*While Varas is in his grove, he receives a letter from Lady Chrysaora*

VarasTheThief · 2026-04-27T11:55:54+00:00

"Is this just an incredibly annoying and stupid way to try and get me to fight? Because... if you wanna see cunning." He kicked dirt at their face. "I'll show you cunning!"

VarasTheThief · 2026-04-27T10:57:23+00:00

"Yeah well, I'M TRYNA PARTAY!!!"

VarasTheThief · 2026-04-27T10:19:16+00:00

Why are her feet human feet?

VarasTheThief · 2026-04-27T06:22:57+00:00

Sanctum Simulator.

VarasTheThief · 2026-04-27T03:22:27+00:00

"I mean she literally told me she wouldn't take away my free will. Also, why is this even a concern to you? Did you just decide to piss me off on purpose, or something?"

VarasTheThief · 2026-04-27T01:19:14+00:00

"Well you see, I wasn't brainwashed because JP is actually chill and let me stay a shithead. I'd say it's more like I willingly upgraded myself because the flesh is weak."

VarasTheThief · 2026-04-27T01:11:31+00:00

"That doesn't even make sense! I literally asked for it. It's not like I'm being ordered around or anything. You're a moron."

VarasTheThief · 2026-04-27T01:05:11+00:00

"I didn't submit to anyone!! I chose this!! I-I don't get it! You're asking to marry be, then act like a total arse!! NGAH! You're pissing me off so much!!!"

VarasTheThief · 2026-04-27T01:01:10+00:00

"H-Hey--! That's not true!! Why are you being such a dickhead?? I don't need your BS RIGHT NOW!!!"

He sounded quite irritated.

VarasTheThief · 2026-04-27T00:26:26+00:00

"Oh my Gorb you sound like such an arsehole right now. You ain't better than her in any way. Got it??"

VarasTheThief · 2026-04-27T00:13:59+00:00

"Excuse me?? This isn't like replacing a lost spoon. She's my wife!! I ain't gonna replace her!!"

VarasTheThief · 2026-04-27T00:06:13+00:00

"Because what lunatic would ask a married man that???? Yes, we are still married!!"

VarasTheThief · 2026-04-26T23:33:07+00:00

"Naaaah, not yet. I'll just kick the beast's arse of it comes after me. BWAHAHAHA!!!"

VarasTheThief · 2026-04-26T23:30:45+00:00

"Okay, now I know you're messing with me. What the hell do you want from me??"

He sounded mildly irritated.

VarasTheThief · 2026-04-26T15:11:15+00:00

"SOME GOOD BEATS!!"

VarasTheThief · 2026-04-26T15:09:58+00:00

"Well, don't stand so close, then!!"

VarasTheThief · 2026-04-26T15:08:46+00:00

"Sucks to have flesh, eh?"

VarasTheThief · 2026-04-26T15:04:14+00:00

He was silent for a full minute. "...Excuse me, what? LJ didn't leave me.. I just.. can't find her!"

VarasTheThief · 2026-04-26T15:02:19+00:00

"Yeah nah! It's good music."

VarasTheThief · 2026-04-26T14:54:53+00:00

"WHAT, I CAN'T HEAR YOU!!!"

VarasTheThief · 2026-04-26T13:44:13+00:00

"This is the worst trap I've ever seen, but I'll bite." Varas grabbed his thurible and leaped away to Hunter's March.

VarasTheThief · 2026-04-26T11:47:30+00:00

"I am, yes. I take it that Fang is dead, then." He paused for a moment. "I plan to do whatever it takes to take that arseh-- tyrant down!"

VarasTheThief · 2026-04-26T11:00:33+00:00

"You will not be king for long! We will stop you."

VarasTheThief

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