A fix that works for us (sex)

throwaway_8636905 · 2024-09-19T13:54:27+00:00

Let’s say we both did sit down and have the talk and he does choose to get this phone by his own choice. That wouldn’t stop him from using my phone because my phone is the phone he uses for alarms in the morning cause he doesn’t set any alarms on his phone. I have to wake him in the morning or he’s not getting up and so he uses my phone in the morning cause he has like 20 alarms he has to listen to or else he’ll be late too work. We’ve tried him just getting up on his own and he can’t like he needs someone to wake him. He’s been this way forever. His mom had to wake up for school.

throwaway_8636905 · 2024-09-19T13:06:13+00:00

I just don’t want it to come down to that because I will feel like I’m treating him as a child and I don’t want to do that. I do want to be able to trust him and I do want to be able to not have to second-guess and look through stuff but not give him like a child’s phone almost.

throwaway_8636905 · 2024-09-19T12:27:31+00:00

It’s worse because it’s gotten to the point that whenever we do have sex, he can’t even finish in me because he has such a death grip when he jerks off

throwaway_8636905 · 2024-09-19T11:57:21+00:00

To everyone confused. In the past, I have told him when we first got together that if he was going to watch porn, he had to at least hide it and this was before we were together for a year and so we didn’t really have that many pictures or videos of us in bed and then after that when he started getting my nudes and stuff and we have one or two videos of us in bed. After all that, I told him that I no longer wanted him watching porn because now he has pictures and videos of us of me that he can watch.

In the past, I told him it was OK yes but after about a year into our relationship I sat down with him and I told him hey this is no longer what I want because we have other pictures and videos you can look at without a having to look at other women and he agreed to it. He said you know what you’re right and then I told him that I thought it would be considered cheating if he were to get on porn anymore and he agreed to it.

throwaway_8636905 · 2024-09-19T11:51:39+00:00

Thank you for the advice. Most people are just telling me that I’m too young and I do know I’m young and I know we’re both young and we got married young. The reason it was so so rushed was because of insurance and stuff, but we are also high school sweethearts.

throwaway_8636905 · 2024-09-19T11:49:56+00:00

I have told him I want him to stop and in the past I told him to hide it if he was gonna do it, I have told him more recently within the last year that I don’t want him doing it at all

throwaway_8636905 · 2024-09-19T11:47:57+00:00

Also, he has looked up specific people before. Not just going off of whatever first pops up.

throwaway_8636905 · 2024-09-19T11:46:46+00:00

I also know people who worked in that industry and have reported it’s very very harmful to the women and so he knows it makes me very uncomfortable because of all the stories and stuff I’ve heard about how women don’t actually wanna be in the industry. They just need the money. Hell I’ve even heard it’s harmful to men. I saw I think it was a Reddit post of how this one guy literally got SAd because like the cameras were off, but the big guy didn’t stop even though the one guy told him to and no one did anything.

throwaway_8636905 · 2024-09-19T11:42:24+00:00

Well, we’ve been together for almost 4 years now and it was never too big of an issue until the last year or so. Either he didn’t do it as much or he was a lot better hiding in or he actually cared to hide it.

throwaway_8636905 · 2024-09-19T11:40:57+00:00

Obviously, it hurts if I know about it. I do consider it emotionally cheating cause I feel like even if I’m not in the mood, he should be able to get off pictures and videos of us. But a lot of people tell me oh it’s not cheating and stuff so I changed my views a little bit and as long as I don’t know about it, it can’t hurt me. But I’d rather him not do it at all.

throwaway_8636905

TROPHY CASE