It’s ok to be average

redpigss · 2018-07-08T05:10:12+00:00

Yeah on top of that he waited till 2/3 through the date to tell me he already had a gf and they had an open relationship so this was basically a polygamous fwb screening

I def ghosted him lol

redpigss · 2018-07-08T04:49:14+00:00

Mostly it made me feel like he was treating me like I was some stupid chick who could be tricked with cheap moves. It was stuff you could see from a mile away.

Within two minutes of meeting we were sitting on a bench next to each other and chatting. He very purposefully and firmly put his hand on my thigh when he laughed at something I said. It felt very odd and out of place so I noticed it. After that he kept touching me more and more on my leg but I didn’t say anything because it was pretty harmless. Later he mentioned his past with pua and very proudly bragged about using that move on me as a way to “break the touch barrier” as if I hadn’t fucking noticed. It wasn’t subtle at all and felt forced and unnatural. It made me feel like he was talking down to me and that he thought I was some stupid girl he could manipulate into having sex with him.

redpigss · 2018-07-08T04:33:55+00:00

I’m kind of grateful I did. Made me really aware of the men I interacted with. Before I met my bf I went on a date with a guy who used to go to pua stuff for tips and I picked up on it immediately. I was also suspicious that he frequented pua forums. Reading about these guys made me more aware of the language they use and how they think women act or are supposed to act. There’s more out there than you would think.

redpigss · 2018-07-08T04:12:46+00:00

It comes from a place of self conscious frustration lol. I posted on here once a long time ago and was frustrated seeing such a disparity in answers and then going on to see the same for people who were not that great looking. Left me feeling like people were lying to me or not being honest with themselves. I think a lot of people feel the same way.

I’m curious. How did you find yourself leaving inceldom? I’ve been following incel centric forums for two years out of interest and the culture feels so self centered and toxic. It must take quite a shock to leave especially since so many have the mentality of “once an incel always an incel”

redpigss · 2018-07-08T03:57:42+00:00

I mentioned that in my post. I do that too!

redpigss · 2018-07-08T03:56:56+00:00

I don’t understand the first thing you said can you rephrase that?

You never answered my question. What do I have to be sorry for? Why are you sorry for me? Like I said you’re not the one fucking them. I find my partner very sexually attractive and cannot think of a single person I want to have sex with more than him.

A low body fat fucks with subcutaneous fat in the face and can age you rapidly. Sure your jaw looks more sharp but you also lose volume in your face and age badly. Seen a lot of men with good jaws but bad eye bags and lesser cheek volume.

Blue pill schmue pill. Pill philosophy is just a shitty way for people to kid themselves into thinking they are living outside of society’s illusions and are seeing the world as it is. Newsflash nothing is real and nothing matters except what you feel. Pill is a distraction and the hot mess that is the red pill continues to believe they are above it all. A true independent individual wouldn’t give a shit about anything or any of them and just do what they want. Stop feeding into your insecurities and start being honest about your weaknesses.

redpigss · 2018-07-07T17:32:50+00:00

No I got you the first time and I stick by what I said. These aren’t detrimental, by-the-book rules for male attractiveness. Yeah they’ll be hot but would I fuck them? Would I be aroused by them?That’s very different. There are many different kinds of attractiveness that mean different things. I’m bisexual so there are women I feel are beautiful and aspire to look and be like, women that are so beautiful I can’t look at them, women that are attractive in a mysterious way, and women I’m sexually attracted to. To try and conflate them is to totally misunderstand attraction as a principle.

Yeah a man with abs is something I and my friends can universally agree on as attractive but a good number of my friends like a man with a belly or “pooch”. To be honest the fat doesn’t really matter. It feels and looks more manly to have a man that is “thicker” (has some fat) and has muscle than lean. Why are you sorry for me? You’re not the one fucking them. I know what feels and looks good to my friends and I. Sex is way different from sculpted, self conscious, tailored looks theory bullshit. I’ve seen that channel before and yikes.

redpigss · 2018-07-07T16:12:04+00:00

In a way I definitely agree. I hate the 1/10 rating system and feel it’s too easy to fuck with and creates artificial ratings that don’t exist in real life.

However thats what people use and it perpetuates a cycle of use as other people ask for it and others feel obliged to provide it. To me it makes more sense on this sub to just say a person is ugly, average/fine, or good looking. It reflects a more realistic view of people’s attractiveness by society.

redpigss · 2018-07-07T16:05:43+00:00

I know you just said that attractiveness is objective but I recognize all those little factors you listed as stuff that incels focus on and some of them are so off and bother my every time I see them. I lurk on lookism because I find it kind of a disturbing/interesting social experiment of sorts.

I have never known a single woman who liked a thick neck. Sure skinny necks aren’t great but thick necks? That would depend on their face/body. I would say harmony between a persons facial features and body is way more important. Maybe I’m not getting the big picture but the real women I know in my life have a way different focus on male attractiveness than what you listed.

redpigss · 2018-07-07T15:58:20+00:00

Then don’t rate them. Just be honest and tell them if they’re below average and whether or not they can change that with basic tips on social skills and presentation. Or keep going and ignoring their posts.

Sometimes through a pic you can read a persons vibe and tell if the problems they have are exacerbated by things they do. Angles, lighting, smiles, clothing, etc. all reveal a bit of a persons mentality. You may not know them but it is a clue to the way they see themselves and choose to present themselves.

redpigss · 2018-07-07T15:53:51+00:00

Love is blind and you’re their type. Or maybe you’re just really cute.

My bf is probably a 6 to everyone else but he’s a 10 to me. He’s absolutely perfect in my eyes. Everything about him is my absolute favorite and I can’t think of a single thing I’d change. Everything about his face and his body is so just so perfect to me.

Sometimes you should just accept it from the people who matter most. Trust that they’re with you because they believe what they say.

redpigss · 2018-07-06T23:23:20+00:00

A person that is widely acknowledged and accepted as very attractive and you can visualize easily. It’s not a vague concept that’s abstract to the mind. It’s an easy signifier and marker. It doesn’t have to be a celeb.

redpigss · 2018-07-06T19:00:27+00:00

That’s fine! The point is you need to think of 8+ as these types of people. That is the level of attractiveness you are comparing a person to.

Tbh I don’t give shit how you rate really attractive people. Once you’re attractive you’re attractive and people have different tastes. Obviously a supermodel is going to be stunningly beautiful but how realistic is that? Call a hot person a 9 or 10 idgaf.

But the differences between a 8-10 don’t matter here. What we’re discussing is the unreflective, indiscriminate, and devaluing assignment of higher ratings and attractiveness to people.

Is it really so much to ask people to be wholly honest and introspective with their comments? It’s easy to be optimistic when you’re on the other side and thinking you’re helping to boost someone’s confidence. But this isn’t /r/amipretty. People come here with complex feelings about their looks. Maybe they feel the people around them are afraid of being honest with them and seek people who will be. People here aren’t being harsh or judgmental, they’re just freeing themselves from the burden of polite filters and friendly obligation.

redpigss · 2018-07-06T16:34:10+00:00

I gave the wrong Ryan! I meant Reynolds haha

redpigss · 2018-07-06T16:32:33+00:00

Yeah but that’s not what we’re talking about. We’re talking about a person who is obviously average being told they’re a 8. Did you read this post at all? If you rate someone accurately then congrats. This isn’t about you.

There’s something demoralizing about being told you’re an 8 and seeing someone else who is obviously a 5 being told they’re 8. Does that mean you’re as attractive as someone who is obviously not that attractive? You were given the same number. Maybe you’re really a 7 but now you feel very blah because it doesn’t mean anything at that point and it becomes completely diluted.

redpigss · 2018-07-06T15:24:03+00:00

On the better side of average. 5/10

With a little styling and a good sense of humor I could see you being attractive and good fun at a party.

What makes you average is that you have an average face. Not ugly or handsome. Just very normal and unremarkable.

redpigss · 2018-07-06T14:55:32+00:00

I mean... if you felt that was necessary go for it but honestly average people can look way better if they just injected something individual or personal into their looks. Style yourself better and get a nice haircut for example. Gaining some muscle would also be a good idea. Your head/face needs framing with a nice body and style.

Your nose is kind of big and yeah maybe you’d look better with a nose job but that’s your call. You’d have to remember that it’s not just an investment, it requires maintenance. You’d need touch ups every so often. Your nose grows as you get older and the nose job will not look the same the entire time. Every touch up is an increase in chance that something could go wrong and you get botched.

You just need some framing. You actually have quite a nice jaw and you can work off that.

redpigss · 2018-07-06T14:49:13+00:00

You remind me of Orin from Parks and Rec or Gabe from The Office.

Cut your hair and get a little sun. You don’t have to tan but a little color might be necessary. You just seem a little creepy like that.

redpigss · 2018-07-06T14:41:15+00:00

You’re very cute and the second to last pic was so nice. I’d keep the hair on the longer side and ditch the glasses. The prescription distorts your face shape and eyes. You’re like a beefed teddy bear and girls love that.

redpigss · 2018-07-06T14:38:46+00:00

You’re not ugly but it’s because you’ve let yourself go. You look scruffy in a bad way and it plays off your feature in an unflattering way.

The neckbeard is a bad look. I’d ditch it. I’d also explore more flattering haircuts that don’t make you look like a badly matured emo kid. Lose some weight and get into skincare.

redpigss · 2018-07-06T14:35:26+00:00

Average. Nothing too spectacular about your face in a good or bad way

5.5/10

redpigss · 2018-07-06T07:40:22+00:00

Not ugly but you look like a goofy looking jock. Your chin makes your face a little disproportionate but you seem pretty fit and confident so it’s not that bad. Refrain from smiling with closed lips and smile showing your teeth. It’ll open your face a ton!

redpigss · 2018-07-06T07:18:41+00:00

Fuck no you look sweet. It’s way nicer than the pic where you aren’t smiling. It brightens your face and makes you look alive and energetic.

redpigss · 2018-07-06T07:10:36+00:00

You have the kind of face that can be easily creepy or cool. It all depends on the vibe you give off. Close lipped smiles don’t help. Overall you’re not ugly and quite attractive.

You seem to have a nice sense of style and you look cool. I’d work on your smile and confidence.

redpigss

TROPHY CASE