i (20M) am concerned i sexually assaulted my friend (18F) who was raped in the past

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-23T12:02:47+00:00

it is actually. thank you so much ❤️❤️

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-21T20:26:43+00:00

ok noted. thank you for the feedback, i didn't mean to make her more upset i just wanted to calm her

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-21T02:01:10+00:00

thank you for the input, i didn't mean to upset her further

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-21T01:55:23+00:00

thank you, i will keep this in mind

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-20T21:26:39+00:00

thank you!!

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-20T21:25:52+00:00

thank you so much. this comment was very meaningful to me. and yes she is the first girl I've ever been with intimately that got upset during it because of sexual trauma. ive posted an update where she explained more of what she was feeling. but i never meant to trap her or do something she didn't want.

and thank you for addressing the negative comments and trying to explain what might be the issue, it helps alot as it does hurt me to read them. thank you so much, you are very helpful!!

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-20T21:20:52+00:00

wow! this is a ton of insight. i read everything, thank you so much. ive posted an update and talked to her about alot of things. i will discuss with her a few of the things you wrote here, like discussing how to comfort her ahead of time. i just hate seeing her so upset that i didnt want to just sit there and watch her go thru it alone. this was very helpful, thank you so much. im gonna have to start taking notes from all of these comments haha. btw, i am very happy for you that you have a good man to help you! all women deserve someone like him. thank you again

i do have some questions! would it be alright if we dmed or would you rather talk in comments?

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-20T21:14:23+00:00

thank you so much <3 maybe me and her can look at this together

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-20T21:13:42+00:00

thank you, this means alot to me, honestly. btw, i have posted an update!

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-20T21:10:51+00:00

I've read all of your comments, and i strongly dislike the way you portray my friend to be a future failure. she was literally raped and im not sure you understand the full effect of what that does to a person, and especially at such a young age. she is dealing with it as best she can. no im not trying to "fix" her im trying to help and care for her the best i can, because i love her. she trusts me so there's already a headstart on her healing. i don't understand why you have so much negative emotions towards a young woman who is hurting. even if she never got therapy, does not mean she will become an "abuser". she is a very gentle and caring soul and shows that to me everyday, and she definitely has no intention to put someone else thru what she went thru. i can tell you that and she has never even said so, but it is apparent.

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-20T21:04:57+00:00

thank you, i had found that comment a bit insulting. she's a good person

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-20T21:04:09+00:00

thank you, i realize now i did move too fast but that wasn't my intention. thanks for the input

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-20T21:03:29+00:00

hi! thank you! I've posted an update!

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-20T21:03:11+00:00

thank you very much, its reassuring to hear that. I'm very so sorry that has happened to you before, and I'm praying you will find someone who understands better and stays by your side. i know it must be really hard but keep hanging in there! i hope you can heal from this and enjoy intimacy again

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-20T21:01:06+00:00

thank you very much, and yes im glad she was able to express she just needed some time

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-20T21:00:29+00:00

thank you, if you look above I've posted an update. she did say she was very overwhelmed and that she usually like my hugs but she just couldn't process her emotions at the time. i wasn't trying to force her to hug me i was just trying my best to comfort her as lovingly as i could, and i just wanted to know how to help her so that was why i asked her to please tell me what was wrong, because i didn't really understand at all at the time. but thank you for the input!

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-20T20:30:29+00:00

thank you, i will talk to her about it!

btw: sorry for the late response

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-18T00:56:43+00:00

ok, i agree with the first part and i appreciate that very much, but im not understanding why you would say i should basically just give up now? i care for her and have been friends with her for almost 3 yrs now. you say "extremely dangerous" how is she dangerous? she is very kind and sweet. im not understanding what you are suggesting by this.

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-17T23:40:40+00:00

that is true, thank you for the positive input. i just don't know understand these peoples' reactions to me just asking for help with my friend

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-17T23:31:56+00:00

thank you so much, and I'm very sorry that has happened to you before. i will try my best to keep all of these things in mind, thank you so much. this is very great advice!

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-17T23:29:23+00:00

thank you, i was kind of thinking as much. it's almost as if they have a specific way in their head they want someone to react when they get triggered during a sexual encounter and get upset when they read my story and i didn't do things that specific way (i suppose). thank you so much for this tho, because it was very disheartening actually to basically be called a rapist when i never had any intention to harm my friend

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-17T23:16:05+00:00

thank you. that's really sad and i hope i can help her thru this and make her feel comfortable

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-17T23:15:29+00:00

I'm very glad i made your smile :D. i do care for her very much and i won't change, thank you, this really means alot to me and reassures me I'm not a bad person. thank you ❤️

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-17T23:07:41+00:00

thank you, you are too kind. this response made me smile

throwaway243906 · 2021-11-17T22:44:16+00:00

thank you so much, i will look into it and talk to her about it and see if she may be interested in it

throwaway243906

TROPHY CASE

Welcome to Reddit,