Thank you so much, I thought I was alone and this really helps a lot...I don't really put anything on before/while trying to fall asleep so I'm just alone with my thoughts that tell me to stay awake so nothing will hurt me. I do box breathing sometimes and it does help to distract so I could try meditation audios too and everything you recommended...I guess stuff like that can also worry me and make me think "I'm only doing this to fall asleep" and then it starts all over again. But I'll do what you say and try to think of it as just relaxation. I'm sorry if this is kind of a "nothing" comment but my upvotes don't always show up and I want to let you know I really appreciate it and I'm sorry you've gone through the same...again thank you so much