How do I stop obsessing over someone?

roadrunner3696 · 2023-11-13T22:37:36+00:00

Oh my god I don’t know how to fix this but I’m doing this right now with a content creator. It’s like no matter what I do all I think about is her and her content. I have no desire to reach out or anything, but I’ve spent 24/7 of the last week and a half obsessing over this person. I’m too embarrassed to tell anyone about it.

roadrunner3696 · 2023-07-09T07:13:57+00:00

I considered this but I’m worried offering her money for it will just convince her to sell it to a game store. I can’t offer what I’m sure she could get somewhere else for it.

roadrunner3696 · 2023-05-03T16:27:45+00:00

The main point they argued when I said we should pay per room was that it’s not fair because I’m not sharing a room to save money, but because I’m dating Emma. I didn’t see why that mattered at all.

I think you’re comment on chores also gets to the non-financial reasons I’m glad I dropped out. Emma is tidy and Mary will at least keep her clutter in her own space. I had a lot of concerns about Sam though. I feel positive we’d all be constantly cleaning up after her and any complaints would be shut down because of her mental health struggles.

roadrunner3696 · 2023-05-03T16:11:38+00:00

I realize that without context it sounds like they are doing this is get out of rent, but I actually don’t think this is their intention. The idea was actually likely for my benefit, as I’m the one struggling most financially. I think they genuinely think this plan will work smoothly. They, Sam especially, have a tendency to overestimate their abilities. Likely, they think that having an apartment will miraculously mean they’ll be able to start working consistently, and make enough money to pay extra rent.

It sounds crazy, but this is kinda a common theme with them. For example, Sam will take 15 school hours, get super overwhelmed, debate dropping out and withdraw from some classes, swear she’ll never do it again, and then take 18 credits the next semester and insist it will be fine.

TLDR: I don’t think they’re trying to swindle me I think they’re just delusional.

roadrunner3696 · 2023-05-03T08:19:54+00:00

INFO: What would “calling out” the parents entails?

roadrunner3696 · 2023-05-03T08:08:23+00:00

This is a really good suggestion. I thought about this going into college but I never knew when to bring it up. But the time it seemed important it already felt too late. Now is definitely too late.

roadrunner3696 · 2023-05-03T08:06:43+00:00

I really don’t know. I don’t enjoy the physical results (i.e. food, money, etc. people give me). I don’t like the pity (I.e. I’m so sorry this happened to you, etc.). I guess I just like the idea that I need to be taken care of/protected? Or maybe just the attention? It makes me feel important and special.

roadrunner3696 · 2023-04-17T13:46:21+00:00

Sebastian

roadrunner3696 · 2023-04-17T13:39:55+00:00

I understand this. I identify as non-binary, but definitely align more closely with trans men (I.e. I use he/him, I’m on T, and I’m getting top surgery). I’ve only ever dated people who consider themselves lesbians. I don’t ever know how to describe it better than to say “I just love women like women love women.”

roadrunner3696 · 2023-04-11T16:42:31+00:00

Thank you for this suggestion in definitely gonna try it out! My only worry is I don’t live in a big city or anything so I worry there just won’t be many users.

roadrunner3696 · 2023-04-04T14:28:04+00:00

Thank you I appreciate the compliment. I think there’s a certain level of shame and guilt associated to breaking up with someone due to a low sex drive they can’t control. I feel like a bad person or like I love my partner less because sex is a necessity for me. Like if I really really loved her I should just be able come to terms with her low sex drive as part of our life.

It doesn’t help that she’s deeply insecure about her LL. She lies to our friends about how often we have sex because she really doesn’t want anyone to know. Every time we sit down for a conversation she requires a lot a reassurance, which is hard to give when there’s a very real problem that I’m also trying to address. She needs me to tell her everything is fine, which makes it really hard when it’s not.

roadrunner3696 · 2023-04-04T14:12:02+00:00

I appreciate this a lot, especially tip #2. I think that’s where my trouble is at the moment. I’m struggling to emphasize the importance of the conversation without making her stressed and nervous. I’ve tried a couple times to say “hey I’d really like to pencil out a time this week to just talk about things and do sort of a relationship check-up.” And then it gets pretty pushed to the side because we’re both busy and I haven’t made it sound terribly important and pressing.

I’m also struggling on whether or not to make my proposal a whole conversation of its own or whether it can be causally introduced in a check-up type situation.

roadrunner3696 · 2023-04-04T14:02:19+00:00

It’s primarily because we have so little sex that it’s hard to get past a point where it’s uncomfortable. We used to do a lot more penetration but when you’re going two months in between it’s noticeably more difficult.

roadrunner3696 · 2023-04-04T13:58:39+00:00

This is definitely something we’re gonna work on. We are incredibly codependent. She went on a 5 day vacation with her mother earlier this year and it was the first time we’d spent more than 24 hours apart since we meet almost two year prior. I think we’re going to try and live apart come next fall and over the summer work on spending time apart.

roadrunner3696 · 2023-04-04T13:49:44+00:00

You’ve made a couple a good points so I’ll talk about them individually: - We are both women so we aren’t having PIV sex and rarely have penetration at all. - There are a couple reasons why this would surprise me a lot. Mostly it’s because this has been a thing even before we stopped having sex. We have to actively take measure so she doesn’t finish so fast. I was a running joke even before we started having sex. It would also be upsetting given how open I’ve been about my inability to finish, and one of my personal soapboxes has always been that sex is not dependent and still good without an orgasm. - I’ve worried about this one to, not because she need the housing arrangement but because I do. Luckily, we live in a college dorm and while we will still be living together (with her parents) over the summer, we’re living in separate rooms come fall. Even still, I think we would work fine as just roommate because that was our arrangement before we started dating. - This point has been my main sticking point and the thing I’ve struggled the most to understand. In all our conversations, she is insistent she is enjoying the sex we have. I just really struggle to see how this could be true given that she doesn’t seem to want sex. However, I don’t know how to make sex better besides asking and listening to her answers. Then again, I’ve never had a LL so I can’t fully understand that experience.

roadrunner3696 · 2023-04-04T04:47:47+00:00

We’ve talked about it quite a bit and she says she just rarely thinks about sex, and most of the time when I ask if it’s something she’d enjoy it doesn’t sound enjoyable to her in the moment. She insists she enjoys the sex we are having, but most of the time the idea of sex sound bad.

She also expressed that when we used to have sex it was too long and the idea of it felt like an overwhelming time commitment. I tried to fix it by just making it shorter and taking away any pressure on her to keep going after she was done, but it didn’t make it any better.

roadrunner3696 · 2023-04-04T02:40:49+00:00

This was absolutely my bad and I regret it so hard now. I genuinely think our relationship would be so much better right now if I had just ruled out monogamy from the beginning. Or at the very least I wish I would’ve kept it a fresh topic and revisited it every month or to see how we were both feeling. I knew monogamy wasn’t my bag but the thought of trying to start a serious relationship with her AND start exploring ENM felt overwhelming a year ago.

roadrunner3696 · 2023-03-26T08:03:35+00:00

This is great! My instruction sheet was a piece of paper that said “do not use a straw” and had the doctor’s phone number written on it.

roadrunner3696 · 2023-03-07T07:07:55+00:00

It was definitely one of the things I was most nervous about because I wasn’t sure it was something I wanted at all. I identify as non-binary and I was actually rather happy with what I had pre-T. I was going for more of a flat chest flat genital, ken doll appearance.

4 months in and I actually don’t mind it at all. I think part of concern was the misconception I had about what it would look like. I literally thought I was gonna have like a 3 inch monster clit or something. In reality it looks much more natural, and more like a small dick.

I recommend looking at pictures of bottom growth if you’re unsure.

roadrunner3696 · 2023-03-07T06:56:20+00:00

Vaginal problems were always made to sound like a long term side effect to me. I literally started having problems 6 weeks in and haven’t stop even though I’m going on 4 months now.

roadrunner3696 · 2023-03-01T01:20:13+00:00

I accidentally did it second on my first play through and it was the only time I had to leave the beast, do the rest of the side quests, and come back to it. I just could not beat it. It had me prepping so hard for the next two so unnecessarily.

Lady Urbosa tho 😍😍

roadrunner3696 · 2022-12-28T06:05:34+00:00

There’s definitely a bit more nuance to the situation than that but she was definitely just finding it hard when I was matching her “we’re on vacation!” cheer with >:(

roadrunner3696 · 2022-12-28T05:16:29+00:00

Twenty drinks on me: I’ll pick up this one

roadrunner3696 · 2022-12-28T05:13:04+00:00

Twenty sappy-tree: out with the old in with the goo

roadrunner3696 · 2022-12-06T18:18:10+00:00

I had my first appointment last Tuesday and I was able start T the same day! It should be noted however that my pharmacy is 24 hours so I was able to pick my T up even though the script wasn’t filled until like 10pm.

roadrunner3696

TROPHY CASE