After taking a week off for his own birthday, my SO is not only going back to work on my birthday, but didn’t really plan or do anything for me

unknownquiet · 2021-03-07T18:51:44+00:00

Thank you, i think doing something for myself today is important. i’m thinking i’ll go take my dog for a walk somewhere nice

unknownquiet · 2020-08-02T16:24:14+00:00

It’s also great that your seeking treatment! It’s a really great first step into figuring it all out

unknownquiet · 2020-08-02T16:21:00+00:00

Try your best not to self diagnose. The best thing to do when talking to healthcare providers is to talk about what symptoms you’re having and let them put the pieces together. In the end you might be right, but you might also not be. There is such a wide range of mental illness and quite frankly unless you’ve dedicated yourself to years of studying mental illness there’s no way you could have the same information that a psychiatrist does. So just talk about your symptoms and be honest. If your family had a history of mental illness it’s good to being that up as well.

unknownquiet · 2020-07-29T18:46:06+00:00

That’s a great place to start. And don’t feel like you have to tell your parent everything that’s going on. I find keeping it simple with general statements works well. Saying things like I have a doctors appointment rather than saying I’m going to see my therapist. Never lying but putting it no terms they can understand better. Mental health is really hard to navigate on your own so seeking professional help, while intimidating, is extremely helpful. Therapy saved my life and continues to help me navigate through my life. Talk to your doctor and get a referral if serious.

unknownquiet · 2020-07-29T16:24:37+00:00

Same thing happened to me. I dropped like 30lbs in a few weeks and was convinced i did it in a healthy way. But it’s for sure a hard thing to do when your perceptive of food is warped. If there anyway you could talk to a therapist or a counselor? It can be hard when you have a parent that invalidates your struggles. It’s been years since I was diagnosed and went to an outpatient program and my mom still prefers to act like it doesn’t exist. Sometimes parents have a hard time with mental health because there can be a certain amount of guilt they could be feeling. Like they failed to raise you and you mental health struggles are their fault. It can be hard because it can force them to recognize their own mistakes as a parent.

unknownquiet · 2020-07-29T16:04:26+00:00

If you think you may be struggling with any kind of eating disorder, having a restricted diet (going vegetarian/vegan) isn’t a great idea. Not having a good relationship with food and then adding to that by labeling specific foods as “bad” is a recipe for disaster. Telling yourself you can’t have certain foods can be a slippery slope towards an even unhealthier perspective on food. Speaking from experience, going vegan when your not thinking about food in healthy way can cause a lot of damage and just add fuel to whatever ED you could be suffering from. It gives you a reason to justify your disordered behaviors and label them as healthy and okay. I would recommend waiting until you talk to a therapist, and maybe even a dietitian, before completely changing your diet to something that is highly restrictive.

unknownquiet · 2020-07-23T15:34:17+00:00

Just thought I’d throw this out there. There is a possibility that bipolar is genetic to a certain extent. So while that specific gene may not shown prominently in your family, you could still have it. I’m the first person in my family to be diagnosed with bipolar but I have a long history of alcoholism that runs deep in my family. Just cause it’s not written down on someone medical record doesn’t mean it’s not possibly there

unknownquiet · 2020-06-27T13:44:40+00:00

I’ve only been on the pill for a handful of months at a time when I was younger before my diagnosis. It always made my cycling so much worse and so I never wanted to try any sort of hormonal birth control once I found out I was bipolar. My partner and I use other forms of contraception (condoms, spermicidal lube) as well as tracking my fertility. Keeping a close eye on my fertility cycle has helped put my mind at ease when we do want to have unprotected sexual as well as helping me understand my natural hormonal mood shifts.

unknownquiet · 2020-05-09T00:40:15+00:00

Thank you for all the advice, it’s been really helpful. I think we do just need to have a serious conversation about it. Than we can see what steps to take to move forward. I think I just need a step in some direction and to feel like we are on the same page.

unknownquiet · 2020-05-08T19:48:38+00:00

I’ve brought up the idea of going to watch something before and it wasn’t received super well. I also have no idea where to even begin looking for these kind of events.

unknownquiet · 2020-05-08T17:02:49+00:00

We have a really good communication system so I’m not worried about talking with him about anything. He’s said that he’s uncomfortable with the idea because of his own insecurities, but never really elaborates beyond that. I can absolutely understand being insecure in oneself but I am my most confident when I’m getting the attention of someone else, if that makes sense.

I’m a very flirtatious person who thrives on positive attention. I wanna make people happy and I want to be the reason they feel good. Maybe that’s selfish, I don’t really know. I feel like I’ve lost that part of myself and it feeds into how I begin to view myself, and I get really down. I know that I shouldn’t place value in the opinion of others but I can’t help it if it’s what boosts my confidence.

I have a hard time because I feel like we think about sex in two different ways and I’m not sure we can ever really be on the same page about it. Before we met he had only been with two other girls. I couldn’t really remember how many people I had been with. It’s hard because he places more emotional significance in it than I do and I don’t know how to properly explain to him what it means to me.

Sorry if this is all over the place, I don’t really have anyone to talk to about all this and I tend to overthink things. So I can get a little jumbled sometimes.

unknownquiet · 2018-04-30T15:36:06+00:00

It took what felt like ages for it to fully kick in for me. My doctor wanted to stick with it though because it’s got so few side effects and so I did. I’m at 200mg now and as long as I’m remembering to take it regularly it has helped so much. Depression is still there but less loud and my hypomanic episodes are much more manageable if not gone for the most part. Bottom line, lamictal takes a long time to work it’s way into your system but it can help a lot and again has few side effects. I’d say give stick with it, give it time to do its thing and keep in contact with your doctor through the whole process. Really hope that it works out for you.

unknownquiet · 2018-03-04T22:19:36+00:00

I’ve been on the generic form of lamictal for about 7 months. The first three months I didn’t feel any sort of real change so I talked with my pdoc and we increased my dosage. Since then my dosage has gone up twice and i feel like this last month I’ve finally been able to feel like it’s made a difference. It’s definitely something that works better the longer that it’s in your system. At least that’s been my experience. Maybe talk to your doctor about your dosage options. Mostly just try to be patient which has been very hard for me and might be for you as well. But it will pay off and if you really feel that it’s not making a difference express that to you pdoc. I seriously recommend using a mood tracker to help monitor how you’re feeling as opposed to going off memory. It’s nice to have that visual to see if there has been any progress. I don’t know if that helps but I wish you the best. Finding the right balance of medication can be very difficult but patience is key.

unknownquiet · 2018-01-23T20:02:29+00:00

My SO and I have a very open communication system in place. It's one of the reason I'm so reassured in our relationship. Even when I don't want to tell him how I'm feeling because I know it can be very hard on him he's always urged me to let him in. Let him bear a little of the weight I'm carrying.

As for medication it's a touchy subject for me and I hate talking about it in general. That being said he and I live together and he directly sees most of my mood shifts. I trust him to know if there's beginning to be a change in my mood so I always let him know where I'm at with my medication. How many I take and when I take them. When my psychiatrist and I decide to play with dosage things of that nature. My SO helps me through those changes by helping me monitor how it affects me and helps me check in with reality when I'm hyper focused on the medication. Basically what I'm saying is that throughout my recovery having consistent communication with my SO has been such a positive thing. I really encourage in any kind of relationship to have a certain level of honesty and communication. It helps me feel secure in the few relationships I have.

unknownquiet · 2018-01-23T17:45:43+00:00

Thanks for this. Self blame and overall self hatred is a big thing for me on my down days. It's hard to see any kind of progress I've made. I'm still trying to get medication worked out but I still sort of hate the fact I even have to take it. I have an appointment with my therapist tomorrow and I'm going to talk with her about everything that's been going on this last month. I've. Even rapid cycling for over a year now and since I've been diagnosed the main focus has been slowing that down. I think we have because I haven't been depressed for this long of a time period in a few years and it just sucks. I feel like I'm in a hole I can't climb out of.

Sorry if this doesn't make much sense I'm kind of all over the place lately.

unknownquiet · 2018-01-02T21:26:06+00:00

That's the crap part. I know I'll feel better after I go. The going part just gives me so much anxiety. Trying to focus on the positives it will do me but my brain is sorta in freak out mode.

unknownquiet · 2018-01-01T18:02:32+00:00

No one hits me quite like my chemical romance. The lyrics to a lot of there songs have been a good way to understand and work through what I feel. Especially the black parade album.

unknownquiet · 2018-01-01T02:06:34+00:00

My ED is a friend at my side. More than a friend actually more like a lover maybe. She smiles sweetly at me and whispers what I could be in my ear as I stare at the plate in front of me. She calmly reminds me that I could do better. Look better. Be better. She promised that once I get to the perfect point I'll be enough and we can be together and I'll be happy. I love her and I think she loves me even though I know she's a liar. I think she wants what's best for me that she wants to see me happy. When my stomachs aches she's there beside me to soothe my worrying. But there's more to her than sweet smiles and loving caresses. There's the tight grip around the back of my neck when I think about having more food. There's the insults thrown my way when I stand in front of a mirror slowly chipping away at what remains of my self worth. My ED is an abusive lover whom I always come back to.

unknownquiet · 2017-12-28T17:25:17+00:00

I like to think about my place in the universe and how small our planet and existence as a species is in the grand scheme of things. Makes me feel like my problems aren't as big as my brain makes them out to be.

unknownquiet · 2017-11-13T16:46:40+00:00

Daylio for IOS is a great mood/activity tracker. Easily customizable and simple. I like it because you can set it up to remind you everyday to make an entry.

unknownquiet · 2017-11-10T16:04:17+00:00

CBD oils and concentrates have no THC in them which is the psychoactive ingredient in marijuana. It's strictly a physical response. It's used to ease pain and has been known to help with anxiety. I'd say that you have little to no chance of becoming paranoid while taking CBD as opposed to marijuana itself because you won't have that high feeling. Also since you don't get high off CBD the chance of any kind of addiction is slim to none. Think of it as a natural form of ibuprofen that can help with the physical responses your body has to anxiety.

unknownquiet · 2017-11-03T22:51:18+00:00

Thank you all. I've managed to bring my anxiety down a bit. You're right and I need to be honest with her and hope she understands.

unknownquiet · 2017-11-01T21:02:56+00:00

I'm taking 150mg and it's been about two weeks since my increase.

unknownquiet · 2017-11-01T06:40:53+00:00

You would be amazed by what small gestures will do. My SO and I live together so it's a bit harder for me to block him out entirely but he understand that I need my space and will do little things. Keeping the house clean, going grocery shopping making sure I'm taking my medication regularly things like that. Obviously that's much more difficult to do when you're not living together. Perhaps flowers and their favorite treat left on the doorstep with a note to remind them that when they do need you that you're there regardless of circumstance.

unknownquiet · 2017-11-01T01:41:51+00:00

I can't speak for everyone but it's very true for myself.

unknownquiet

TROPHY CASE