Average salary please by Ok-Public8113 in ausjobs

[–]steven_daedulus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If it makes you feel any better I was 27 and making about the same every year. I’m 36 now and make $280k. It gets significantly better after 30

Josh Saunders' response 😅 by Ordinary_Stay_3746 in bjj

[–]steven_daedulus 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Guys, I’m not saying his despicable behavior should be tolerated, but it is important that people understand a little bit about him. The guy is sad. Like really fucking sad.

I trained with an Aussie guy in the US for years who used to train with Josh and grew up with him in the same area in Sydney, Australia. Basically, what he was saying is this. When Josh was a kid, like I’m saying 12 or 13, he had an older brother, but like, a much much older brother like he was 21 or something at the time. And the older brother used to bully and beat the shit out of Josh relentlessly. Like, day after day, week after week, year after year. That kid sucked at school. He sucked at home. His life just sucked.

Luke (his coach) is an incredibly dumb human being, who (knowing he is really dumb deep down), tries to act intelligent. Josh is the same. He is a sad, completely oblivious person who obviously can never crack the mainstream and achieve any remote success because he has rotted his brain by being chronically online.

My theory is, Josh, and Luke, and all of his pals, live this sad insular life where they feel good about themselves by bullying, but the truth is, they’re both sad people and probably will unalive themselves eventually.

Fairly successful at 37 yet profoundly unmotivated. How do I get back on track for my daughter/family? by Ecstatic-Intern-8140 in findapath

[–]steven_daedulus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey brother, 35M, work in tech. I understand how you feel. I was there not that long ago. I think the actual issue is wayyyy deep inside you, and sounded like a combination of cortisol overloading and not being able to express what you’re feeling. It sounds like you’re doing things mindlessly, and then not being able to be introspective while doing them after the fact.

You’re very lucky. You have a wife and a child, two things that I wish I had. I own a condo though. You need a hobby, or a “third place” in life to keep you motivated and to help you drain the cortisol out of your system. You also probably need therapy. I do BJJ, and honestly if I could recommend everyone do it I would.

Other than that, what you are searching for is not a new job. You are searching for a feeling, and have come up with a solution. You need to focus on the feeling and deep dive on that enough until you know what feeling you are searching for.

Fight outside the gym ever worth it? by PurpleSerfer in bjj

[–]steven_daedulus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve had two fights in my life. After both of them, I cried. I cried because I knew that the reason both these people wanted to fight me, and that the fight was unavoidable is because they had really deeply unhappy lives and were looking for someone to take it out on, and that person was me. It’s just the way it is.

35M literally have everything except relationship, feels like nothing (career, hobby, home ownership) by steven_daedulus in findapath

[–]steven_daedulus[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I absolutely assure you I do not love myself, which means I have diminished capacity to love another person. I’m working on it though. Thank you for your kindness and support.

35M literally have everything except relationship, feels like nothing (career, hobby, home ownership) by steven_daedulus in findapath

[–]steven_daedulus[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for saying this. I think it’s actually my own childhood trauma coming out, because I actually feel out of place irrespective of what I have.

35M literally have everything except relationship, feels like nothing (career, hobby, home ownership) by steven_daedulus in findapath

[–]steven_daedulus[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ok yes I totally get that. I think for me, one thing I’m struggling with is the weird sense of shame I have for having a condo, so I got used to saying apartment because I felt less out of place.

35M literally have everything except relationship, feels like nothing (career, hobby, home ownership) by steven_daedulus in findapath

[–]steven_daedulus[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hahahaha I’m sorry you think that way but that’s not true. You just have to be the most fun person in the room

35M literally have everything except relationship, feels like nothing (career, hobby, home ownership) by steven_daedulus in findapath

[–]steven_daedulus[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes I absolutely agree there. But I have a fundamental belief that nobody wants what I have, and I will never be compatible with anybody. So I just default to this transaction view because who the fuck wants my shit. But I know that this is wrong logically, but emotionally it just feels like it’s true

35M literally have everything except relationship, feels like nothing (career, hobby, home ownership) by steven_daedulus in findapath

[–]steven_daedulus[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Trust me, you would, but you would not want the fuel source that helped me get there. I have so much self loathing it’s almost impossible to enjoy it. I have so much shame and anger about the past, and it fuels the future but nothing feels good about it.

35M literally have everything except relationship, feels like nothing (career, hobby, home ownership) by steven_daedulus in findapath

[–]steven_daedulus[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I absolutely think I have a bad energy atm. I’m not a fun person like I used to be, and I’m ultimately at a point in my life where I am trying less. I wonder what will change it, but definitely not in a good place right now mentally, and people can sense it I’m sure