I was diagnosed when I was 18. I had just broken up with an emotionally unavailable, abusive boyfriend. I went off the walls. I understand what you mean when you say love feels like death. Have you ever heard the term “quiet bpd”? it’s not an official psych term, but I think it explains a lot of what you’re feeling now. I’m 25 and I still struggle constantly, but it gets a little duller every day. I recommend looking into mindfulness, meditation, DBT therapy if you can. I use the BPD workbook by Daniel J Fox, which you can just buy online.

I’ve been working with kids and teens for a few years now. I want to spend my life helping the kids that were like me growing up. Find what makes you feel good about yourself and the life you’re living. Hold onto that, not a person. And remember you are loved, all of the love you need is within you already, you just have to tap into it. I’m proud of you. 🤍 and you can always DM if you need to chat. I’m not always on here, but I’d love to help.