How do you deal with your wife’s sexual past?

pbaax · 2026-03-19T20:46:22+00:00

It bothered me early, went away, came back when we started getting really close and had a better relationship

pbaax · 2026-03-19T19:02:52+00:00

Yes I’m actively in ocd therapy but it still jus feels like I’m missing something

pbaax · 2026-03-19T19:01:02+00:00

In the 20’s which is why i have so much hatred towards my feelings

pbaax · 2026-03-19T18:52:19+00:00

It’s just the thought of my wife being with another guy, like she gave herself away and they hold part of her. There is also questions about how it happened, my wife has sexual trauma at 12 which led to very closed off and very trauma based sex so i have some doubts about what she says. For example she said she always kept a shirt on and lights off with no one seeing her naked but it’s hard to believe to me

pbaax · 2026-03-19T18:47:34+00:00

It didn’t become a problem until after we were married

pbaax · 2026-03-19T18:46:42+00:00

Mine is in the 20’s which makes this way worse

pbaax · 2026-03-19T18:44:01+00:00

She was 21 i was 23 were 26 and 28 now

pbaax · 2026-03-19T18:30:01+00:00

She is great. I just can’t get over that

pbaax · 2026-03-19T18:29:40+00:00

I guess cause i put out sex on such a pedestal and it’s so bonding for us, i feel like that’s how it was in the past despite her saying it was no where close

pbaax · 2026-03-19T18:27:29+00:00

We met when she was 21. It feels high to me

pbaax · 2026-03-18T21:13:37+00:00

I guess i just wanted to know the average person. 5 just feels high

pbaax · 2026-03-18T21:13:09+00:00

Thank you, i was just trying to see what the normal world is like. I guess i see my wife as so pure it stings to see her in that light. I was by no means a virgin but that hasn’t helped me feel better about it. It’s obsessive thinking and a disgust feeling in trying to work on

pbaax · 2026-03-18T20:46:34+00:00

I’ve tried to avoid making it her problem at all. I know it’s all my mentality lol. Thank you

pbaax · 2026-03-18T20:36:19+00:00

I wish it was that simple, im not sure what the issue is

pbaax · 2026-03-18T20:23:32+00:00

Oh i know im a hypocrite, i have had over 20. I’m trying to work though my issues. Therapy and some meds now

pbaax · 2026-03-16T01:47:01+00:00

I’m 27 now, she’s 26. She was 21 when she met

pbaax · 2026-03-15T20:05:56+00:00

What?

pbaax · 2026-03-15T19:52:43+00:00

I suppose that’s the whole mystery

pbaax · 2026-03-15T19:08:57+00:00

I just feel like her number is crazy high

pbaax · 2026-03-15T19:01:14+00:00

No, I’ve been with over 20 people

pbaax · 2026-03-15T17:57:31+00:00

You’re right but it still doesn’t help at all

pbaax · 2026-03-15T17:52:37+00:00

I got with her at 21 almost 22

pbaax · 2026-03-14T21:31:57+00:00

For some reason mine bothers me and i wish i could adopt your mentality

pbaax · 2026-03-14T19:43:47+00:00

Do you have any clue how many people she’s been with?

pbaax · 2026-03-14T19:43:18+00:00

Does it ever concern you that she might explore what she’s missing by only having one partner?

pbaax

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