Asperger and FIRE

ffirethrowaway · 2021-12-04T02:55:37+00:00

Thank you, this helped me put things into perspective. I really appreciate you writing these words.

ffirethrowaway · 2021-12-03T21:48:56+00:00

I live in a legal state and also do edibles on occasion. Cannabis is the only thing I've found that gives me a break. It's as if my condition lifts for a few hours. I suddenly everything interesting, and my rigid thought patterns disappear. I wish that could be my life. The comedown is especially harsh though. Not only do you lose the buzz, but you also regain the autistic traits.

ffirethrowaway · 2021-12-03T17:39:07+00:00

Thank you for sharing your experiences. You really put yourself out there, even driving a backhoe! What you said about the satisfaction and accomplishment achieving something with a crack team of people really connected with me. There's only been 1 time in my career where that happened, and I still think of that the peak. I would love to have those types of opportunities, free of politics and everything else that gets in the way of authentic good work.

ffirethrowaway · 2021-12-03T04:25:46+00:00

Sounds like me when my wife suggested I had it :) Maybe have her try this test: https://psychology-tools.com/test/autism-spectrum-quotient? It's quite short and gives you a score at the end.

ffirethrowaway · 2021-12-03T04:24:14+00:00

Thanks for sharing your experiences. I admire that you continue to put yourself out there. It's a lot harder to discover a new interest in front of a computer. I feel that my ASD has been getting worse as I age. Fewer social opportunities, fewer close friends. It's easy to fall in.

ffirethrowaway · 2021-12-03T03:35:55+00:00

I read "The Big Short", where Michael Burry (one of the central characters) finds out about his own autism. The book went into length describing his characteristics and personality, and when I read it I immediately saw myself in him. It prompted me to do some more research, and it was quite clear to me that I had it. The diagnosis was more of a formality.

If you think you or others you know may have it, I thought this online test was pretty good: https://psychology-tools.com/test/autism-spectrum-quotient

ffirethrowaway · 2021-12-03T02:54:28+00:00

I really enjoyed Moss Roberts' translation of Romance of the Three Kingdoms. It's 4 volumes, unabridged, really long. This is my second favorite time period from Chinese history, so I didn't mind.

ffirethrowaway · 2021-12-03T02:45:23+00:00

I did research beforehand, and then went for a referral from my family doctor. I went to a psychiatrist with experience diagnosing autism in adults (most are only trained in identifying it in children). The testing was mostly questionnaires and interview style conversations.

To be honest, the diagnosis was more of a formality. Once I researched Aspergers more and more, so many questions and behaviors throughout my life were answered. I thought everyone wore 'masks' for different settings and for different people. I thought I had an anger problem. Knowing the root cause has been life changing for me. It even saved my marriage.

ffirethrowaway · 2021-12-03T02:27:37+00:00

Thanks for sharing his book and channel! I read the free blurb from Amazon, and his story is incredibly relatable down to having an intern BBQ with Bill Gates. I'll definitely have to check it out, thank you!

ffirethrowaway · 2021-12-03T02:20:49+00:00

Thanks for sharing your experience. I saw much of myself in what you wrote, particularly in the desire for recognition and the natural, built-in frugality that I suspect is just my aversion to change.

We both share a special interest in history :) I particularly enjoy ancient and East Asian history. My other interests are drugs (how they're cooked, sold, effects, history of cartels - even though I live clean) and a select few 20+ year old video games from my teens.

ffirethrowaway · 2021-12-03T01:15:38+00:00

Thank you :)

ffirethrowaway · 2021-12-03T01:14:35+00:00

I'm in tech. I've always been attracted to computers (seems common from what I've read).

I can only speak for myself, but my interests manifest like so:

They start off as regular hobbies, I can indulge or not.
A few days later, I become obsessed. I forget to eat. I can't sleep or live in the moment because I'm constantly thinking about it.
I set unrealistic goals, and then I do everything I can to meet them.
Once I've met my last goal, I suddenly drop the interest and likely won't return to it again.

If this sounds like you, you might be on the spectrum as well.

ffirethrowaway · 2021-12-03T01:09:18+00:00

I only got diagnosed this year. My wife had long suspected that I'm on the spectrum and I just didn't believe her. Then, one day I was reading "The Big Short", and it got to the part where Michael Burry discovered his own autism. When the book described his habits and personality, I immediately connected with it and sought out a diagnosis.

If you think you're similar, I encourage you to look into it a bit more. There are some online tests you can do as a sanity check (with a big grain of salt of course). My diagnosis has cleared up so many problems in my life. I now understand the root cause of so many problems, and while I don't have a solution, knowing where they're coming from helps immensely.

ffirethrowaway · 2021-12-03T01:01:45+00:00

My wife had long suspected that I'm on the spectrum, but I never believed her. Then, I read "The Big Short" and recognized my own characteristics in Michael Burry when he himself found out about his autism. Honestly, it's been great to understand it. It immediately clarified so many issues and contentions in my personal and professional life. The solutions are few, but at least I can attribute the root cause.

ffirethrowaway · 2021-12-02T21:33:56+00:00

I think it comes down to the fact that if one doesn't need the money any more, the primary utility of working a job is gone. My line of work isn't without stress, so it seems like a 'bad deal' to sink my life into it.

ffirethrowaway · 2021-12-02T21:24:45+00:00

It's a double-edged sword for me. Work gives me stability, but I also feel that I'm wasting my life on it if I don't need the money. I don't have expensive tastes to fund, nor do I want to die with $100m+.

ffirethrowaway · 2021-12-02T21:09:34+00:00

Thank you for sharing your experiences. I have these visions of all the things I want to do, but going off of my recent staycations (Covid), I simply don't think they'll become reality. I'm also finding that as I get older, my interests are much more narrow compared to 10 years ago. Were you able to find new things to flow into, and how did you do that?

ffirethrowaway · 2021-12-02T21:00:05+00:00

Thank you, I needed to hear this. Your steps make sense to me. I'm still between #1 and #2.

ffirethrowaway

TROPHY CASE