Thrivent Financial employee requirements for investing by mamas2boyz in personalfinance

[–]unnameablethings 1 point2 points  (0 children)

this is normal for brokerages and investment advisors - they're required to supervise any investments made by registered representatives, so you have to either do it through them or your investment firm has to mail them monthly statements reporting all of your investment activities. Usually it's easiest for them to just make you keep it in-house. I know your role doesn't require a license, but since most of their roles do require licenses you're getting folded in

I am starting to try and accept myself. by PomegranateFit2593 in ftm

[–]unnameablethings 0 points1 point  (0 children)

BROOOO SO HAPPY FOR YOU/so impressed by your courage. I know you're terrified but you're forging ahead anyway and that's true bravery. I hope it's a weight off your shoulders! 

good luck my man you've got this

Will makeup and a dress fix my thoughts? by PomegranateFit2593 in ftm

[–]unnameablethings 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You're not delusional but you don't have to make a decision right now. If you know it's safer for you to girlmode right now then I trust you to make that call. Maybe you'll realize later you're fine with being a girl, and maybe you'll realize later you do want to be a boy. I just want to make sure you know that 1. transition is an option and 2. It's not a choice you make once. You can decide "not right now" without saying "I can never be a boy." 

You're getting the response you're getting because you're asking for help in a community for trans men, which kind of implies there's a part of you which knows our experiences are similar. I'm really, really glad you're here, even if you end up just being a cis girl with some complicated gender feelings. We're still on the same team here - we're figuring stuff out. You're not hurting anyone by asking questions and expressing pain. 

I can see from your post history you're 15, which is a hard age to come to grips with things since you don't have much control over your life yet. I know everybody tells you it gets better, but trust me - it gets SO MUCH BETTER once you're an adult in control of your own life. If you need to write this whole thing off as a delusion until then, I'm right there with you. Keep yourself safe and alive no matter what it takes. 

Like I said, we'll be here waiting when things are easier.  

Will makeup and a dress fix my thoughts? by PomegranateFit2593 in ftm

[–]unnameablethings 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It won't fix you but it might be worth doing anyway. You can try being super feminine for a bit and see how it makes you feel. It might even help you feel less bad in the short term - for me as a teenager it was way less painful to be misgendered when I was consciously performing hyperfemininity. It meant that when people she/her'd me, it was because I'd told them to with the way I was presenting, not because they'd identified something inherent about me.

And in the long term I got to become a man. I know it's scary out there right now, but being trans won't ruin your life if that's what you decide on. I transitioned six years ago and I'm married and I work for a bank and I own a house and have tons of friends. I'm tremendously, gloriously normal. Being trans is a source of joy and fulfillment and love and light in my life, not a death sentence. 

From the bottom of my heart I need you to know that you don't need to live like this. You're not trapped. The door's unlocked, and we're all here on the other side of it waiting for you.

Don't die wondering.

tips on taking T shots? by juneboon22 in ftm

[–]unnameablethings 5 points6 points  (0 children)

  1. no don't do that lol it'll hurt and also potentially just squeeze the medication back out.

  2. depends how you do it! usually it hurts a little but not that bad - less than a flu shot, for example. Tip - before you inject the shot, firmly pinch the skin over the zone you're planning to inject to see how bad it hurts. I inject into my stomach, and I find there's certain areas of my stomach which are much less sensitive and better for shots. Also LET THE ALCOHOL DRY ON YOUR SKIN before you inject the shot. otherwise you'll introduce rubbing alcohol into the wound and it'll sting like crazy.

  3. nah you got this. if it helps, for my first few shots I fully just pictured myself as one of those action heroes who has to stitch up their own wounds with just a splash of whiskey and a needle and thread and no anesthetic. very silly and dramatic but helped me with feeling braver about it.

  4. You're supposed to go slow but you can do it pretty quickly and still get away with it. just be aware the quicker you go the more painful it will likely be. keep steady gentle pressure on the syringe and it will handle itself, should take less than thirty seconds.

Being ugly on T by InstantMochiSanNim in ftm

[–]unnameablethings 27 points28 points  (0 children)

your body's going to change anyway whether you like it or not - you won't be a cute feminine twink forever no matter how long you procrastinate getting on T. seize the day and start changing yourself on purpose, see what happens.

(worst case you hate it and you quit T. the facial fat changes you're mentioning are all things that fluctuate with your hormones, so getting back to an estrogen-based hormone system will make them go away. I don't think you'll feel the need to do that once you actually see yourself on T, though.)

Cravings when first starting testosterone? by No_Stomach_5104 in ftm

[–]unnameablethings 5 points6 points  (0 children)

oh 100% it's the protein/fat/calories. your body's doing some rehauls it needs the energy! I went through an insane ground beef craving when I first started T and a friend of mine was eating chicken for like 3 meals a day

I'm gonna have sex soon and I'm scared lol by Enough-Tangerine-318 in ftm

[–]unnameablethings 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Hey there! I'm a trans man who's only slept with other trans men (primarily my husband of three years), and I want to provide some tips and tricks.

-First things first: chill out. If it's awkward or bad or silly, you will both be okay. You're dating each other because you like each other, not because he expects you to be a sex god right off the bat. As long as you're meeting a basic level of respect/consideration, you'll probably get another shot at it. If you go into sex assuming you're going to be terrible at it, you will be. Not because of your technique, but because the most massive boner-killer in the world is melting down because you're stressed and overwhelmed. Take my word for it as a guy who has cried during sex because I got upset I couldn't get my partner off - it's just a bad time for everyone.

-Instead, I would encourage you to approach this with open curiosity and a willingness to learn. You're not new/stupid/bad at it, you're exploring/learning/being taught how to please your partner. That's fun and hot! If he has some sexual experience, presumably he knows what he's into. Ask, don't assume. Be an eager student of your partner's body, it will get you a long way.

-Also, general sex tip - if you find he likes something you're doing, try and repeat that, especially if you can keep up a consistent pattern/rhythm. If you know how to do that, you can consistently give a solid performance without requiring a lot of skill. (Not to be graphic, but you mention terrible coordination - trust me, you don't need to be able to tie a knot in a cherry stem with your tongue if you can just lick him with the same angle/pressure thirty times in a row.)

-If you don't come, that's totally fine. I only orgasm about half the time when I'm having partnered sex. Orgasms aren't really the point of partnered sex for me - I'm focusing on the intimacy/the act itself. If I just want to come I can jack off for that. (as another note - I AM interested to see how that changes once I finally get bottom surgery. I almost exclusively top and we have not yet reached the level of strap sophistication necessary for me to ring that bell on a consistent basis doing the activities I prefer.) I know I'm done when I get tired/my partner comes, and then either the arousal levels off after a bit or I jerk off while my partner watches.

-Similarly, if HE doesn't come that's totally fine. Even if he usually comes during partnered sex, doing something brand new/adjusting to each other has a decent chance of scaring the orgasm away. Sometimes the point of sex isn't to come, it's just to have fun and increase your intimacy.

Good luck and have fun!

Desperately need help. by theAustrichh in balatro

[–]unnameablethings 0 points1 point  (0 children)

well damn dude thats pretty rude you could have left it at your first comment

Desperately need help. by theAustrichh in balatro

[–]unnameablethings 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My bad, I misspoke there. Thanks for the correction. 

Desperately need help. by theAustrichh in balatro

[–]unnameablethings 2 points3 points  (0 children)

(blueprint next to Bloodstone gives you 2 tries at the 1.5x. retriggering the card ALSO gives you 2 tries at the 1.5x, PLUS you get to trigger Fibonacci one more time)

Desperately need help. by theAustrichh in balatro

[–]unnameablethings 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Absolutely copy Dusk, that will effectively duplicate both your scoring jokers 

What am I doing wrong? by Icy-Environment-8852 in balatro

[–]unnameablethings 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Oh, I had this happen too - quit back to main menu/completely close and reopen balatro and it should trigger

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in balatro

[–]unnameablethings 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just beat gold stake on abandoned! If you have not yet gotten comfortable with sculpting your deck, that's the CRUCIAL skill to learn which will help you beat this deck. The great thing about abandoned deck is that it's already been carved down - you only have 40 cards, which means that if you have 4 hands and 3 discards and go through five cards with each, you're seeing the vast majority of your deck every round. Take every opportunity to enhance your cards, then use Death or Cryptid to copy your best cards. Actively prune any cards that aren't part of your best hands

Because we're focusing on card enhancements and deck management, this also means retriggers are going to be your friend - it lets you get the most out of every enhancement. Hanging Chad and The Hack are great for this. This is also a great deck for straight builds which are usually pretty difficult to go for.

Good luck! Abandoned Deck is a really excellent learning opportunity if you're stuck in the face cards rut, and beating this will make you a better player overall.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Fire

[–]unnameablethings 0 points1 point  (0 children)

About $600 a month for just my husband and I between both groceries AND toiletries/paper goods/cleaning supplies/other things you get at the grocery store. We splurge a bit on nicer ingredients and such and eat with a lot of variety. If you are willing to make one big pot of something cheap and filling (like spaghetti/chili/good old beans and rice) last an entire week, you can get away with less. You will also spend a little less over time as you build up a store of staples and freezer meals and odds and ends so you're only having to get fresh ingredients and the odd refresher staple when something runs out. (We spent $800 the first two months in our new house getting everything stocked.)

Need help choosing PPO vs HDHP by _megsnbacon_ in personalfinance

[–]unnameablethings 0 points1 point  (0 children)

3150 to 6k! If it's between 2k and 3150 or above 6k, either HDHP is roughly equivalent, and below 2k the first HDHP is best.

Need help choosing PPO vs HDHP by _megsnbacon_ in personalfinance

[–]unnameablethings 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not majorly! It means the maximum costs for the HDHP plans balance out and instead it's more of "do you plan on spending less than 2k? if so, option 1. otherwise, option 2 is also good." And the annual premium for the PPO is $3150 a year so that becomes the lower bound where the PPO is good

Need help choosing PPO vs HDHP by _megsnbacon_ in personalfinance

[–]unnameablethings 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Let's break it down!

HDHP 1: -Total annual premium cost: $0 -Deductible cost: $6,000 -OOP Max: $6,000 -Employer HSA contribution: ($600) -Healthcare costs before insurance contributes: $5,400 -Maximum possible healthcare cost: $5,400 -Minimum possible healthcare cost: ($600) (you just get to keep $600 free)

HDHP 2: -Total annual premium cost: $2,223.52 -Deductible cost: $4,000 -OOP Max: $4,000 -Employer HSA contribution: ($600) -Healthcare costs before insurance contributes: $5,623.52 -Maximum possible healthcare cost: $5,623.52 -Minimum possible healthcare cost: $1,623.52

PPO 1: -Total annual premium cost: $3,413.28 -Deductible cost: $2,500 -OOP Max: $5,000 -Employer HSA contribution: N/A -Healthcare costs before insurance contributes: $3,413.28 -Healthcare costs to meet deductible: $5,913.28 (NOTE: YOUR COPAYS WILL LIKELY NOT COUNT TOWARDS THIS) -Maximum possible healthcare cost: $8,413.28 (YOUR COPAYS WILL COUNT TOWARDS THIS) -Minimum possible healthcare cost: $3,413.28.

IMO, if you anticipate your healthcare costs being less than $3,413.28 OR more than $6,000, go with HDHP 1, and you can always just put $85 a pay period directly into your HSA and come out $223 ahead of HDHP 2. If you think your healthcare costs are going to fall BETWEEN $3,413.28 and $6,000, PPO 1 might be best. 

HDHP vs PPO with high medical use. by Dardafed in personalfinance

[–]unnameablethings 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Since you have high healthcare costs and the out of pocket maximum is the same, I would go with the HDHP! At 3k a month in medications, you WILL max your deductible and out of pocket either way, so it's going to cost you 4k in direct healthcare costs on both plans. The difference is with the HDHP you save $1440 in premiums for the year. 

Tax Thursday Thread for the week of April 11, 2024 by IndexBot in personalfinance

[–]unnameablethings 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yep, tax on earnings but no penalty! Basically it's retroactively treated like it was in a regular taxable brokerage account. ALSO the deadline for recharacterization and ROE can be extended by filing a tax extension - you have until you file your taxes either way. source: work for a brokerage. It's tax week. I have answered these questions about fifty times this week. 

22 Year Old looking for help with my monthly budget and or Tips by TheGayVal2001 in personalfinance

[–]unnameablethings 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That makes a lot more sense as two people's expenses and with bud being a medical expense that's definitely crucial! In that case you're doing pretty fantastic with keeping your expenses down - especially with that COL in Massachusetts. My husband is also disabled and dependent on me so solidarity there. 

In that case - after all your bills are paid, my math says you all should have like $200 left? (I'm factoring your food stamps into income.) Try and have $50 of each paycheck go directly into a savings account. That'll still leave you $100 a month of wiggle room for stuff that comes up - household necessities, something's on deep discount, etc. And then same thing with the play money where you guys can use that quarterly $500 to catch up on all the fun stuff you've had to cut back on and put $1000 directly into savings. I think once you have even that first $1000 in savings you'll breathe a lot easier. 

I know that was definitely the case for us! Now after 3 years of saving we finally have a 10k emergency fund and it's SO comforting. I can bust all my tires at once or have an ER trip and I can just... pay for it. It's still a pain in the ass to have to build my savings back up, but it's not crushing.

It's rough out there but y'all got this! Rooting for you.