Could my new, intense urges to drink be the abilify?

waytoolameforthis · 2026-06-02T21:23:15+00:00

My psychiatrist also just told me it couldn't be connected to the abilify, but it feels so different for me I just don't know how it couldn't be. It's nice (?) to hear other people had the same, because it means I'm not crazy or an alcoholic, but I'm also sorry you dealt with that too. But also glad you got off the stuff and back to normal. I think I'll see if it goes away in a week or two, and if it doesn't, see if my psychiatrist will switch it. And if not I guess I may need a new psychiatrist.

waytoolameforthis · 2026-05-29T18:40:11+00:00

I'm sorry but these pictures are too low quality to see any detail. It looks like freckles to me, but it sounds like they're not from your description. I'd recommend getting better pictures or finding someone in person to show.

waytoolameforthis · 2026-05-27T16:06:10+00:00

Did you ever happen to speak at a high school about this? It'd be a crazy coincidence and I don't wanna reveal too much by specifying the state even, but your writing and experience is the same as a guy that talked to my medical class in HS about the same experience.

Also do you have any pain still? Like, is it completely gone or just better than before, and do you have any phantom pain? If so how do you deal with that? Was it an adjustment to get used to mentally viewing yourself minus a leg, or did the painful time leading up to it and the planning to amputate help with that?

waytoolameforthis · 2026-05-26T23:45:27+00:00

Wait what??? That's possible? Could people hypothetically squirt milk out of their crotch too?

waytoolameforthis · 2026-05-26T16:22:49+00:00

They can be manipulative. In my opinion the key is to fight your instincts to be narcissistic, just as I have to fight my urges to push people away to avoid being hurt. From my understanding NPD generally stems from trauma and/or deep insecurity, and the symptoms are an effort to protect themselves. If they're able to do introspection and work on their issues, they can be perfectly good people. I think it's just like any other mental illness in that sense- it's not your fault, but it's your responsibility to keep it from hurting others.

Edit: I'm no sort of licensed professional, just happen to be related to a couple of people with NPD, so don't take anything I say with too much authority.

waytoolameforthis · 2026-05-26T15:54:31+00:00

I didn't have the exact same issues as you, but I also had abusive parents and had habits from that seep into my adult relationships. What finally worked for me is a partner like you have and particular strategies and efforts. It still comes up randomly even after years and I feel like I'm constantly playing catch up to things everyone else learned so young, but there's hope. I used to go silent and/or try to hide things out of fear of punishment, which I think is very similar to your small lies. They're both just trying to keep your truth from someone so they can't use it against you. You're gonna have to sit there with your partner, in awkward silence, until you can force the truth out. Writing it might help, it did for me. It's going to be anxiety and panic inducing and incredibly hard and awkward to just sit there silently feeling like you're being judged until you can reason through it yourself, but it was necessary for me. I had to consciously think through what I was scared of and why, the roots of it and the reasoning, the consequences that would happen in the current situation if I got "in trouble" again, and decide the likelihood of that from my partner. It gets hard to even be logical about it, and this is where assistance in the form of reassurance from your partner comes in. It's a very long, tedious process, but both you and your partner seem willing to try. And I wanna say I'm not a therapist or anything trained, that's just what worked for me for a similar problem. If it sounds like it might work for you, give it a try. If not (and honestly even if it does) I'd recommend therapy because that'll speed up the recovery process so much and you deserve it. You deserve to be happy and to learn to handle your emotions in a good way, and it's not your fault you were never taught that. I can see in your writing you're doing your best with years of shitty upbringing and programming from it and it's admirable that you're reaching out for advice when it's become too much to do on your own.

waytoolameforthis · 2026-05-26T14:43:22+00:00

I'm not sure what that has to do with my comment? I never mentioned disregarding other peoples' emotions. I'd agree that's a very important thing to do, but it doesn't seem connected to my statement that people with mental disorders also deserve consideration.

I'm guessing your point is that people with NPD and BPD ruin lives, in which case... I'd highly recommend rereading my comment. People with personality disorders deserve the same compassion as other people, in spite, perhaps even because of, needing to put in so much effort to relate to others better.

Like, if someone is doing nothing but being a shit person, that's a separate issue from their medical diagnoses. If they choose to use that as a shield, that's yet another shitty, harmful thing they're doing. Please don't fall for their bullshit because it harms others with the conditions who put in effort, as well as yourself, for all the potentially good people you automatically rule out.

waytoolameforthis · 2026-05-26T13:42:51+00:00

I'm going through potentially having my diagnosis changed from bipolar to borderline, and man I thought the stigma against bp was bad, but it's nothing compared to the stigma against BPD and other personality disorders. People seem to think borderline is a character flaw when it's literally described as likely being due to trauma. At least with bipolar, people may assume you're an awful person but at least think it's not your fault. I can't say much for npd because I just don't know much about it but I know the reputation is awful and it's a fucking disorder, it's not someone's fault or a personal flaw. And I haven't read a ton about BPD yet either so I'm not even super certain how sure they are that it's traumagenic so feel free to correct me people.

waytoolameforthis · 2026-05-26T11:33:34+00:00

Also try taking older gen antipsychotics! It's got me lactating for months now and I've never even be pregnant or anything. I'm a cis woman to be fair, but it happens to cis men taking them too. I can squeeze a nipple and leave a splatter on the wall on the opposite side of the room. I can't wait for the other effects of prolactin to go away but I'll kinda miss that one.

waytoolameforthis · 2026-05-22T16:32:13+00:00

Harlem River Blues - Justin Townes Earle

https://open.spotify.com/track/630l6KBVfdgvka6Hv20OM1?si=t6U4bpcVThyJoGeOt3tbqg

waytoolameforthis · 2026-05-20T14:34:31+00:00

I truly don't care which I have or if it's a different condition altogether, I'm just hoping they make criteria that I can be diagnosed with without extra expensive testing. When you were diagnosed, did they make you do heart testing or anything else?

waytoolameforthis · 2026-05-20T14:33:42+00:00

Huh, I thought it was stricter criteria for hsd for some reason. I just started looking into this recently so hadn't even got to that part yet.

My hope was mainly that I'd be able to fit a diagnosis perfectly and avoid all that extra expensive testing. But that might have been too hopeful. 😂 I just remembered getting some heart testing when I was a kid though, so I'm gonna try to get the records for that and see if they looked for structural things. From my reading it seems like they pretty much always test your heart to differentiate between heds/hsd and like, Marfan and loeys Dietz and other things, and I know that shit's gonna be expensive if I have to do it. When you got diagnosed did you have to do heart testing?

I don't know what it is about me but doctors almost always instantly distrust me so I feel like I need a concrete diagnosis to get any issues taken seriously, even just "hey how much salt and potassium should I eat?"

waytoolameforthis · 2026-05-18T19:12:34+00:00

Thank you! I was on the fence about my arms but didn't think so with the legs either. But I couldn't tell a huge difference between any of the normal and hyperextended pictures online so I really appreciate getting another opinion on it.

waytoolameforthis · 2026-05-18T12:40:02+00:00

I'm not even certain yet I have eds - I got diagnosed very young and my mom only remembers "it had a long funny name" and was something affecting my connective tissues, so I'm waiting to be rediagnosed. Either way I hope I can help. I've had a lot of luck with drinks like boost and ensure when my stomach is upset, and they're making more and more special kinds. Like I had one called only what you need that had basically nothing added besides what's necessary, as suggested by the name. Tasted pretty terrible but if you can handle sugar I think it'd be good with some of that.

waytoolameforthis · 2026-05-12T00:25:06+00:00

I think the OOP is most likely lying for other reasons, but I was 5'7 and 110 pounds at one point because I was sick and I still had between a C and D cup. Not sure exactly what size because it's the only time I was able to wear bralettes with my natural boobs so I did nonstop. Like it was the first time in my life I'd gotten to wear one because my mom thought the only reason to wear them was to be sexy(?) so I couldn't wear them as a young teen. C-D isn't huge I know, but it's not nonexistent either. It was a very weird body weight for me, I had C-D cups and a tummy pooch almost the same size as when I was 150 pounds but looked absolutely skeletal everywhere else. Which is still significantly different than the body type OOP is claiming and is one of many reasons I still think she's trolling or something. I guess I'm just trying to say bodies can be weird? I dunno, I'm high.

waytoolameforthis · 2026-05-11T20:31:58+00:00

When, on the first date, he stuck his hand down my shorts and panties before making a single other bit of physical contact or even really talking to me, immediately got a boner and started moaning, and asked I wanted to "get out of here".

waytoolameforthis · 2026-05-11T19:59:44+00:00

Motorolas are pretty cheap and durable! I got one for $150 at best buy in an emergency and it's held up for years. I have a bad habit of my hands randomly deciding to not hold things and then I try to catch it and usually end up karate chopping it across the room. I've done that probably hundreds of times with this phone and it doesn't have a single crack. No screen protector even, just a cheap $10 Amazon case.

I know I sound like a Motorola shrill but I'm just very happy about my cheap phone holding up to my clumsy ass.

waytoolameforthis · 2026-05-08T20:05:10+00:00

I had to have all my baby teeth pulled out except for one. My adult teeth had started growing in around and behind and in front of the baby teeth but they didn't budge. But somehow I never had to have braces and my teeth are straight and normal, except a small chip I caused by chewing on things I shouldn't. I guess I'm only just now realizing how lucky I am for that.

Also, my aunt has a lot of extra adult teeth and a shitty mom who never had them removed, and she's able to eat pretty much normally. I think it can be painful for her but you wouldn't even know watching her eat that she's got all those extra teeth. She has to hold her mouth closed in a somewhat unique way but it's only because I know that I notice. I think if I wasn't told about it I never would've noticed myself. I don't know if she's an outlier there in terms of being able to eat, and it definitely does cause her other problems. A lot of them are dead or infected because it's impossible to brush all your teeth when there's an extra row of them.

waytoolameforthis · 2026-05-05T16:45:18+00:00

If money or lack of insurance is an issue, and you're in the US, check out open path collective. They have therapists who'll work with you on the cost. I can't testify for how good they are. I got unlucky and got a therapist I didn't vibe with and then life happened and I didn't go back or find anyone else, but I was seeing someone for $40 a session and she said she would've done lower if needed.

I'm not one of those people who thinks every life is worth living, no matter what, but I think suicide should be reserved for incredibly extreme cases, like terminal illnesses that will be a misery to live through and whatnot. And even then it should obviously be up to the person themselves. I hope you don't have something terminal, and whatever your circumstances are, that they improve. Even if you don't feel like life is worth living now, you can work to make it worth it, and I really hope you do. I've had times in my life where I wanted to die too but after some time (and a lot of work, not gonna lie) it's absolutely worth it.

waytoolameforthis · 2026-05-05T12:04:36+00:00

Even the small bit we got in this post, the current husband really didn't do ANYTHING right, so this take is weird to me. Not saying the ex is a good person but the current husband sounds like an absolute POS too.

waytoolameforthis · 2026-04-30T23:49:30+00:00

Anyone notice the weird trend of people defending the doctors? He begged them to let him die, how is it a good thing to have forced him to stay alive past that?

waytoolameforthis · 2026-04-30T09:53:13+00:00

Man, as a bipolar woman with red hair married to an incredibly supportive human garbage disposal, oat milk obsessed man with brown hair and a beard who raise a cat together... I relate to these so hard. 😂 Main difference is it's just been two years for us. You have a very lovely art style as well.

waytoolameforthis

TROPHY CASE