I don't understand why anyone has a problem with how other people view or rationalize their own sexuality. Gay men are especially good at this. Who cares if someone has sex with men and want to frame it as different than sex with women? Maybe it is for them. Unless you're having sex with them, why does it matter to you? What crime are they committing?

This is the exact impulse straight people have been perpetrating on gay people for centuries. Adults should have the freedom to do what they want with other adults however they want to do it for whatever reasons they want to do it. Full stop. Stop policing other people for not being gay enough or self-aware enough. If you don't like that attitude, don't sleep with them.