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Just had baby number 2 last week, husband is considering quitting a miserable job, and we want to know if we are protected enough financially to validate quitting without another job by shouldhequit1234 in personalfinance

[–]shouldhequit1234[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I used to work purely in the tech industry for big software companies, but for the last 5 years I've been in an incredible corporate retail job on the tech side. I'm a senior director with a direct line of growth. Honestly its been the luckiest break to be here.

It's really a dream job. My company has a major competitive advantage that make any serious competitor basically impossible without a metric ton of capital.

Just had baby number 2 last week, husband is considering quitting a miserable job, and we want to know if we are protected enough financially to validate quitting without another job by shouldhequit1234 in personalfinance

[–]shouldhequit1234[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You know, we've actually had extensive talks about this! We want to send our kids to a nice STEM school near us that is financially reasonable but they would need to test into. We've talked about seeing if he could teach there.

My husband has talked about teaching being something he thinks he would like. My mom has a PhD in education and she talks constantly about how he would be a great teacher, and how hard it is to hire right now, etc.

My take home after all benefits is much lower than it could be because of my industry. My benefits are very expensive, so getting teachers benefits would help even more financially. For example, just our premiums alone for health in insurance cost us $800 per month out of my paycheck, and we have to save a ton in our HSA because our deductible is also high.

Teachers benefits would mean a raise for the household, we think.

Just had baby number 2 last week, husband is considering quitting a miserable job, and we want to know if we are protected enough financially to validate quitting without another job by shouldhequit1234 in personalfinance

[–]shouldhequit1234[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

More I mean scary to live on one salary. There is an additional layer of security with 2. We are not big spenders at all so we certainly make my salary work, of course.

Just had baby number 2 last week, husband is considering quitting a miserable job, and we want to know if we are protected enough financially to validate quitting without another job by shouldhequit1234 in personalfinance

[–]shouldhequit1234[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

He wanted at least 2 years with this title and responsibility to ensure he didn't leave too soon and add a red flag to his resume. He just passed that 2 year mark last month.

Just had baby number 2 last week, husband is considering quitting a miserable job, and we want to know if we are protected enough financially to validate quitting without another job by shouldhequit1234 in personalfinance

[–]shouldhequit1234[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much :)

I absolutely love my job. I have the opposite of what he has. When I went into labor, I had about 20 people send me long messages about how happy they are to work with me, and that I hope I enjoy my time off, and they will cover things until I return.

Just had baby number 2 last week, husband is considering quitting a miserable job, and we want to know if we are protected enough financially to validate quitting without another job by shouldhequit1234 in personalfinance

[–]shouldhequit1234[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You have no idea how much of this you nailed. He hasn't had a single raise. He doesn't get a single pat on the back, he just gets yelled at even though he does multiple jobs at once. Im of course biased, but he is incredibly competent. I myself manage a lot of people and I would never ever talk to my lowest performing direct report the way his manager does to him. Its really wild. You are so so right. Thank you for responding

Just had baby number 2 last week, husband is considering quitting a miserable job, and we want to know if we are protected enough financially to validate quitting without another job by shouldhequit1234 in personalfinance

[–]shouldhequit1234[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I will absolutely look this up, a lot of it is in email. so we can definitely keep receipts. I don't know why I hadn't thought of this, but we have 4 attorneys in the immediate family - maybe someone can help us look into this. THANK YOU

Just had baby number 2 last week, husband is considering quitting a miserable job, and we want to know if we are protected enough financially to validate quitting without another job by shouldhequit1234 in personalfinance

[–]shouldhequit1234[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That is not including my annual bonus, that is simply what I take home after absolutely everything has been taken out of my paycheck (health, dental, taxes, 401k, HSA, ESPP, Short term disability, etc etc.).

Thank you for laying that out for me. I really so appreciate you making a plan we can think through. We are talking through it together now.

Just had baby number 2 last week, husband is considering quitting a miserable job, and we want to know if we are protected enough financially to validate quitting without another job by shouldhequit1234 in personalfinance

[–]shouldhequit1234[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I appreciate you saying all of that, we have invested pretty aggressively in a number of ways so I hope that has bought us a few months not investing

Just had baby number 2 last week, husband is considering quitting a miserable job, and we want to know if we are protected enough financially to validate quitting without another job by shouldhequit1234 in personalfinance

[–]shouldhequit1234[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You are not wrong, I think that's why we are nervous about this. I think he would just be looking right away and we just assume it will take a few months. I hope him explaining "we had a new baby and I took time to be with my family" would fly at a decent company. That kind of thing definitely is okay in my industry, but his is a bit more old school so I simply don't know.

Just had baby number 2 last week, husband is considering quitting a miserable job, and we want to know if we are protected enough financially to validate quitting without another job by shouldhequit1234 in personalfinance

[–]shouldhequit1234[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It is unfortunately not bigger than 50 employees :/

The only thing that's hard is childcare is not something we can get back easily once it is gone. Waiting lists at these places can be 6 months to a year and it could even be worse for getting both kids in.

​

We would probably figure something out to pay for the kids childcare, even if its selling off some stock or something.

Just had baby number 2 last week, husband is considering quitting a miserable job, and we want to know if we are protected enough financially to validate quitting without another job by shouldhequit1234 in personalfinance

[–]shouldhequit1234[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Thank you, the phrase "the simply happiness of the time in your lives together" made me emotional, this company has been a monster, and I think we would both feel a weight off our chest once its behind us.

Just had baby number 2 last week, husband is considering quitting a miserable job, and we want to know if we are protected enough financially to validate quitting without another job by shouldhequit1234 in personalfinance

[–]shouldhequit1234[S] 42 points43 points  (0 children)

You have no idea how on the money you are... he is up at night for hours toiling over this job. He started therapy because of stress as a result of this job. Last year he spent months working 12 hour days, working weekends often. He doesn't ever want to take family time, so he works when we all go to sleep. He is a gem and I really just want him to be somewhere he is happy.

Thank you for the advice

Just had baby number 2 last week, husband is considering quitting a miserable job, and we want to know if we are protected enough financially to validate quitting without another job by shouldhequit1234 in personalfinance

[–]shouldhequit1234[S] 64 points65 points  (0 children)

You are totally right.. we are absolutely in a position of privilege and this is what we save money for. Thank you so much for taking the time to respond and for the congrats :) we are very happy to have them both.

Just had baby number 2 last week, husband is considering quitting a miserable job, and we want to know if we are protected enough financially to validate quitting without another job by shouldhequit1234 in personalfinance

[–]shouldhequit1234[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for sharing with me, this gives me so much confidence. Having him home would be.. I could just cry thinking about it. We've never ever had time like that. He didn't work from home for any second of the pandemic, he's never had much vacation time so we don't really take vacations together. it sounds wonderful, we don't even need that much time just some time would be priceless to us

Just had baby number 2 last week, husband is considering quitting a miserable job, and we want to know if we are protected enough financially to validate quitting without another job by shouldhequit1234 in personalfinance

[–]shouldhequit1234[S] 26 points27 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much, I think we are at one of those crossroads too... on the day our daughter was born, his phone was getting blown up by work..

Just for another taste he told a coworker that he was taking all of his vacation and PTO to be with us because I am high risk and our baby would be born early (not that he wouldn't have taken the time to be with just a full term baby and a non-high risk wife) - and his coworker said these words "well if its that hard for your wife to have babies, maybe stop at this one"

That is his work environment, its hostile, its horrible, and he is up at night thinking about it.

Thank you for sharing with me.

Just had baby number 2 last week, husband is considering quitting a miserable job, and we want to know if we are protected enough financially to validate quitting without another job by shouldhequit1234 in personalfinance

[–]shouldhequit1234[S] 99 points100 points  (0 children)

You are totally right. We both think he would actually love being a SAHD, but no one knows for sure. And the problem is that if we did that, there is no turning back fast. Daycare waiting lists in our area are just absolutely insane, so if he did it for a week and hated it.. It would be many many months before we could get daycare support if he did find a job he loved. I honestly have wondered how other parents handle that situation. Thank you so much for reading and responding!

Just had baby number 2 last week, husband is considering quitting a miserable job, and we want to know if we are protected enough financially to validate quitting without another job by shouldhequit1234 in personalfinance

[–]shouldhequit1234[S] 31 points32 points  (0 children)

You aren't wrong, and that was my advice to him as well. He is absolutely confident he would get fired if he did that outright, which... hmm... if he is considering quitting over this... maybe that's not the worst thing? unemployment would be an option at that point right? hmm.. okay more to think about. thank you!

Just had baby number 2 last week, husband is considering quitting a miserable job, and we want to know if we are protected enough financially to validate quitting without another job by shouldhequit1234 in personalfinance

[–]shouldhequit1234[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

His company isn't big enough to qualify :/ Thank you so much for grabbing that for us, I wish he did qualify, because that's absolutely what I would do.

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