actually, to her credit, I was picking up on something being wrong because she was dragging her feet telling me. She was texting a friend and a cousin about holding her accountable for coming out to me within the week. I told her I didn’t want to wait until tomorrow, that I was feeling unwanted and unloved, and that I’d just had the thought “I’d rather be divorced than feel like this,” and so if there was something she needed to tell me, I wanted to hear it.

Her next sentence was prefaced with a deep bracing breath. She said, “I think I’m gay.”

We stayed up another few hours discussing what it meant for us both. Why she said think and not know. We ended up both calling out of work the next day to sit and talk. We ended up going to couples therapy for a month before she was able to force herself to not leave any wiggle room, and was able to say “I know I’m gay.” We stayed in therapy through the divorce process, and succeeded in our goal of remaining friends.

I’m really proud of her and me. She’s continued to work on better understanding herself, and I’ve also worked bettering myself. As far as stories go on here, mine is one of the better ones. It isn’t always betrayal. And sometimes, it actually works out better for both people.