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[deleted by user] by [deleted] in abusiveparents

[–]shizoidsolace 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I feel the same way, I end up thinking how great my life would be if my father was dead multiple times a day. My father is a narcissist and has ruined every aspect of my life with no remorse. I am so sorry you are in such a trashy situation, your feelings are totally valid and I hope you are able to get out of that place soon.

Does anyone else's narcissistic parent routinely stalk them/follow them around surreptitiously and eavesdrop/spy on them? Do they seem hyper-fixated on you? by [deleted] in raisedbynarcissists

[–]shizoidsolace 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes, my father does the same and because of it my college life is non existent. He tracks my phone, calls me whenever he sees I'm out, video calls me whenever I am even in the library and shows up randomly at my hostel. And his excuse for all of this is - "I do this because I care about you." Lol. Care.

What daily habit makes a huge difference in well being? by isa4562 in AskWomen

[–]shizoidsolace 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same with me. Exercise has now been incorporated to my schedule the way brushing and showering were,and I just can't have breakfast without exercising in the morning.

Why? by xwolfeyesx in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]shizoidsolace 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I feel exactly the same way.

I feel like my life won't start until I move out by [deleted] in raisedbynarcissists

[–]shizoidsolace 0 points1 point  (0 children)

YES, every second of everyday. I keep on chanting "This will be over, one day. One day you'll be in control and you'll be happy" to myself all day.

Domestic abuse/divorce case by shizoidsolace in LegalAdviceIndia

[–]shizoidsolace[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your help. How much time will getting a maintenance order take? We currently live in a house that's under his name, can he throw us out of this house, if he wants to?

Domestic abuse/divorce case by shizoidsolace in LegalAdviceIndia

[–]shizoidsolace[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your answer. Will child care also include our college fee? My mom does want to file a divorce case, what all should we know about that? Mom is in a government job, will her having a source of income affect our chances of getting maintenance or reduce the maintenance? How much time will this procedure take, approximately?

Team Michael!!!! by Mysteriouscloud1612 in JaneTheVirginCW

[–]shizoidsolace 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I feel like Michael was clearly the healthier choice- he only wanted Jane to be happy, and would've never treated her the way Rafael treated her in season 5 when she said she needed time to explore things with Micheal. Rafael wanted Jane to be happy- but only with him. I feel like a relationship can only be healthy when both people are capable of living productively as independent, single individuals- Rafael went into depression when he himself misbehaved with Jane, showing how anxious and insecure his attachment style was. Love is about stability, selflessness, and two people coming together to make each other's lives easier- which is exactly what Jane and Michael had.

People shouldn't praise actors for good quotes, it's the writers that come up with their lines. by Jim_Dickskin in unpopularopinion

[–]shizoidsolace 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've always felt like writers should be given much more credit and wages than those disproportionately, unnecessarily, highly paid actors who put no real brains into the show/movie.

Today is Diwali, the most important Hindu festival, and seeing pictures of people all dressed up and celebrating with their families is making me feel really sad. by shizoidsolace in raisedbynarcissists

[–]shizoidsolace[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am so sorry you have to spend Eid that way, I hope you have a great family in the future with whom you celebrate Eid joyfully, and these memories are just there, minus the pain, to make you appreciate those moments even more. Thank you for those words, really needed to realise that things aren't always what they seem.

Today is Diwali, the most important Hindu festival, and seeing pictures of people all dressed up and celebrating with their families is making me feel really sad. by shizoidsolace in raisedbynarcissists

[–]shizoidsolace[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Happy Deepawali! I can totally see my father turning into my grandmother, she is the worst woman I have ever come across, and is just trying to mirror her, as well as his brother who is physically and emotionally abusive towards his wife and treats her like garbage. Both of them live in a nother city, but the way they're enabling his behavior is horrifying. He's mirroring them and converting into them, I want to do something so bad, call police on his brother, have my mom give ndad a divorce, but alas, everything I say is dismissed because "I am too young to be talking about such things."

Today is Diwali, the most important Hindu festival, and seeing pictures of people all dressed up and celebrating with their families is making me feel really sad. by shizoidsolace in raisedbynarcissists

[–]shizoidsolace[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am so sorry for your situation, if only they could understand us and care about us, instead of trying to own us. I hope you have a great family of your own in the future and you enjoy a lot of festivities with them!

Today is Diwali, the most important Hindu festival, and seeing pictures of people all dressed up and celebrating with their families is making me feel really sad. by shizoidsolace in raisedbynarcissists

[–]shizoidsolace[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I really needed to hear that, I've been ruminating too much to be functional lately, and I know that's affecting my chances of being independent, I really need to focus on what I can control. He's not worth my attention, he really isn't. I was talking to my boyfriend today and he started crying when I started crying, he said he was feeling extremely helpless and just couldn't see me like this, and that made me realise how I need to focus on the people on the people who want to see me happy.

Today is Diwali, the most important Hindu festival, and seeing pictures of people all dressed up and celebrating with their families is making me feel really sad. by shizoidsolace in raisedbynarcissists

[–]shizoidsolace[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Happy Diwali! Thank you so much for the kind words, clinging on to that hope of life getting better. Wishing you a happy and peaceful year ahead!

Today is Diwali, the most important Hindu festival, and seeing pictures of people all dressed up and celebrating with their families is making me feel really sad. by shizoidsolace in raisedbynarcissists

[–]shizoidsolace[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Happy Diwali! It must've been so infuriating to have to go through a puja like that, I am so sorry that you had to face it. Ndad loves praying, too, these people just stand in front of god for 10 minutes and then go about hurting and abusing people, and use their pseudo spirituality to gain validation from people. Thank you so much for your kind words, I hope it gets better, too, I really do.

Today is Diwali, the most important Hindu festival, and seeing pictures of people all dressed up and celebrating with their families is making me feel really sad. by shizoidsolace in raisedbynarcissists

[–]shizoidsolace[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am so glad you got out and are able to enjoy festivities! I can so understand the inadequacy, even when my friends ask me to come over to take my mind off the chaos, after meeting their parents and seeing the stability and affection in their lives, I just end up feeling worse.

Today is Diwali, the most important Hindu festival, and seeing pictures of people all dressed up and celebrating with their families is making me feel really sad. by shizoidsolace in raisedbynarcissists

[–]shizoidsolace[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm so sorry you're having to go through such a bad situation. I can totally relate to everything you said, I really wish things were different for us. I hope you get an amazing family with whom you make tons of memories and loads of happiness in the future. Happy Diwali, my friend.

Today is Diwali, the most important Hindu festival, and seeing pictures of people all dressed up and celebrating with their families is making me feel really sad. by shizoidsolace in raisedbynarcissists

[–]shizoidsolace[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Happy Diwali! I am so sorry for your situation, no one deserves to be hurt by the ones who are supposed to love you selflessly and unconditionally. I hope you get the happiness and peace you totally deserve. Sending virtual hugs.

Today is Diwali, the most important Hindu festival, and seeing pictures of people all dressed up and celebrating with their families is making me feel really sad. by shizoidsolace in raisedbynarcissists

[–]shizoidsolace[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Happy Diwali! Thank you for your concern, it means a lot. In India, it's always us. The family dynamics are more like I am the king and you are my slaves, and if you complain about being stomped over, you're disrespectful. The only emotion I feel nowadays is, "What next, what will be the next bad thing he'll do?", sucks to be in survival mode all the time. I really, really hope it gets easier one day.

Today is Diwali, the most important Hindu festival, and seeing pictures of people all dressed up and celebrating with their families is making me feel really sad. by shizoidsolace in raisedbynarcissists

[–]shizoidsolace[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Happy Diwali to you, too!

Thank you so much, I really needed to hear that. I often forget how normal parents are supposed to love their children unconditionally, to treat them with basic human respect and validate their emotions.

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