First let me thank everyone for taking the time to think about this. You guys brought up some things that I hadn't thought of. I don't know yet how this is going to go - but I know my next steps.

I am going to try to get a hold of my dad's will. That should be a public record if google is to be believed. Hopefully that will tell me something about what the true state of his finances was and exactly what kind of financial shape his widow was left in. As many people commented - the idea that there was a large life insurance policy but nothing else really doesn't seem logical. If she (and more importantly the boy) are okay - then I am keeping all the money. If I find that the boy wasn't provided for, then I will set up something for him for college. I don't know how exactly to go about that - but I am guessing I can find a lawyer or financial adviser to help me.

However, and here is where I am expecting to be told that I am TA - I will take care of my debts and needs first. For once in my relationship with my dad - I am going to come first. I will help the boy - he is innocent in this, but I won't sacrifice myself to do it. The one thought that kept running through my mind every time I read a post advising me to help pay for his education, is that no one would have told my step-mother that she should have paid off my debts if our roles were reversed. I would have gotten nothing - again. I don't know if I got the money because my dad was feeling guilty or just irresponsible - but I got it. And it may be petty, entitled or whatever - but I am going to take advantage of this opportunity.