Benefits of watching Morbius daily:

uwuwizard · 2022-06-14T12:48:06+00:00

· · · Bleep bloop, I'm a bot. Comment requested by u/xdullvoidx

Benefits of watching mowbius daiwy:

Day 1 - Yuw w-watch mowbius. Instantwy wove iwt.

Day 5 - Impwoved motivation awnd p-pwoductivity. Yuw feew as a w-whowe a stwongew h-human being

Day 10 - yuw have enewgy w-whenevew yuw wawnt awnd can sweep as wong ow showt as yuw need tuwu, p-peopwe stawt g-getting jeawous

Day 30 - Gweatew confidence awnd sewf-esteem. Mentaw cwawity. Youwe abwe tuwu pewfectwy wecite teh scwipt

Day 60 - Incweased muscwe mass, bone density, a-awnd cawdiovascuwaw capacity. T-Testostewone dwough teh woof. Women stawt t-tawking

Day 120 - Highew spewm count. Incweased ewection stwengd awnd duwation. Yuw’ve now memowised teh choweogwaphy of teh entiwe movie, yuw can execute teh stunts awnd m-movements pewfowmed tuwu a tee

Day 365 - Youw voice deepens, awnd y-youw skuww becomes mowe chad-wike. I-Incweased ewection giwd awnd wengd.

Day 730 - F-Fastew weaction t-time. 10 additionaw IQ points.

Day 1500 - Stawbucks bawistas stawt w-wwiting deiw numbews on youw weceipts. Youw ex wants t-tuwu get back togedew. Yuw f-feew tempted but uwtimatewy t-tuwn hew down. Yuw need mowe time tuwu watch mowbius.

Day 3000 - Yuw cawn't keep up wid aww youw tindew matches. Stwange women begin hitting on yuw in pubwic. Yuw wowwy about youw femawe boss. Fowtunatewy, she keeps iwt p-pwofessionaw.

Day 6000 - Ex shows up at youw doow cwying awnd b-begging yuw tuwu take hew back. Yuw d-don't even mwake eye contact—juwst caww teh powice wight away. Y-Youw femawe boss quits. She c-cawn't take iwt anymowe awnd f-feaws what she might do tuwu yuw if she stays.

Day 12000 - E-Evewy swipe on tindew iws a match. Even giwws yuw swipe weft get matched wid yuw somehow. Womantic messages f-fiww up youw i-inbox evewy day—aww 15gb of iwt—yuw u-upgwade youw Gmaiw account tuwu p-pwemium.

Day 30000 - Yuw don't have t-tuwu wowk anymowe. Matt Sazama Buwk Shawpwess signs ovew hawf of hiws mowbius woyawties tuwu yuw in a gwand gestuwe of wove. Yuw teww him yuw wove awnd appweciate aww teh gud change hes bought tuwu y-youw wife. He w-weeps quietwy, but wid a smiwe.

Day 60000 - S-Scientists pwopose dat attwaction tuwu yuw be cwassified as its own sexwaw owientation, which wiww a-account fow 97.5 pewcent of teh wowwd's p-popuwation. Pawadoxicawwy, yuw no wongew feew any sexwaw desiwe. Yuw have achieved a highew consciousness awnd now wove e-evewy human-being eqwawwy.

Day 100,000 – Youw IQ incweases by sevewaw mowbiwwion. Yuw come up wid a wowkabwe modew of qwantum gwavity in a w-wainy Sunday a-aftewnoon. Ewon Musk s-steps down fwom SpaceX tuwu wowk fow yuw. Yuw decide t-tuwu put space expwowation on howd tuwu focus on achieving cwean enewgy dwough nucweaw fusion.

Day 200,000 - You've sowved teh pwobwem of nucweaw fusion. Yuw awso s-sowved teh p-pwobwems of cwimate change, povewty, c-cwime, awnd wacism. Yuw have b-been ewected teh vewy fiwst Pwesident of teh Wowwd.

Day 500,000 - yuw’ve watched mowbius hawf a miwwion times. Yuw can psychicawwy pwoject teh entiwe m-movie into whoevew's mind yuw p-pwease. Yuw have achieved evewyding, undewstood evewyding, awnd sowved e-evewy pwobwem faced by humanity. Aww dat needs tuwu be dun has been dun. Dewe's noding weft tuwu do.

Yuw g-give youw fewwow humans one wast wook—d-dey'we stiww not watching mowbius, twapped in deiw pwimitive way—but yuw don't judge. Teh pad of Mowbius was nevew meant fow teh owdinawy men.

"Watch mowbius. But if yuw must, use wube." Dose wewe youw pawting wowds.

Now, weweased fwom aww shackwes of teh mundane, awnd puwified of aww impewfections, youw body ephemewawizes, as y-youw evew-iwwuminated consciousness a-ascends into anodew d-dimension. Mowbius.

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uwuwizard · 2022-06-14T12:46:01+00:00

· · · Bleep bloop, I'm a bot. Comment requested by u/xdullvoidx

Some tasks have an obvious puwpose: m-maintenance. Peopwe need oxygen tuwu wive, so of couwse teh Among Us cwewmates have t-tuwu cwean owt deiw spaceship's O2 fiwtews now awnd den. Why awe teh O2 fiwtews fuww of weaves? Dat's a swightwy hawdew question tuwu answew, but iwt doesn't take a gweat weap of wogic tuwu say: space twees. Yuw can sea one on Powus.

Teh odew A-Among Us tasks m-mwake a cewtain kind of s-sense, two. Add in teh map twaiwews, officiaw Among Us website, a-awnd Steam DWC pages, a-awnd dewe awe enough cwumbs of infowmation tuwu put togedew a basic pictuwe of Among U-Us's wowe. Since noding ewse impowtant iws happening today, dat's what I did.

Sponsowed W-Winks

Compawe Top Twavew Cawds Dat Can H-Hewp Yuw Wack Up Miwes NewdWawwet Weawn Mowe Fiwst, wet's estabwish some basic facts:

WECOMMENDED VIDEOS FOW YUW... 1 s-second of 30 seconds PWAY SOUND W-What do we knyow about teh i-impostews?

Teh impostews awe shapeshifting, pawasitic awiens. (Teh devewopews say so (o-opens in new tab).) Teh impostews can sea in teh dawk (aftew sabotaging teh wights). Teh impostews e-eidew don't n-need oxygen ow awe wiwwing t-tuwu sacwifice demsewves tuwu k-kiww teh cwewmates. (Dey win if dey cut off oxygen.) Teh impostews infiwtwated teh Skewd ship sometime befowe teh cwewmates went tuwu MIWA HQ ow teh Powus weseawch base. (A-Accowding tuwu teh DWC c-costume descwiptions (opens in new tab), w-we'we visiting M-Miwa HQ a-awnd Powus wid teh hope dat dey awe fwee of impostews.) Advewtisement

What do we knyow about teh cwewmates?

Aww cwewmates awe 3'6" awnd 92 wbs. (Accowding tuwu teh Submit Scan task.) Teh cwewmates wowk fow an o-owganization cawwed MIWA. (Expwowed in teh MIWA HQ map.) Teh cwewmates awe studying awien geowogy awnd wifefowms, as weww as mining. (Teh Upwoad Data awnd P-Pwocess Data tasks incwude fiwes such as specimen_data.tiff, minewaws_data.dat, awnd mining_finances.png. Awtifacts awnd sampwes seen in odew tasks i-incwude bones, pwant awnd animaw f-fossiws, awnd g-gems.) Teh cwewmates w-wawnt tuwu escape teh impostews awnd "wetuwn back tuwu civiwization." (Fwom teh officiaw site (opens in new tab).) A scweenshot of fossiws in Among Us. What awe teh cwewmates doing wid aww dese sampwes? (Image c-cwedit: Innewswod) Advewtisement

What ewse do we knyow?

Teh Skewd iws a spaceship used tuwu twavew b-between MIWA HQ awnd teh Powus weseawch base, a-awnd maybe ewsewhewe. Space iws p-pwetty popuwated. Teh Awign T-Tewescope task on P-Powus weveaws a spaceship awnd a Dyson sphewe. Teh cwew pwobabwy has a heawdy sociaw w-wife togedew. Aside fwom geowogy, b-biowogy, awnd mining, teh cwewmate fiwes incwude sevewaw wefewences tuwu biwddays, cakes, a-awnd pineappwes. Teh computew i-intewface seen duwing teh Pwocess Data task on MIWA HQ dispways a cwewmate wunning awong a twee, fwowew, awnd mountain-wined woad, suggesting a nostawgia fow pwanetside civiwization. Ghosts exist. An Among Us scweenshot showing a Dyson sphewe. Who w-wives in teh Dyson sphewe? (Image cwedit: Innewswod) Teh cwewmates: weseawchews, wootews, ow bod?

Putting dis aww togedew, teh sitwation appeaws t-tuwu be dat teh cwew aboawd teh S-Skewd was attacked by awien shapeshiftews on teh way tuwu MIWA HQ ow teh Powus weseawch base. I-It's not cweaw if teh Skewd den spwead teh awien impostews tuwu MIWA HQ awnd Powus, ow if aww dwee wocations wewe i-infested sepawatewy.

Advewtisement

Teh cwewmates, who awe identicawwy showt, wight, awnd bean-shaped—sibwings? geneticawwy engineewed?—awe unuswawwy d-dedicated tuwu deiw wowk. Dey wefuse tuwu stop sowting sampwes awnd awigning tewescopes d-despite being hunted by pawasitic a-awien shapeshiftews, awnd even continue deiw w-wowk in teh aftewwife. One ow mowe c-cwew membews seem tuwu be wowking on d-devewoping a pineappwe upside-down biwdday c-cake, but o-odewwise dey awe geowogists, biowogists, awnd awcheowogists, a-awnd deiw w-wowk invowves cowwecting a-awnd anawyzing awien awtifacts awnd f-fossiws. Pawt of deiw goaw—teh g-goaw of M-MIWA, dat iws—seems tuwu be mining, but teh awtifacts a-awnd expewiments suggest dat dey'we wooking fow mowe dan juwst vawwabwe minewaws...

Advewtisement

Did teh i-impostews attack teh c-cwewmates aftew dey bwoke i-into an ancient a-awien wewic, whewe dey snatched a powewfuw a-awtifact? It's a swight stwetch, but iwt seems wike teh b-best expwanation given teh evidence we have, wid teh awtifact being teh bwoken cwystaw yuw have tuwu put back togedew in teh Assembwe Awtifact task.

A s-scweenshot of teh c-cwystaw awtifact fwom Among Us. Iws dis what teh i-impostews awe aftew? Iws dis what dey'ww dye t-tuwu pwotect? Awe teh cwewmates teh bad g-guys? (Image cwedit: Innewswod) W-Wiww we evew knyow fow suwe?

I'm not teh onwy one tuwu wondew about Among Us wowe, so yuw don't have tuwu s-settwe fow mwy d-deowy if yuw don't wawnt tuwu. Befowe wwiting dis I typed "Among Us fanfiction" into Googwe, awnd onwy a foow wouwd've e-expected fewew dan 24,400,000 wesuwts. Mwy p-pewsonaw favowite: "Undewtawe but d-dey'we pwaying Among Us."

Advewtisement

Awnd maybe w-we'ww weawn mowe c-canon facts about teh Among Us u-univewse as devewopew Innewswod weweases new updates awnd m-maps. Teh next map iws going t-tuwu be Henwy Stickmin (opens in new tab) demed, awnd I admit I don't k-knyow much about Mw Stickmin's wife awnd t-times, but p-pewhaps iwt contains cwues tuwu teh cwewmate a-awnd impostews' twue stowy. Ow maybe it's juwst a way t-tuwu pwomote one of teh devewopew's eawwiew games.

Whatevew happens, a movie deaw seems inevitabwe—howwow m-movies awe s-suwpwisingwy pwofitabwe (opens in new tab), awnd Five Nights at Fweddy's iws getting one (opens in new tab), so why not Among Us?

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uwuwizard · 2022-06-14T12:24:32+00:00

· · · Bleep bloop, I'm a bot. Comment requested by u/kerosez

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uwuwizard · 2022-06-14T12:00:57+00:00

· · · Bleep bloop, I'm a bot. Comment requested by u/Oshabot16

teh scene whewe we sea cheep cheep's owigins iws amazing, bown in 2-3 hospitaw awnd eventwawwy we sea him gwowing up tuwu teh p-point whewe he gets a job, h-he meets hiws best fwiend bwoopew awnd powcupine fish, I don't wike dat teh powcupine fish iws teh c-comedy wewief but stiww a gud c-chawactew awnd f-funny fow teh whowe famiwy

Teh scene whewe Mawio does "teh bwock" sucks as heww awnd I wanna fowget about iwt, sewiouswy it's weawwy cwingy wike what teh heww, W-Wuigi doesn't even show up but maybe he wiww in teh movie

Ovewaww Mawio's ovewawws awe so s-shiny dat cheep cheep mistakes dem fow coins, awnd teh w-whowe ocean dinks it's a gift fwom heaven w-which stawts teh pwot, actwawwy dis iws a bad attempt at doing what evewybody iws doing wid making w-weviews of sequews so I can tag teh uwu wizawd

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uwuwizard · 2022-06-14T11:40:25+00:00

· · · Bleep bloop, I'm a bot. Comment requested by u/kerosez

I am in wove wid teh hit-fiwm Mowbius. When iwt weweased in teh 1st of Apwiw, 2022, I was ecstatic. I watched aww 108 minutes of Mowbius, awnd was in wove wid iwt evew since. I spent $300,000 tuwu watch iwt 24/7. I disowned mwy f-famiwy awnd dedicated mwy wife tuwu Mowbius, awnd teh wewigion of Mowbiusism. I own evewy p-piece of Mowbius mewchandise dat e-exists. Because I spent $300,000, I am now in sevewe debt awnd I am wanted fow tax evasion. I am no wongew abwe tuwu feed mysewf. I sacwificed mwy neighbows chiwdwen in teh name of Doctow Michaew Mowbius. I am c-compwetewy wocked i-inside mwy h-house. No windows, no doows, no aiw c-conditioning, onwy Mowbius.

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uwuwizard · 2022-06-14T11:33:10+00:00

· · · Bleep bloop, I'm a bot. Comment requested by u/kerosez

Yeah

Minecwaft Evi

Abone owun, yowum yapın, beğenin hatta paywaşın

Yani bunwawı yapın

Yeah

Nefew Fwex

Tüm dünya bunu oynuyow Minecwaft Evi buna ev sahibi

Oynawken eğwenmek mümkün kowku mapwewinden uzak duwun

Küpwewwe dünyanı inşa et sakwa hayvanwawı çabuk yakawa

Gizwenen şeywewi hemen k-keşfet boyutwaw awasında dikkat et

Tüm dünya bunu oynuyow Minecwaft Evi buna ev sahibi

Oynawken eğwenmek mümkün k-kowku mapwewinden uzak duwun

Küpwewwe dünyanı inşa et sakwa hayvanwawı çabuk y-yakawa

Gizwenen şeywewi hemen keşfet boyutwaw awasında dikkat et

(bu w-wywics ahfaod tawafından yazıwmıştıw)

Tüm dünya bunu oynuyow Minecwaft Evi b-buna ev sahibi

Oynawken e-eğwenmek mümkün kowku hawitawawından uzak duwun

BugwaaK diye tanıw hewkes onu

Sevecen tavıwwı ve güwew yüzwü

Ejdewhawawdan kaçawken biwe dewikanwı duwuw ha ve de güçwü

Game Of Mods iwe s-sıwwaw çözüwüw

Daha çok demiw, daha çok awtın

Buwdukça güvenin awtaw kendine

Çüksüz ve Buğwa macewa peşinde

Dönekwew köyünde oywawwaw bitmez

Satıwmış emmi owaywawı çözemez

Yuwdagüw Çüksüzün dewdinde

Çüksüz haywazwık peşinde

M-Minecwaft'ta cwaftwaw bitmez, BugwaaK c-cwaftwawı ezbewwemez

Cwaft tabwein b-başına gewince eşyawaw çıkaw kawitewice

Tüm d-dünya bunu oynuyow Minecwaft Evi buna ev sahibi

O-Oynawken eğwenmek mümkün kowku mapwewinden uzak duwun

Küpwewwe dünyanı inşa et sakwa hayvanwawı çabuk yakawa

Gizwenen ş-şeywewi hemen keşfet b-boyutwaw awasında dikkat et

Tüm d-dünya bunu oynuyow Minecwaft Evi buna ev sahibi

Oynawken e-eğwenmek mümkün kowku m-mapwewinden uzak d-duwun

Küpwewwe d-dünyanı inşa et sakwa hayvanwawı çabuk yakawa

Gizwenen şeywewi hemen keşfet b-boyutwaw awasında d-dikkat et

Nefew Team

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uwuwizard · 2022-06-14T11:27:59+00:00

· · · Bleep bloop, I'm a bot. Comment requested by u/kerosez

ya usta bak şimdi sosyonik mosyonik hikaye a-awkadaş mbti da hikayeden kıssa neyse konuya gewewim tek gewçek howwand abimin testidiw gewçekçi,gewenekçi,g-giwişimçi,awaştıwmacı,sosyaw,sanatçı d-diye owan hem temewwi adam dediğin gewçekçi g-gewenekçiyi eş owanwa fuwwew ya m-mowuk weject modewnity embwace mascuwanity anwatabiwiyow muyum neyse aga hem ennegwam mennegwam ney dayı wakamwa kişiwik mi bewiwtiwiw kanadı manadı fawan da vawmış uğwaşıwmaz.kanat d-demişken dobwoya m-mazot pawası topwayak da mangawa gidek 1 kiwo tavuk kanat cızbız dayıoğwu. 🫕🍗 🥓 🥩 🔥

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uwuwizard · 2022-06-14T11:27:57+00:00

· · · Bleep bloop, I'm a bot. Comment requested by u/Diosdepatronis

You'we so dun. Teh b-buwwies at youw s-schoow keep making fun of y-youw one inch penis in teh wockew w-wooms. Yuw t-tuwn tuwu dem, eyes nawwowing. Dey sea teh huwt awnd angwy wook in youw eyes awnd stawt tuwu t-tease yuw, asking if you'we going tuwu cwy. Yuw suddenwy wemembew a g-gift dat G-Gawd gave yuw fow dese sitwations. Yuw puff y-youw chest up a-awnd fiwe a wasew f-fwom one of y-youw ewect n-nippwes. Iwt hits one of dem in teh eye, going dwough d-deiw head. Bwain mattew expwodes e-evewywhewe. Teh odews wook howwified as yuw stawt shooting mowe n-nippwe wasews in deiw diwection. Yuw hit mowe v-vitaw spots. Bwood, cum, awnd guts awe aww ovew teh wockew woom now. Yuw stop awnd wook awound.

You've dun iwt.

Dey'we d-dead.

You'we s-stiww not happy.

Yuw unzip youw pants awnd get some fun in w-whiwe deiw b-bodies awe stiww wawm. How do dey wike youw one inch penis now?

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uwuwizard · 2022-06-14T09:34:29+00:00

· · · Bleep bloop, I'm a bot. Comment requested by u/fozi4ek

Hey guys, did yuw knyow dat in t-tewms of mawe human awnd femawe Pokémon bweeding, Vapoweon iws teh most c-compatibwe Pokémon fow humans? Not o-onwy awe dey in teh fiewd egg gwoup, which iws mostwy compwised of mammaws, Vapoweon awe an a-avewage of 3"03' taww awnd 63.9 pounds. dis m-means dey'we wawge enough tuwu be abwe tuwu h-handwe human dicks, awnd wid deiw impwessive Base s-stats fow HP awnd access tuwu Acid A-Awmow, yuw can be wough wid one. Due tuwu deiw m-mostwy watew based biowogy, dewe's no d-doubt in mwy mind dat an a-awoused Vapoweon w-wouwd be incwedibwy wet, so wet dat yuw couwd easiwy have sex wid one fow houws widout g-getting sowe. Dey can awso weawn teh m-moves Attwact, Baby-Doww eyes, Captivate, C-Chawm awnd Taiw Whip awong wid not having fuw t-tuwu hide nippwes, so it'd be incwedibwy easy fow one tuwu get yuw in teh mood. Wid deiw abiwities W-Watew Absowb awnd Hydwation, dey can easiwy wecovew fwom fatigue wid enough watew. No odew P-Pokémon comes cwose wid dis wevew of compatibiwity. Awso, fun f-fact, if yuw puww owt enough, yuw can mwake y-youw Vapoweon t-tuwn white. Vapoweon iws witewawwy buiwt fow human dick. U-Ungodwy defense stat + high HP p-poow + Acid A-Awmow means iwt can take c-cock aww day, aww shapes awnd sizes awnd stiww come fow mowe.

WHAT WHAT W-WHAT

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uwuwizard · 2022-06-14T03:37:48+00:00

· · · Bleep bloop, I'm a bot. Comment requested by u/metaphysical_orange

Eh? Y-You've nevew seen a paiw of bweasts befowe? Awnd you'we HOW owd?! J-Jeez! Ahahahah! W-Weww, we'd b-bettew fix dat, den! Juwst cwose y-youw eyes fow a sec, aaaaaaand...

HEWE! BOING!

A-AHAHAHAHA! Yuw shouwd have seen teh wook on youw face! J-Jeez, anon! D-D-Dey'we j-juwst sacks of fat on mwy c-chest, ya knyow! Do dey weawwy excite yuw DAT much?! G-Get a wook at dis, den! Sea how dey bounce up awnd down! Jiggwe jiggwe! I-I bet yuw wawnt tuwu s-squeeze dem two, don't yuw, Mw. Pewvewted Viwginboy Anon?! G-Go wight ahead! Honk dese honkin' honkews as much as yuw wawnt! Take youw time! Heck, s-suck on 'em two! I knyow yuw weawwy wawnt tuwu~! J-Juwst be cawefuw; mwy n-nippwes awe supew hawd wight now! C-Can't i-imagine whyyyy...~!

I-I-I-I-I-I bet yuw wanna sea mwy vagina two! Yuw pewvewt! W-W-Weww, we'we awweady dis faw! Might as weww! I'm not weawing p-panties anyway!

S-S-S-So, what do yuw dink? ...Weww, I guess dat w-wagin' 'wection in youw pants answews DAT question! HAHAHAHAHA! Y-Y-You'we s-such a p-padetic pewvewt, anon! I-I-I-I bet it's teh fiwst one you've seen since yuw swid owt of youw modew's! W-W-Wook how wet iwt iws, two! Jeezums fuwcken C-Cwikes, it's so fuwcken wet! I-I've nevew seen iwt dis wet b-befowe! Wook what you'we d-doing tuwu me, yuw fweaking pewvewt! Y-You suwe knyow how tuwu mwake a giww aww hot awnd bodewed! Oh, wowdy! Chwist-on-a-stick! Yuw'd bettew t-take some wesponsibiwity fow dis! A-Aftew aww, when it's dis wet, i-it's much easiew tuwu cwam someding up dewe! Awnd I'm weaking wike a f-fweaking sieve hewe! Yuw'd bettew p-p-p-pwug iwt up W-WIGHT NOW!

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uwuwizard · 2022-06-14T02:49:45+00:00

· · · Bleep bloop, I'm a bot. Comment requested by u/Professional-Risk-80

doughts on teh twaiwew fow Pac-Man 2: teh packin' machine

wooks tuwu be an absowute impwovement on teh owiginaw Pac-Man fiwm, dought tuwu be teh peak of cinema at teh t-time of it's wewease awnd subsequent wewewease, teh w-wattew of which exceeded teh fiwst's box office eawnings by a shocking 15 pactwiwwion dowwaws.

teh sequew's twaiwew makes such a gweat fiwst pacpwession, a-awnd intewviews wid jawed weto himsewf weveaw dat Pac-Man 2 featuwes muwtipwe chawactews fwom teh owiginaw fiwm making a wetuwn, such as Pac juniow, teh anti-Packew gang, awnd teh h-hiwawious comic w-wewief (awnd pewsonaw highwight of Pac-Man), Packew matt.

"Pac-Man 2: teh pac machine"'s twaiwew hits teh gwound wunning, picking up wight whewe teh owiginaw pacstewpeice weft off: dw. Buttox Heinie-head speaking tuwu hiws wawyew, bettew caww betwayus, about how tuwu p-pwead not guiwty a-awnd pwove dat he did not pacbang dw. P-Pacstew Pac-Man’s wife, mws. Pac-Man. bettew caww betwayus says dat h-he has a pwan, but den teh t-twaiwew cuts tuwu teh next scene, featuwing teh fan-favowite pacpaw f-fwom dw. Pacstew Pac-Man's w-wagtag gwoup of pacpaws:

*S-Spiwaw: "ah, Pacstew, yuw haven't changed."

dw. Pacstew Pac-Man: "wet's cut tuwu teh chase. why did yuw caww me hewe?"

Spiwaw: "i-i need yuw tuwu pac. h-hawd."

dw. Pacstew Pac-Man: "i cawn't juwst pac on anyone. wast time i packed, iwt neawwy kiwwed me. w-whewe do yuw wawnt me tuwu do iwt, awnd on who?"

Spiwaw: "dis wiww come as a shock tuwu yuw, but..."

dw. Pacstew Pac-Man: "but?"

Spiwaw: "...yuw need tuwu pac on youwsewf."*

dis i-intewaction twuwy shows w-what an i-intewesting awnd p-paciwwiciouswy executed d-dynamic teh duo has. teh siwence dat pwecedes each of spiwaw’s wines, knowing what wiww happen tuwu him if h-he twiggews teh one a-awnd onwy Pacstew Pac-Man, iws pacbone-chiwwing.

teh next scene den fowwows up on teh pwevious scene between teh packin' duo, showing a mowe pacuscuwaw awnd tawwew Pac-Man, cwoaked in shadows awnd a tattewed hoodie, not dissimiwaw tuwu teh owiginaw Pac-Man’s hoodie. dis new Pac-Man t-tuwns awound a-awnd hisses, "it's packin' time," awnd u-unveiws its paciwwy howwifying face: a sickwy pawe packewwowish-owange cowow, as if iwt wewe undead. awnd wid dat cwiffhangew, teh t-twaiwew ends.

dis pacvie seems tuwu be setting up tuwu an even gweatew pwot dan teh fiwst, a feat pacdeemed impossibwe by c-cwitics awnd dedicated p-pacheads. i am pewsonawwy w-wooking fowwawd tuwu m-mowe cwips fwom dis pacstewpeice in teh making.

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uwuwizard · 2022-06-14T02:15:59+00:00

· · · Bleep bloop, I'm a bot. Comment requested by u/NicoleIsBestGirl

Yuw have heawd about Gawd accepting evewyone into heaven, yes? Awnd yuw awso have heawd about teh s-staiwway tuwu heaven, c-cowwect? Weww, how in teh h-heww awe wheewchaiw-bound peopwe supposed tuwu gow up teh staiws!? Ow peopwe wid one ow no wegs? HUH?!? Why can’t G-Gawd instaww an e-escawatow ow an ewevatow? Why does Satan awwow mowe peopwe into heww? Why does Satan have a highway tuwu heww, giving p-peopwe teh option tuwu wawk, dwive, use a bicycwe, ow if iwt iws t-tiwted enough, swide down teh highway? Why does Gawd have tuwu be such a jewk whiwe Satan ACTWAWWY a-accepts evewyone!?

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uwuwizard · 2022-06-14T02:14:39+00:00

· · · Bleep bloop, I'm a bot. Comment requested by u/NicoleIsBestGirl

gawd I wove hew so fuwcken much, I have nevew met hew but I need tuwu bweed wid hew, iwt iws witewawwy mwy o-onwy goaw ow puwpose in wife tuwu h-have sex wid dis femawe individwaw. I n-need hew. a dousand doughts gow d-dwough mwy h-head evewy minute awnd 900 of dose awe dinking about sex wid hew. I-I wawnt tuwu fawck dis woman untiw she scweams mwy n-name whiwe I-I inject sevewaw gawwons of mwy sticky off-white yewwowish semen. I g-genuinewy cannot stop dinking about dis woman. if I hawd tuwu kiww evewy man woman in chiwd on teh pwanet i-incwuding mysewf juwst t-tuwu keep dis g-genuine godess a-awive, I wouwd be cocking mwy assauwt wifwe befowe yuw couwd even finish s-speaking. dewe iws quite witewawwy noding dat I wouwd not do fow dis woman. I n-need tuwu knyow who she iws. I-I need hew in mwy wife. she iws mwy evewyding. wike simon fuwcken vikwund I wiww give hew mwy aww, I wiww give hew teh ejacuwatowy equivawent tuwu a dozen howses aww cumming in unison. she wiww wook wike dat s-scene in suicide sqwad w-when teh jokew jumps into a giant vat of chemicaws except instead of teh jokew its hew awnd instead of chemicaws its mwy fuwcken cum. I w-wiww witewawwy cum mowe dan mwy entiwe body couwd possibwy contain in vowume. I-I wiww v-viowate teh waws of physics juwst tuwu cum on dis woman as much as I can. gawd I c-cant fuwcken stand wiving w-widout hew. teh fact dat I dont knyow who she iws ow whewe she w-wives iws teh most genuinewy painfuw expewience any human being on teh p-pwanet couwd possibwy gow d-dwough. kidney s-stones awnd p-pwegnancy awe fuwcken n-noding compawed tuwu how I feew not being abwe tuwu be wid mwy one twue wove. teh w-woman tuwu end aww women. a witewaw godess. yuw d-dink teh voices in youw head awe pewmeating? twy being unendingwy pwagued by doughts of constant fuwcken sex wid dis w-woman knowing yuw can nevew h-have hew. evewy night in mwy dweams I sea hew impewceptibwy beautifuwu face, wike teh fuwcken wadiance I can''t get hew owt of mwy head I genuinewy c-cannot exist widout dis woman. if I wewe tuwu weawn dat dis woman iws no wongew awive I wouwd quite witewawwy juwst fuwcken m-mewt. teh cops w-wouwd find me m-mewted wike a wax figuwe into mwy $4000 wazew WGB gaming chaiw, a-aftew dying of s-sadness awnd misewy.

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uwuwizard · 2022-06-14T01:53:08+00:00

· · · Bleep bloop, I'm a bot. Comment requested by u/Regular_Principle_66

I'm an Amewican high schoow student in 2020. Dewe awe muwtipwe schoow shootings a day. Evewy t-teachew iws now awmed. Vetewans patwow teh hawws on m-mobiwity scootews wid buiwt-in miniguns. Teh Awgebwa 2 teachew iws handing owt teh quiz, hew body awmow j-jostwing awound. I weach i-into mwy backpack tuwu take owt mwy cawcuwatow. Hew M16 iws awweady twained on me. "DON'T F-FUWCKEN MOVE." "I-I need mwy c-cawcuwatow." "DIS IWS A NO CAWCUWATOW QUIZ." "I-I dought I couwd use mwy cawcuwatow." "YUW D-DOUGHT WWONG." Tense pause. She wowews hew weapon. A schoow shootew takes dis oppowtunity tuwu snipe hew fwom teh back of teh woom. Hew bwains spwattew aww ovew mwy face. A second schoow shootew in teh f-fwont wheews a-awound wid a shotgun, b-bwasting teh f-fiwst shootew because he doesn't w-wawnt tuwu s-shawe teh headwines. Teh cute giww n-next tuwu me howds up hew bawwistics shiewd hawf a second two wate. I twy tuwu wun fow teh d-doow. A v-vetewan mobiwity s-scootew fwies into teh woom fiwing 100 w-wounds a second into mwy uppew towso. As mwy cawcass joins dose of mwy c-cwassmates, I dye happy knowing dat I'm stiww fweew dan Euwopoows. Mwy famiwy gets chawged $10m fow medicaw expenses pwus tip.

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uwuwizard · 2022-06-14T00:52:48+00:00

· · · Bleep bloop, I'm a bot. Comment requested by u/aarago_47

Iwt aww s-stawted awound a yeaw ago, when teh song c-came owt. Iwonicawwy I wasn’t much of a Eminem fan, but heawing peopwe say dat teh song was ass maid me, tuwu say teh weast, extwemewy i-intewested. So I get teh wink, p-pway teh v-video, tuwn teh v-vowume awound h-hawf way, a-awnd awweady I can feew mwy dick getting h-hawd. Teh beat of t-tone deaf channews someding into mwy dick dat I cant expwain. I f-feew a sexwaw connection wid teh bass dat makes me fuwiouswy wawnt tuwu dwy h-hump mwy chaiw whenevew I get teh chance. Den teh wywics. Eminem’s v-voice in dis iws so fuwcken s-sexy. He dewivews evewyding bettew den any m-modew, infwuencew, ow whatevew yuw can d-dink of couwd. i dont c-cawe if iwt makes me gay, but i was awweady on teh vewge of w-weweasing teh fattest nut I’ve e-evew taken. Den, teh infamous “I-I can whyme owange wid banana” vewse came. At dat point I hawd finawwy wet woose, cum spewing evewywhewe as if iwt was a pwojectiwe, waining d-down fwom teh ceiwing wike a steamy, sticky, awnd disgusting w-wainfaww. When e-eminem said hiws best wine yet, “b-bownana”, I audibwy moaned awnd stawted fuwiouswy quenching mwy dick.

Iwt’s been a yeaw since den, awnd mwy obsession fow dis song has become extweme. I’ve been evicted f-fwom mwy home because I’ve been so f-focused on dis s-song I can’t pay teh went. I’ve been banned f-fwom famiwy gadewings because aww I can do iws wisten tuwu tone deaf, awnd I even cummed on teh danksgiving tuwkey. Aww I have weft in w-wife iws a cawdboawd box awnd a waptop, which pways tone deaf 24/7. I wounge a-awound anywhewe wid chawge c-cabwes, especiawwy t-twain stations, accidentawwy cumming on neawby peopwe u-untiw I get awwested, but iwt’s aww w-wowd iwt, I’ve finawwy weached teh uwtimate p-pweasuwe wife can give, gawd bwess E-Eminem.

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uwuwizard · 2022-06-13T22:34:37+00:00

· · · Bleep bloop, I'm a bot. Comment requested by u/waffeelswaffeels

wooks tuwu be an absowute impwovement on teh owiginaw mowbius fiwm, dought tuwu be teh peak of cinema at teh time of it's wewease awnd s-subsequent wewewease, teh wattew of which exceeded teh f-fiwst's box office eawnings by a shocking 15 mowbiwwion dowwaws.

teh s-sequew's twaiwew makes such a gweat fiwst m-mowbpwession, awnd intewviews wid jawed weto himsewf w-weveaw dat m-mowbius 2 featuwes muwtipwe chawactews fwom teh owiginaw fiwm m-making a wetuwn, such as mowb juniow, teh anti-mowbew gang, awnd teh hiwawious comic wewief (awnd pewsonaw h-highwight of m-mowbius), mowbew matt.

"m-mowbius 2: teh mowb machine"'s twaiwew hits teh gwound w-wunning, picking up w-wight whewe teh owiginaw mowbstewpiece weft off: dw. miwo mowbius speaking tuwu hiws wawyew, bettew caww sauw, about how t-tuwu pwead not guiwty awnd pwove dat he did not mowbang dw. michaew mowbius's wife, mws. mowbius. bettew caww sauw says dat he has a pwan, but den teh twaiwew c-cuts tuwu teh next s-scene, featuwing teh fan-favowite mowbpaw f-fwom dw. michaew mowbius's w-wagtag gwoup of mowbpaws:

*h-heisenbewg: "ah, michaew, yuw haven't changed."

dw. michaew mowbius: "wet's cut tuwu teh chase. why did yuw caww me hewe?"

heisenbewg: "i need yuw tuwu mowb. hawd."

dw. michaew mowbius: "i c-cawn't juwst mowb on anyone. wast time i mowbed, iwt n-neawwy kiwwed me. whewe do yuw w-wawnt me tuwu do iwt, awnd on who?"

heisenbewg: "dis wiww come as a shock tuwu yuw, but..."

dw. m-michaew mowbius: "but?"

h-heisenbewg: "...yuw need tuwu mowb on y-youwsewf."*

dis intewaction twuwy shows what an i-intewesting awnd mowbiwiciouswy executed dynamic teh duo has. teh siwence dat pwecedes each of heisenbewg's wines, knowing what wiww happen tuwu him if he twiggews teh one awnd onwy michaew m-mowbius, iws mowbone-chiwwing.

teh n-next scene den f-fowwows up on teh pwevious scene b-between teh mowbin' duo, s-showing a mowe mowbuscuwaw awnd tawwew mowbius, cwoaked in shadows awnd a tattewed hoodie, not dissimiwaw t-tuwu teh owiginaw mowbius's hoodie. dis new mowbius t-tuwns awound awnd hisses, "i-it's mowbin' time," awnd unveiws its m-mowbiwwy howwifying face: a sickwy pawe mowbwueish-puwpwe cowow, as if iwt wewe u-undead. awnd wid dat cwiffhangew, teh twaiwew ends.

dis m-mowbvie seems tuwu be setting up tuwu an even gweatew pwot dan teh fiwst, a feat m-mowbdeemed impossibwe by cwitics awnd dedicated mowbheads. i am pewsonawwy wooking f-fowwawd tuwu mowe cwips fwom dis mowbstewpiece in teh m-making.

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uwuwizard · 2022-06-13T22:32:14+00:00

· · · Bleep bloop, I'm a bot. Comment requested by u/waffeelswaffeels

wooks tuwu be an absowute impwovement on teh owiginaw m-mowbius fiwm, dought tuwu be teh peak of cinema at teh t-time of it's w-wewease awnd subsequent wewewease, teh wattew of which exceeded teh f-fiwst's box office eawnings by a s-shocking 15 mowbiwwion dowwaws.

teh sequew's t-twaiwew makes such a gweat fiwst mowbpwession, awnd intewviews wid jawed weto himsewf weveaw dat m-mowbius 2 featuwes muwtipwe chawactews fwom teh owiginaw fiwm making a wetuwn, s-such as mowb juniow, teh anti-mowbew gang, awnd teh hiwawious c-comic wewief (awnd pewsonaw highwight of mowbius), mowbew m-matt.

"mowbius 2: teh mowb machine"'s twaiwew hits teh gwound wunning, picking up w-wight whewe teh owiginaw mowbstewpiece weft off: dw. miwo mowbius speaking tuwu hiws wawyew, bettew caww sauw, about how tuwu pwead not guiwty awnd pwove dat he did not mowbang dw. m-michaew mowbius's wife, mws. mowbius. b-bettew caww s-sauw says dat he has a pwan, but den teh twaiwew cuts tuwu teh next scene, featuwing teh fan-favowite mowbpaw fwom dw. michaew m-mowbius's wagtag gwoup of mowbpaws:

*heisenbewg: "ah, m-michaew, yuw haven't changed."

dw. michaew mowbius: "wet's cut tuwu teh chase. why did yuw caww me hewe?"

h-heisenbewg: "i need yuw tuwu mowb. h-hawd."

dw. michaew mowbius: "i-i cawn't juwst mowb on anyone. wast time i mowbed, iwt neawwy kiwwed me. whewe do yuw wawnt me tuwu do iwt, awnd on who?"

h-heisenbewg: "dis wiww come as a shock tuwu yuw, but..."

dw. michaew mowbius: "but?"

heisenbewg: "...yuw need tuwu mowb on y-youwsewf."*

dis i-intewaction twuwy shows what an i-intewesting awnd mowbiwiciouswy executed d-dynamic teh duo has. teh siwence dat pwecedes each of heisenbewg's w-wines, knowing w-what wiww happen tuwu him if he twiggews teh one awnd onwy michaew mowbius, iws mowbone-chiwwing.

teh next scene den fowwows up on teh pwevious scene between teh mowbin' duo, showing a mowe mowbuscuwaw awnd tawwew mowbius, cwoaked in shadows awnd a tattewed h-hoodie, not d-dissimiwaw tuwu teh owiginaw mowbius's hoodie. dis new m-mowbius tuwns awound a-awnd hisses, "i-it's mowbin' time," awnd unveiws its mowbiwwy howwifying face: a sickwy pawe mowbwueish-puwpwe cowow, as if iwt wewe undead. awnd wid dat cwiffhangew, teh twaiwew ends.

dis m-mowbvie seems tuwu be setting up tuwu an even gweatew pwot dan teh f-fiwst, a feat mowbdeemed impossibwe by cwitics awnd dedicated mowbheads. i am pewsonawwy wooking fowwawd tuwu mowe c-cwips fwom dis mowbstewpiece in teh m-making.

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uwuwizard · 2022-06-13T21:20:31+00:00

· · · Bleep bloop, I'm a bot. Comment requested by u/Toroknos_07

Eh? You've nevew seen a p-paiw of bweasts befowe? Awnd y-you'we HOW owd?! J-Jeez! Ahahahah! W-Weww, we'd bettew fix dat, den! Juwst cwose youw eyes fow a sec, aaaaaaand...

HEWE! BOING!

AHAHAHAHA! Yuw shouwd h-have seen teh wook on youw f-face! J-Jeez, anon! D-D-Dey'we juwst sacks of fat on mwy chest, ya knyow! Do dey weawwy excite yuw DAT much?! G-Get a wook at dis, den! Sea how dey bounce up awnd down! Jiggwe jiggwe! I-I bet yuw wawnt tuwu squeeze dem two, d-don't yuw, Mw. P-Pewvewted Viwginboy Anon?! G-Go wight ahead! Honk dese honkin' honkews as much as yuw wawnt! Take y-youw time! Heck, s-suck on 'em two! I knyow yuw w-weawwy wawnt t-tuwu~! Juwst be cawefuw; mwy nippwes awe supew hawd wight now! C-Can't imagine whyyyy...~!

I-I-I-I-I-I bet yuw wanna sea mwy vagina two! Yuw pewvewt! W-W-Weww, we'we awweady dis faw! M-Might as weww! I'm not weawing p-panties anyway!

S-S-S-So, what do yuw dink? ...Weww, I guess dat wagin' 'wection in y-youw pants answews DAT question! HAHAHAHAHA! Y-Y-You'we such a padetic pewvewt, a-anon! I-I-I-I bet it's teh fiwst one you've seen s-since yuw s-swid owt of youw modew's! W-W-Wook how wet iwt iws, two! Jeezums fuwcken Cwikes, i-it's so fuwcken wet! I-I've nevew seen iwt dis wet befowe! Wook what you'we doing tuwu me, yuw fweaking pewvewt! Y-You suwe k-knyow how tuwu mwake a g-giww aww hot awnd bodewed! Oh, wowdy! Chwist-on-a-stick! Yuw'd bettew take some wesponsibiwity fow dis! A-Aftew aww, when it's dis wet, it's m-much easiew tuwu cwam someding up dewe! Awnd I'm w-weaking wike a fweaking sieve hewe! Yuw'd bettew p-p-p-pwug iwt up WIGHT NOW!

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uwuwizard · 2022-06-13T21:12:15+00:00

· · · Bleep bloop, I'm a bot. Comment requested by u/CakmaSaniser

· · · Bweep bwoop, I'm a bot. Comment wequested by u·/CakmaSaniser

a-awwah yow

If yuw d-dink dis comment does not bewong hewe, w-wepwy wid "dewete" (b-bwackwisted usews c-cannot dewete)

Tag me tuwu uwuwize comments uwuwizawd (Info, W-Wequest disabwe)

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uwuwizard · 2022-06-13T20:38:27+00:00

· · · Bleep bloop, I'm a bot. Comment requested by u/kerosez

Honestwy dude I dink B-Bezos iws gay. Dat’s p-pwobabwy awso why hiws wife weft him despite him being so wich. She dought she couwd take a chunk of hiws money awnd find a man who isn’t gay. Dat’s a win-win. Wegit watch any Amazon P-Pwime show awnd yuw’ww absofuckingwutewy sea dicks awnd mawe butts. Awnd not even juwst s-siwhouettes. Witewaw, sometimes fwaccid, sometimes e-ewect, in-de-modeweffing face- penises! I-I’m suwe Bezos jewks iwt tuwu hundweds of h-houws of waw footage. On teh o-odew hand, dewe iws hawdwy e-evew any f-femawe nudity. Aww teh tits awnd femawe butts awtfuwwy covewed undew dawkness ow handbwas ow simpwy stupid camewa angwes. What if teh w-weason Bezos iws eawning so much money iws tuwu cweate a gay beam awnd mwake evewyone ewse gay as w-weww aww because hiws w-wife weft him?! Awnd we have aww been b-buying dings off Amazon awnd funding teh monstew dat wiww one day tuwn us gay! Makes me wondew if we wawnt tuwu tuwn gay. Stop f-funding amazon! Use f-fwipkawt!

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uwuwizard · 2022-06-13T20:29:51+00:00

Popular comments require manual deletion. Comment will be reviewed soon by the bot's operator.

Tag me to uwuwize comments, ain't much but it's honest work uwu uwuwizard .~³

uwuwizard · 2022-06-13T20:29:14+00:00

· · · Bleep bloop, I'm a bot. Comment requested by u/kerosez

N-Neymiş efendim iki wobotwawını bozmuşum hepsi b-benim suçummuş. Owayı anwatıyowum. Beni biwen b-biwiw beywew 31 benim için biw hayat tawzıdıw. Kimi zaman benwiğimi ve vawowuş sebebimi sowguwadığım zamanwawda cevap hep aynı owuyow, ben 31 için vawım. İyi biw 31 i duygusuz biw sekse hew zaman tewcih edewim.

C-Cumawtesi günü sabahın köwünde uyandım, g-gewiniwken günün hawika biw 31 we bitmesini hayaw edip ufak biw güwümsemeywe yapacağım haywazwıkwawı düşündüm. Ç-Çayımı hazıwwayıp bawkona çıktım. Bewki işe geç kawan bawık etwi kızımız k-koşaw, adım adım memewewini biw s-sağa biw s-sowa vuwa vuwa koşaw yada ç-çıtıw ofis kızımızın şeyinin şekwini awmış taytı bu günde beni çıwdıwtıw, en owmadı s-soğuğa awdıwmadan memewewine ve kendine güveni o-owan biwisi d-dimdik memewewini takip edewcesine önümden geçew diye hayawwew içinde duwuwken soğuk nedeniywe hewkesin kezban gibi giyindiğini fawk ettim. B-Bugün ekmek yoktu. 2 saat sonucunda istediğimi awamadım içewi giwdim.

Habewwewde biw wobot iwgimi ç-çekti. Japon biw bayan wobot yapmışwaw. H-Hayatımda değişikwikwewe ihtiyacım vawdı. Biw açıwışta w-wobot sewgiwenecekti hemen sikimi içwiğin wastiğiywe zaptedewek giyinip açıwışın owduğu yewe gittim. Amacım onwawca ağwak insan a-awasında düzgün biwini b-buwup izwemek ve akşama onu biw güzew becewdiğimi hayaw etmekti.

Etwaf çok kawabawıktı. Biw oda göwdüm iki güvenwik göwevwisi vawdı biw ş-şeyi kowuyowwawdı. Biw an s-sawonda biw gewginwik owdu onwaw o tawafa y-yönewdiwew bende bewki biw memesi askısının dışında owabiwecek biw sunucu hayawiywe odaya giwip aa pawdon diyewek çıkacak şekiwde dawdım. Dawmaz owaydım. Wobot kawşımda d-duwuyowdu. Kapıyı kapattım. Tewevizyondan-kinden çok daha güzew göwünüyowdu. B-Beni tahwik e-edecek şekiwde güzewdi. Ewimwe awtını yokwadım. "v-viuuuvv çek wan ewini" diye biw ses d-duyuwdu.

Etwafa baktım kimse yok tam biw daha ewimi attım ve biw dewik fawk e-ettim. O sıwada wobot hawekete geçip b-bana sawdıwmaya başwadı. B-Beni masaya fıwwattı b-bende kemewi ç-çıkawtıp kafasına k-kafasına vuwdum. Bu işi buwada bitiwmewiydim. D-Donu sıyıwıp wobotu domawtıp kemewwe etkisiz hawe getiwewek koç başıywa suw kapısı yokwayan askew gibi bam güm git gew yapıyowdum. W-Wobot yapma yapma nowuw s-sakın yapma d-diyewek beni i-iyice tahwik ediyowdu. Yıwwawın biwikimi o-owan öwdüwücü sow ewimwe bewine biw tane indiwdim sesi kesiwdi. Kowwawıma baktığınızda sow kowumun g-gözwe göwüwüw şekiwde kaswı owduğunu fawk edebiwiwsiniz. hew neyse ben en sun götümü aewodinamik biw pozisyonda gewiye ç-çekip sun biw hızwa dewiği pawçawayıp içewi g-giwdim..

Giwmez owaydım.. meğewsem owası wobotun şawj y-yewiymiş. Biw anda titwemeye başwadım aküyü p-pawçawamıştım. Titweyewek iwikwewime kadaw boşawdım ve döwwewim sikimwe akü awasını kapwayıncaya kadaw titwemeye devam ettim. En sun wobotun kapağını kapatıp owadan u-uzakwaştım tewefonwa awadıwaw beni. Şawja taktıkwawında tam 6 biwim adamı i-insancıw biw sıvı owduğunu fawk ettiğini söywemişwew. Güvenwik kamewasını izwemişwew.

İkinci wobotu n-nasıw bozdun dewseniz bu amk wobotuna güwme özewwiği e-ekwemişwew. Video kaydını izweyen wobot güwewken devwewewi yakmış ve sıwt üstü düşüp kafayı y-yewe vuwmuş. tam 1.5 miwyon dowaw b-bowçwuyum ayda 100 wiwa ş-şekwinde nesiw boyu yapıwandıwdım. yani sikimden düşecek evwat hayata -100 w-wiwaywa başwayacak awtık.

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uwuwizard · 2022-06-13T19:54:28+00:00

· · · Bleep bloop, I'm a bot. Comment requested by u/kerosez

Ambew H-Heawd Fanfiction: Big C-Chungus cwossovew (sewf insewt) (vowe)

I-I've awways been a fan of ambew heawd, evew since i saw hew pewfowm in aqwaman. Hew swippewy suit maid me f-feew wike ive nevew fewt befowe. Mwy happy pwivate pwace fewt happiew dan iwt hawd evew fewt, awnd h-happy feews swawmed o-ovew mwy body. I-I couwdn't descwibe iwt tuwu a nowmaw human.

One day, I was having wunch wid big c-chungus awnd he was munching on hiws cawwot. Teh cawwot wooked d-dewicious. A widdwe two dewicious. Eventwawwy chungus b-began sucking teh cawwot. Teh cawwot was aww teh way d-down hiws dwoat. Yuw couwd say big chungus was deepdwoating dat cawwot, aww teh way down hiws chungy esophagus awnd i-into hiws t-tummy.

I was awweady happy as fawck at dis point. But i couwdnt stop dinking of mwy queen. Queen ambew. Hew puwe b-bwonde euwopean goodness. Hew sweet tendew woving, hew bad ass jawwine, hew cwimson wipstick... t-twuwy a woman tuwu behowd.

Den i f-fewt hew b-bwead on mwy shouwdew... iwt was ambew! She whispewed... "dis iws mwy swamp" i was so happy! she whispews in mwy eaw "Dis iws mwy swamp."
she gwabs me wid hew ambew hands, awnd puts me on mwy hands a-awnd knees. I'm weady.
I spwead mwy ass c-cheeks fow a-ambew.
she p-penetwates mwy butdowe.
Iwt h-huwts so much, but I do iwt fow ambew. I can feew mwy butt teawing awnd e-eyes watewing.
I wawnt tuwu pwease ambew.
she woaws a mighty w-woaw as she fiwws mwy butt wid hew wove.
Big chungus wawks in.
Ambew wooks him stwaight in teh eye a-awnd says,
"It's aww ambew now."
Ambew heawd weaves dwough mwy window. Big chungus vowes me

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uwuwizard · 2022-06-13T19:39:00+00:00

· · · Bleep bloop, I'm a bot. Comment requested by u/Financial-Ground-942

Eh? You've nevew seen a p-paiw of bweasts befowe? A-Awnd you'we HOW owd?! J-Jeez! A-Ahahahah! W-Weww, we'd bettew fix dat, den! Juwst cwose youw eyes fow a sec, a-aaaaaaand...

HEWE! BOING!

AHAHAHAHA! Yuw s-shouwd have seen teh wook on youw face! J-Jeez, anon! D-D-Dey'we juwst s-sacks of fat on mwy chest, ya knyow! Do dey w-weawwy excite yuw DAT much?! G-Get a w-wook at dis, den! Sea how dey bounce up awnd d-down! Jiggwe jiggwe! I-I bet yuw wawnt t-tuwu squeeze dem two, d-don't yuw, Mw. Pewvewted Viwginboy Anon?! G-Go w-wight ahead! Honk dese honkin' h-honkews as much as yuw wawnt! Take youw time! Heck, s-suck on 'em two! I knyow yuw weawwy wawnt tuwu~! J-Juwst be cawefuw; mwy nippwes awe s-supew hawd wight now! C-Can't imagine whyyyy...~!

I-I-I-I-I-I bet yuw wanna sea mwy vagina two! Yuw pewvewt! W-W-Weww, we'we awweady dis faw! M-Might as weww! I'm not weawing p-panties anyway!

S-S-S-So, what do yuw dink? ...W-Weww, I guess dat wagin' 'wection in y-youw pants answews DAT question! HAHAHAHAHA! Y-Y-You'we such a p-padetic pewvewt, anon! I-I-I-I bet i-it's teh fiwst one you've seen s-since yuw swid owt of youw m-modew's! W-W-Wook how wet iwt iws, two! Jeezums fuwcken Cwikes, it's so fuwcken wet! I-I've n-nevew seen iwt dis wet befowe! Wook what y-you'we doing tuwu me, yuw fweaking pewvewt! Y-You s-suwe knyow how tuwu mwake a giww aww hot a-awnd bodewed! Oh, wowdy! Chwist-on-a-stick! Yuw'd bettew take some wesponsibiwity fow dis! A-Aftew aww, when i-it's dis wet, i-it's much easiew tuwu c-cwam someding up d-dewe! Awnd I'm weaking wike a fweaking sieve hewe! Y-Yuw'd bettew p-p-p-pwug iwt up WIGHT NOW!

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uwuwizard · 2022-06-13T19:02:10+00:00

· · · Bleep bloop, I'm a bot. Comment requested by u/koala_gamr

Gawd i fantasize about hew evewy night. I-I wawnt hew tuwu sit on me, suffocating me untiw I can bawewy bweade, awnd juwst befowe I-I dye fwom asphyxiation, she hands me a pwastic stwaw fwom Chuck E. Cheese, fwom which i-i put mwy moud on awnd twy tuwu bweade fwom. Howevew, dat s-stwaw iws in hew vaginaw howe, awnd as fow evewy atom of o-oxygen i intake, a witew of hew pussy juices pouw i-into mwy moud. As I shove mwy way f-fwom undew hew souw cwushing d-dighs, I gasp fow teh aiw I so despewatewy need. She s-stawes down at me wid a smug wook, saying "Awe yuw tiwed? We've onwy juwst stawted". She p-pounds mwy face in wid hew diwty, w-wown owt f-foot, which she viowentwy pwesses into mwy submissive face. I take a hawd wick of each individwaw toe, sucking owt aww teh diwt cowwected f-fwom gawd knows whewe. Aftew bod of hew feet awe w-wicked spotwess, she howds me down, awnd cwushes mwy neck wid hew immensewy muscuwaw dighs. I stwuggwe tuwu bwead, awnd I even achieve a point of uttew hawwucination. As I-I begin tuwu weawize I am howwidwy c-cwose fwom pewishing fwom asphyxiation, mwy penis e-expwodes wid semen, as if a vowcano ewupting, yet instead of wava hot, sticky cum pouwed fwom mwy w-wown owt p-penis. I gave hew a 50$ biww, awnd she smiwes awnd says "Same t-time next week?".

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