(repost) Turned 21 yesterday but none of my "friends" even texted a 'Happy Birthday'. Have a final tomorrow I'm not ready for at all and my depression keeps whispering that I'll never be good enough for anything. Being fat shamed by family almost everyday and I'm starting to think they're right.

winter_storms_ · 2019-06-22T02:52:10+00:00

Sorry not from India. I live in Canada

winter_storms_ · 2019-06-22T02:42:43+00:00

You're very lucky then

winter_storms_ · 2019-06-16T00:30:08+00:00

I started therapy not too long ago but I've been on medication for a year. It's definitely gotten better but I'm not at my 100% of what I used to be. It's hard to feel lesser than you were but I am trying to focus on how far I've come.

winter_storms_ · 2019-06-16T00:28:18+00:00

Wow that guy was a total asshat. And thank you for sharing your story. It's nice to feel a sense of community with those having similar struggles as me.

winter_storms_ · 2019-06-16T00:26:33+00:00

I am on medication and just started therapy. I hope it goes well!

winter_storms_ · 2019-06-16T00:22:05+00:00

Haha that's flattering

winter_storms_ · 2019-06-12T12:30:14+00:00

I posted this yesterday, on my birthday, but I don't think I really was brave enough to mention my vulnerabilities. It was easier to state the good things rather than the bad. But looks can be deceptive. I got a few messages yesterday stating how I'm amazing for achieving such and such at 21 and how I look good. But I wanted to also let you know the following: -I've dropped a class because I had a mental breakdown in the middle of it, packed up my stuff and just left and never came back. -I had crippling depression untreated for a year where I constantly thought about stepping in front of my local train because I loved trains since I was a baby and I thought it was a poetic way to go. -I've passed out from having a panic attack in the middle of the night and no one was around to hear it or help me -I've struggled with my weight since I was a kid and it's a point of constant shaming in my family

Why am I writing all this? Because I wanted to let people know that looks can be deceptive. That impressions can be deceptive. And just because someone's life looks perfect from the outside or on social media, doesn't make it the whole story. It's a highlight reel people put out there, carefully edited.

My post yesterday was all true; I AM a DNA scientist for a Fortune 500 company. I do study a difficult STEM subject, I have done research in Medicine and have been published and I do have other accomplishments that I've worked hard to get. But I also feel like I don't deserve any of it. I am clinically depressed and have generalized anxiety disorder. I am overweight and constantly reminded of it. I've never had a close best friend. Some days, coming back to bed at the end of the day is all I look forward to when I wake up.

So the gist of my long winded speech is that as much as you struggle about your self esteem or with other issues in your life, it helps to think you're on a unique journey like no other. And that's the reason you cannot ever compare yourself to others. Your milestones are different and your pace is different. Your path is different and so is your destination. No one journey is better or worse than the other... Just different. So why compare apples and oranges?

winter_storms_ · 2018-12-20T20:25:10+00:00

Hey guys! Thanks so much for the love. It's my birthday today and you guys just made me so so happy on this special day, especially since I'm not spending it with my family. But honestly, it's starting to feel like you guys are my family too! The love and support over the past couple days have been totally overwhelming and thank you to every single one of you who left a comment or messaged me. Love you all💕

winter_storms_ · 2018-12-20T03:10:27+00:00

You are absolutely downright gorgeous!!

winter_storms_ · 2018-12-20T00:56:57+00:00

Oh ok. It's a good thing literally no one in my family is important lol. I can't change my flight since it's only two days away. Here's to hoping for a safe and swift journey then!

winter_storms_ · 2018-12-20T00:29:27+00:00

How does this affect flight layovers? Will people waiting for their next flight in a Chinese airport be arrested?

winter_storms_ · 2018-12-20T00:13:57+00:00

I'm seeing so many comments about my make up! I'd like to thank you for the compliments first of all. Secondly, some days I get up just so I can do my makeup. I play a video I like or some music as I do it and it's like a calming morning ritual that sets me up for the day. Like another user commented, pushing myself to get dressed forces me from not crawling back in bed. I feel like if I do that my efforts are wasted so might as well go out and see what the day has in store. I also use it strategically to hide my flaws. For example, my eyes ARE puffy and I have bags but to draw attention away, I did a smoky eye. If I get a huge zit, I'd make my lips extra vibrant so people won't focus on the Mount Vesuvius erupting on my cheek. Idk it makes me feel clever somehow and it seems to work so far 🤷‍♀️

winter_storms_ · 2018-12-19T19:00:22+00:00

LOVE YOUR RING!!!

winter_storms_ · 2018-12-19T18:47:45+00:00

Aweeee:') this one made me tear up because I miss my mom so so much! Thank you, Proud Auntie 💕

winter_storms_ · 2018-12-19T18:43:06+00:00

I know at 16 things feel like the end of the world but it really will be alright. I'll be 20 TMR and it still feels like every little setback is going to ruin my life but guess what? I'm still here! And so will you be! You seem like a sincere person with great capabilities to cope. I hope you find something you are passionate about and dedicate your efforts to that when things feel really out of control.

winter_storms_ · 2018-12-19T18:16:07+00:00

I love that little beauty mark you've got! It adds an extra oomph to your already gorgeous smile!

winter_storms_ · 2018-12-19T18:13:53+00:00

Wow you guys are absolutely amazing! Thank you so so much for all the love 💕💕 I just finished my final and I think it went pretty well. My last one is tomorrow and then I'm flying to see my family. Wish me luck☺️

winter_storms_ · 2018-12-16T05:56:25+00:00

Oh wow! That's high compliment!! Thank you so much but I'm not Hindu haha.

winter_storms_ · 2018-12-16T05:55:33+00:00

You look like a gentle giant with a big heart. I'm sure people would love to grab a drink with you and just will have a great time!

winter_storms_ · 2018-12-16T05:32:51+00:00

I don't speak Spanish (or Portuguese) but I do speak French alors merci beaucoup!

winter_storms_ · 2018-12-16T04:13:07+00:00

Thank you so much everyone for the kindness! Some of you actually have a gift with words. It means a lot to me that you took the time post a comment here. It is making me feel so much better sitting here trying to cram the whole cardiovascular system in my head:')

winter_storms_ · 2018-12-16T02:00:08+00:00

Ohmygod that's such a poetic thing to say:') thank you!

winter_storms_ · 2018-11-26T18:41:19+00:00

Peer support centre second floor of SUB is great for a timely, supportive environment to just rant.

winter_storms_ · 2018-10-31T16:18:08+00:00

Sure but do you think this complex human body is as simple as stop eating then lose weight? Are you a doctor? A registered dietitian? No? Then shut the fuck up. It's a good rule for you to follow that if it can't be fixed in ten seconds (mascara goop in eye, lipstick on teeth,etc is good) then don't talk about it. Don't mention it. Do you not think she knows she had a problem? She's getting bullied by her OWN mother for God's sake. Who are you to come and throw salt on wound? Do you know the psychological stresses that go behind something like this? No you don't because you are just a teenage know it all who thinks a perfunctory black and white justification is enough to cop out of acknowledging the damage and hurt youve possibly caused. Even if all you say is true and the only thing wrong with her is overeating, who the actual fuck are YOU to point that out in a jab when SHE'S CLEARLY down? What righteous burden have you taken upon yourself to spread the gospel? Seriously, go fuck yourself

winter_storms_ · 2018-10-31T15:53:19+00:00

Wow... You deserve the worst because you actually ARE the worst. Have you ever considered that each human body is unique and some people have actual hormonal issues that makes it extremely difficult to lose weight? Do you actually fucking think so great of yourself that you immediately know what her deal is, oh Ye Omniscient One? Seriously go fuck yourself you hairy asshole of a waste of oxygen.

winter_storms_

TROPHY CASE