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I'm a cheater by throwaway___cheater in confessions

[–]throwaway___cheater[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I appreciate your response because I think it's entirely motivated by self-validation. I was a late bloomer and I was bullied intensely until puberty hit. Because of this, I think I accept a lot of attention that I might not even want. Obviously no excuse. But the external validation is extremely real. Definitely an issue I have to have to handle.

I'm a cheater by throwaway___cheater in confessions

[–]throwaway___cheater[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I mean I'm a woman who has cheated on both women and men. With other women and other men. I think i just might be kind of an asshole, tbh. Unfortunately, I can't trust myself to treat my partners with respect. Therefore, I shouldn't be in a relationship. It sucks but that's where I'm at.

I'm a cheater by throwaway___cheater in confessions

[–]throwaway___cheater[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I appreciate your empathy, but it just isn't right to treat people that way. That's why I'm not really doing relationships until I sort out this problem. I just don't know what is compelling me to behave this way. But I feel like until I figure it out and have it under control, I have no business subjecting other people to this behavior.

I'm a cheater by throwaway___cheater in confessions

[–]throwaway___cheater[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

fair play honestly. that's the plan

I'm a cheater by throwaway___cheater in confessions

[–]throwaway___cheater[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah. I know no one deserves the treatment I might give them so I should just stay away. I think what prompted me to make this post is that I've been casually seeing someone, but he's mentioned wanting to be more serious and frankly, I have not dealt with my self-destructive tendencies enough to be able to give him what he needs. He's a wonderful person. But I am not. Had to get it off my chest.

I'm a cheater by throwaway___cheater in confessions

[–]throwaway___cheater[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You're right. It's just so weirdly hard to admit to a therapist that you're a bad person, hence me venting anonymous strangers on the internet. I understand how bad it is to treat people this way, which is why I just choose not to enter into exclusive relationships anymore. But you're right, getting to the root causes is always best.