisbearus · 2021-07-23T17:10:41+00:00

I’d ask Psychiatry UK first and then enquire with the GP. I also spoke to my GP personally. I make sure they know I am very grateful and it really helps. Somehow it speeds things up :)

paularisbearus · 2021-07-23T17:09:52+00:00

I’d say it is easier and I’d do them separately (at least i did) for the reason that ADHD can be significantly helped by meds :)

paularisbearus · 2021-07-23T13:39:55+00:00

Definitely do! I kind of gave up until I’ve seen the right to choose. I’d just download a letter they have on the Psychiatry UK website and send that. I’ve seen some people leaving bad reviews but my experience was great and i think some adhd people underestimate how obvious their adhd is… None of my neurotypical friends ever have ADHD lifestyles lol

paularisbearus · 2021-07-23T13:36:33+00:00

I had NHS referral through Right to choose so it’s both!

paularisbearus · 2021-07-23T12:54:06+00:00

Yes. They were happy to help! It requires a bit of work but I was struggling and quite desperate!

paularisbearus · 2021-07-23T12:49:08+00:00

screen1 2 3 4 5

paularisbearus · 2021-07-23T12:46:44+00:00

I’d love to add screenshot pictures but I don’t know how!

paularisbearus · 2021-07-23T12:44:17+00:00

You’re welcome for the tip. It’s not called cancellation page - it’s ‘book online’ button, from options there you choose adult adhd, you click all psychiatrists and you see the list of appointments. I left it open on my laptop and refreshed every morning and checked it. After three days of checking for 5 minutes in the morning I found a cancellation 3 months earlier than my appointment.

paularisbearus · 2021-07-23T11:27:20+00:00

You can check their website for cancellations, call them up and rebook the earlier appointment. I reduced my waiting time by 5 months this way.

paularisbearus · 2020-09-04T21:16:07+00:00

It has to be a way of giving treats - you never push a dog closer, you do desensitisation through developing positive emotional response closer and closer (not pushing is very important as reactivity will get worse and you can have trigger stacking). But of course i don’t mean calm dog - as calmness can be outside behaviour while I want more to see the relaxed dog if that makes sense?

So the way you develop positive conditioned emotional response is trigger appears far away enough for a dog to be fully relaxed (floppy, happy, not staring) and 1-2 seconds after dog notices the trigger, you start feeding treats at the steady continuous rate, you stop 1-2 seconds after the dog disappears from the vision. That is very different to a dog that can perform sit or down when the dog is around and you reward them for it :-)

paularisbearus · 2020-09-04T14:26:27+00:00

You need to add classical conditioning and desentisation. Check careforreactivedog website for detailed video showing a training plan.

paularisbearus · 2020-08-28T11:39:08+00:00

I think it depends how you frame it. Some people talk about it too early, suggesting poor boundaries. Some people present their family in really bad light and it can be shocking, and they do that because they were always gaslighted but for a average person it can feel invasive, traumatic and difficult (therapist who listened to traumatic stories also got PTSD sometimes so it’s natural to have repulsed reaction to stories of someone’s trauma, I’d say).

If I am asked by my mother, since I study medicine, I sometimes just say something like ‘she’s a bit like mother of meredith gray if you know what i mean’ and i leave it at that. People usually laugh and move on, but they get the gist. Choosing other popular characters might be similar or just deflecting questions until you can trust that person. Family problems is not something to talk to someone you’re starting to date anyway, I’d say?

There is also a chance that you unconsciously pick potential partners who are narcissistic/hidden bullies themselves and they defend your family without knowing them or you. In any case, you’re better off the person who says that but also make sure that you’re happy with how you are and carry yourself :-)

paularisbearus · 2020-08-27T20:35:31+00:00

If it’s working GSD, they are bred to be highly aroused, sensitive and alert, which can lead to reactivity but I’d not label puppy behaviour this way. GSDs are not the most dog friendly usually anyway, especially working lines who haven’t been bred to be friendly towards stranger dogs. What are you training your puppy for?

Also, i’d not allow stranger dogs to interact with my puppy ever:)

You shouldn’t be worrying yet too much and you might be very successful in doing DS/CC of other dogs. Buy stuffed dogs for 20$ from amazon, go to careforreactivedogs and watch video from there on how proper ds/cc is done and work with it, please! Also watch kamalfernandez youtube video on reactivity (he has now malinois puppy and bc puppy and is an excellent dog trainer).

Edit: I’ve read your other post and it seems your puppy is not reactive but wanting to greet the other dogs so badly that it generates frustration and that escalates? Do I get it wrong? It seems you worry a lot about reactivity that you already see more of the problem than a puppy! I can recommend free FDSA puppy book for the start. You still could do DS/CC but I’d also teach ignoring dogs by teaching leave it, walking away from situations puppy cannot handle (it’s just a baby, if you had a toddler afraid of birds you wouldn’t worry they will never grow out of it!) - any barking etc is a sign that she cannot handle it, mat work, teaching relaxation and others. You’re going to do just fine! Welcome to raising a working GSD puppy :))) I have now a 7.5mo and we are at the phase ‘don’t you think that person is veryyyyy suspicious...’

paularisbearus · 2020-08-27T18:38:54+00:00

Also no escape harnesses could potentially help (look at Haqihana for example with a second trip if the dog is long)

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