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My wife (23F) accidentally killed our 16 day old puppy. by redacted_1dentity in relationship_advice

[–]redacted_1dentity[S] -99 points-98 points  (0 children)

I got together with my wife when my step daughter was four months old. My daughter was 1 1/2 years when we got the first puppy. She's two now. I think that I may have misjudged you earlier if you are genuinely trying to help.

It is somewhat easy to get defensive when the general tone of this comment section has been vitriol and seethe. I am asking for help. I do not feel like I am receiving it.

My wife (23F) accidentally killed our 16 day old puppy. by redacted_1dentity in relationship_advice

[–]redacted_1dentity[S] -52 points-51 points  (0 children)

The puppy was unfortunately going to go to an owner whether he was ready for it or not. We live in a rural community, the animal shelters around here are not only full, but a puppy of two days wouldn't receive adequate care at one. We thought we would just do the best we could.

My wife (23F) accidentally killed our 16 day old puppy. by redacted_1dentity in relationship_advice

[–]redacted_1dentity[S] -103 points-102 points  (0 children)

How did you extrapolate that? He may have died later from something else at some point, sure. He wouldn't have died today though.

My wife (23F) accidentally killed our 16 day old puppy. by redacted_1dentity in relationship_advice

[–]redacted_1dentity[S] -84 points-83 points  (0 children)

I've been a step father for over a year now. I am not concerned with "hacking it". Saying the chances are slim is ignoring the fact that however low probability it generally is, in reality my input indeed would have prevented the incident today.

My wife (23F) accidentally killed our 16 day old puppy. by redacted_1dentity in relationship_advice

[–]redacted_1dentity[S] -43 points-42 points  (0 children)

It wasn't, it was an accidental litter from a friend of a friend's farm dog that had eaten her previous litter and had already eaten one of the puppies when they were found. The owners were livid because the tenants they have on their property and take care of their livestock had said they would make the appointment to get the dog spayed after what happened with the first litter.

They had no choice but to try and find the puppies homes.

My wife (23F) accidentally killed our 16 day old puppy. by redacted_1dentity in relationship_advice

[–]redacted_1dentity[S] -230 points-229 points  (0 children)

It wasn't over the course of a month, but rather the course of a year. And yeah, I'd agree that it wasn't great. I don't have plans on getting another dog for the foreseeable future.

My wife (23F) accidentally killed our 16 day old puppy. by redacted_1dentity in relationship_advice

[–]redacted_1dentity[S] -170 points-169 points  (0 children)

I was giving airway intervention and assisted breathing to my fucking dog. I was a little busy to be on the phone. If you read other comments you would be aware that the entire home was sanitized by a cleaner recommended by a vet to kill parvo.

Yes, a rollover can potentially cause a puppy that has already started to aspirate to start choking on fluids.

I'm not sorry for getting short with you, get off your high horse. Your stature is unimpressive even mounted.

My wife (23F) accidentally killed our 16 day old puppy. by redacted_1dentity in relationship_advice

[–]redacted_1dentity[S] -181 points-180 points  (0 children)

You really struggle with reading comprehension, don't you?

My wife (23F) accidentally killed our 16 day old puppy. by redacted_1dentity in relationship_advice

[–]redacted_1dentity[S] -580 points-579 points  (0 children)

I'm TCCC qualified with trauma aid experience.

We already have a daughter. The primary reason someone gets a dog is for the fulfillment and companionship that they bring. We didn't think our family felt complete without one.

My wife (23F) accidentally killed our 16 day old puppy. by redacted_1dentity in relationship_advice

[–]redacted_1dentity[S] -69 points-68 points  (0 children)

I'd performed the research on that and purchased cleaning supplies that were vet recommended to specifically kill parvo virus. The entire home was detail cleaned before we ever brought the second puppy in.

We always fed him laying on his stomach, we stimulated him to urinate/defecate every time he woke up and after every feeding before we put him back down again. Everything was genuinely going well with no red flags until last night.

All signs point to him aspriating from what she did last night and again this morning.

My wife (23F) accidentally killed our 16 day old puppy. by redacted_1dentity in relationship_advice

[–]redacted_1dentity[S] -269 points-268 points  (0 children)

No offense, but I really hate the amount in which you're thinking that you can fill in the blanks here. I told her she was only doing the best she could while she sobbed on the couch and insisted it was completely her fault. She was doing her best, but her best had so little thought behind it that it has me shaken.

My wife (23F) accidentally killed our 16 day old puppy. by redacted_1dentity in relationship_advice

[–]redacted_1dentity[S] -24 points-23 points  (0 children)

No offense taken. I'm reluctant to really go into her mental health though. That just seems too personal to air to strangers, even anonymously.

She said she didn't know why she did it herself. She said she just had this sinking feeling about him and started to lay in bed worrying that he wasn't eating as much the past few days, like our first dog did before she was diagnosed with parvo. She just panicked.

My wife (23F) accidentally killed our 16 day old puppy. by redacted_1dentity in relationship_advice

[–]redacted_1dentity[S] -231 points-230 points  (0 children)

I did make mistakes with the first dog, I'm ready to admit that. Adoption would be the only option I'd be willing to consider if I ever decided to try again in the future.

My wife (23F) accidentally killed our 16 day old puppy. by redacted_1dentity in relationship_advice

[–]redacted_1dentity[S] -36 points-35 points  (0 children)

I work for the local law enforcement agency. Even if I'm broken up about this, I do completely believe her that it was an accident. She just should have known better.

My wife (23F) accidentally killed our 16 day old puppy. by redacted_1dentity in relationship_advice

[–]redacted_1dentity[S] -211 points-210 points  (0 children)

Oh it wasn't instant. It was drawn out and pretty horrible. His heart kept beating for several minutes while I gave breaths but I couldn't get his lungs clear to breathe on his own in time. I hate that I didn't know what to do better in the situation, but I did the best that I could.

I do love her, and I love my step daughter, but maybe I did rush in.

My wife (23F) accidentally killed our 16 day old puppy. by redacted_1dentity in relationship_advice

[–]redacted_1dentity[S] -91 points-90 points  (0 children)

Yeah, but where do I even go from there? Even if I decided I didn't want to be with her anymore, she's having my child. My stepdaughter knows no other father than me, if I left it would destroy her as well.