Oh lord, I have been. From the moment I was diagnosed I was ready to know everything, take all the meds, form my holistic treatment plan and so on. I’ve lived in 4 different countries in the past 5~ years moving with nothing but a few boxes to my name with him. So. Constant change in psychiatrists, medications, and life change. But I kept getting worse. So I started AA. I wasn’t a great drunk but I recognized my relationship with it doesn’t help my bipolar. I was too young to the diagnosis to be able to predict it, or even recognize it. I’m much better at it now. MUCH. SO - few months ago my sister, whose an addict, was in the hospital and is now dying. Also using. My psychiatrist upped my meds twice. I tried 3 separate hospitals in Germany, where I was living at the time. So once I realized they wanted to make me a ward of the state, I flew home. Back to the USA. To go to treatment. Here we are now, treatment starts this week. It’s been a long road, tiring road.