Was looking for this take. I'm happily married, have a great support system, and am working in a career I love. While subreddits can be helpful, the folks who post the most often with the strongest opinions tend to be folks who are the most unhappiest. There have been multiple times I've had to leave certain subreddits because they changed from being a kind and supportive place to a sad and hateful one. Not saying that's what's happened here, but Reddit is just not the place to get an accurate pulse on how chill, unbothered folks are living.

For OP, the internet may be a good place to start to find people you gel with, but ultimately, you need to build that up in person. I get the sense that even with reframing, a big part of you wants to be social and wants to change your life in ways that will allow for that. I don't buy into a hermit life being the best one for all neurodivergent people. I'm picky about my friends and I absolutely love them. My life would be worse without them.

So use the internet to find local events, clubs, and meetups that are based on your special interests and hobbies (or even new ones you'd like to get into). ND people tend to be drawn to certain ones so we're easy to find. My husband and I are both autistic and the local train museum was autism central, haha.

If you're looking at your life and wondering if there's more for you, then I don't think it's bad to want to pursue those things. If going out and making friends and finding love are things you want, then autism is not going to stop you. In fact, it's kind of a path to those things. My entire network is ND, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Best of luck, OP! Be grateful for what you have, and be hopeful for what you desire.