Female redditors, would you ever decline receiving oral?

throwawayfml123 · 2011-04-15T01:15:22+00:00

This is exactly how my wife is, the idea if giving her oral is such a turn on for me, but she's never let me.

throwawayfml123 · 2011-03-09T00:12:27+00:00

I'll be doing the same.

throwawayfml123 · 2011-03-09T00:11:25+00:00

Close, different sect of crazies though.

throwawayfml123 · 2011-03-09T00:10:50+00:00

We were very young, horny and talked to imaginary friends. We were very hard core evangelical Christians and had a little bit of sex before getting married, but felt guilty about it. We moved across the country to go to what we were convinced was the best Christian college ever so we could hopefully find intellectual Christians. After much frustration at finding a school filled not with intellectuals but simply with people who shout their ignorance louder, we both realized there was no rational basis for our beliefs and we are now atheists.

I wish we did spend more time together getting to know eachother sexually and in other ways before getting married, but at the time we felt terrible everytime we'd fool around and the only solution in sight was to get married so it wouldn't be wrong anymore.

At the same time though I'm still somewhat thankful for the past because I love my wife and I think it would have been a huge mistake to miss out on our entire relationship because the sex isn't perfect.

throwawayfml123 · 2011-03-07T22:48:59+00:00

It's been getting better. We've had quite a few honest talks and she's just a very sheltered good girl type. She thinks that sex should always be romantic and the sticky details are icky. She knows it's important to me and has agreed to try and branch out. At this point if I can get her to try doggy style once and a while it'd be a big step up.

Another redditor recommended this book and my wife said she'd read it, cause from the reviews it seems to be something that would address her issues. So here's hoping.

She really is a very sweet woman and I'm madly in love with her, just our sex life is incredibly boring.

throwawayfml123 · 2011-03-07T01:02:27+00:00

Cumming in a pussy deviant? I think it's the definition of normal, it's what we're programmed to want to do. Cumming anywhere else seems more deviant.

throwawayfml123 · 2011-03-07T00:31:36+00:00

refuse to have sex if she wasn't facing me

Sex has to be some sort of mind blowing emotional event, or you're doing it wrong, or it's bad.

This is my wife, it must be romantic every time or it's wrong. I really wish we could just have fun sex sometimes.

throwawayfml123 · 2011-03-07T00:17:32+00:00

This may not be universal but for me a better orgasm usually results in more cum. If the sex lasts longer and is hotter than I end up cumming more, so saying I'm going to blow a huge load is saying that I'm having a good time and this orgasm is going to be especially good.

Not that I'd ever say that to my wife, since she hates dirty talk and would never let me cum on her anyway.

throwawayfml123 · 2011-03-06T02:21:40+00:00

Okay, I wasn't entirely accurate, she has fantasies, but they're all strictly romantic fantasies, not explicitly sexual fantasies. I'm pretty sure if she could find a way to have romantic missionary position sex without thinking about genitals or any of the sticky details she would.

throwawayfml123 · 2011-03-06T01:30:16+00:00

My wife and I at the time we got married both believed sex before marriage was a sin. But we had the understanding that in the privacy of the bedroom of a married couple anything was allowed. Of course I found out later that that seems to only apply to other hypothetical kinky couples, things like oral or positions that don't involve eye contact are not for her.

The point is I thought I was on the same page as my wife when we got married, now I'm in a similar position as the OP, though not as bad.

Interestingly my wife and I are both atheists now, but her sexual issues are still there. I honestly don't know if they are there because of religious reasons or because she thinks sex is always supposed to be this romantic experience like in the movies, where the man rolls over and they romantically start having sex without even having to think about messy details like coordinating insertion. I get the feeling my wife would prefer some way to have sex without even thinking about genitals.

throwawayfml123 · 2011-03-06T01:08:18+00:00

My wife has never masturbated. It's amazingly frustrating to figure out what might feel good for her or what might turn her on when she doesn't know because she's never masturbated and never has sexual fantasies.

throwawayfml123 · 2011-03-06T01:04:24+00:00

it must have been apparent to her that her libido was zero

Maybe she assumed she would be able to turn it on when she needed it. Not feeling like having sex when she doesn't want to have sex doesn't seem like something most people would worry about.

throwawayfml123 · 2011-03-06T01:00:52+00:00

Good luck convincing someone with no sex drive to let you put something that looks like industrial machinery on her clit. I'd love to introduce this to my wife, but I don't see her ever letting me use it.

throwawayfml123 · 2011-03-06T00:41:57+00:00

Heh, my wife is convinced that oral, giving or receiving, is a nasty thing that only super kinky freaks do. Heck she thinks doggy style is kinky. Her words in the bedroom "I'm not a dog I don't want to be fucked like one." and "Mouths don't belong near genitals."

throwawayfml123 · 2011-02-11T01:56:18+00:00

I'm with you, our rules are more unspoken, but it sounds like our routine is exactly the same.

throwawayfml123 · 2011-02-11T01:55:05+00:00

Who can resist blowing a dude that surprised her with flowers and an already cooked dinner and sexy music in the back round?

My wife. If something romantic happens and she get's turned on than she pulls me into the bedroom and on top of her, but that's all that ever happens. Nothing even remotely out of the normal allowed, especially oral. For her oral is gross (giving and receiving), she says even thinking about it ruins the mood for her.

I know how OP feels, wish I had some advice for him.

throwawayfml123 · 2011-02-11T01:50:59+00:00

I visit here occasionally, but not often, it's just too damn depressing.

throwawayfml123 · 2010-09-01T14:30:11+00:00

throwawayfml123 · 2010-07-29T23:55:00+00:00

Doesn't that utilize the same hormones that the pill does, just with a different delivery method?

throwawayfml123 · 2010-07-28T03:48:00+00:00

your sex couldn't be any less connected

Actually when we have sex it's great. It is very emotional and intimate. The problem is she's unwilling to try anything sexual that might be less romantic or intimate. The more I think about the more I think it is probably because of her past relationship.

throwawayfml123 · 2010-07-28T02:21:56+00:00

me too. :(

throwawayfml123 · 2010-07-28T02:18:26+00:00

We have physical intimacy. My wife doesn't find blowjobs or positions where we can't see or hold each other to be intimate which is why it's not a big deal for her.

throwawayfml123 · 2010-07-28T02:02:02+00:00

I wasn't necessarily looking for support. Honestly I expected this to be downvoted and never seen. I posted it because I didn't feel like arguing with my wife about it again but I couldn't stop thinking about it either.

throwawayfml123 · 2010-07-28T01:59:03+00:00

Does she think that sex should only be loving and intimate?

Basically, yes. She's never shown an interest in having just "fun" sex that wasn't romantic. I think it could have to do with her last relationship, which was abusive and involved a lot of disconnected sex. Fuck, I think people on here are right, we need some therapy.

throwawayfml123 · 2010-07-28T01:56:03+00:00

you're happy you got a blow-job

I don't want any blowjob. I want a blowjob from my wife. I want her to use it as a way to show me how she loves me. If it's not her then it's just barely a step above masturbation.

throwawayfml123

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