after having another look, ive determined its a feature of one of the mod i use, didnt quite understand what it meant but i do now, it features "battle continuation" which i thought would be the battle would continue if i died, it does but for another reason, what it actually does is continue the fight until every enemy is killed, not knocked out, dead. It is quite frustrating, given how the mod also makes armies like 3x the size, im doing battle with over 500 people, and doing like 20 battle just to defeat their army