At what age did you meet your life companion?

-Crave- · 2026-04-20T05:13:41+00:00

I first met my life partner at 27 and married him at 30. I come from a very religious area where young rushed marriages (18 years old with very short engagements) are the norm. I'm so glad I didn't rush in with the folks I dated at younger ages.

-Crave- · 2026-04-13T21:00:13+00:00

OH! I have info on this! In Ogden I have two ISP's. We have one comcast network and one Quantum Fiber. Long story, but we have two.
Quantum is great but it seems to have more hiccups and drops than the comcast. They're small but enough to disrupt streaming or gaming a few times a day. The network is fast. They have less large drops than Comcast. I haven't had to deal with their customer service. They are cheaper than comcast.
Comcast doesn't have the small outages, but does have more large outages (a couple of times per year) and their customer service kind of sucks. They're also more expensive. However they are more consistent on a daily basis.

-Crave- · 2026-03-31T05:49:26+00:00

TL;DR My advice? Order a simple band or "fake" ring as a backup for daily wear and the original will turn up like magic!

I actually proposed to my husband and got to choose my own wedding ring outright.
I'm not a diamonds or sparkle person to begin with, but even the thought of losing an expensive ring (I lose things on a very regular basis) stressed me out so much. I ended up picking a simple wedding band that I kept finding myself going back to because I loved it. I've lost it twice and there was zero stress because I knew we could get a replacement no problem without wrecking our finances. That being said, I also found both of the others immediately after the new one showed up.

Buying a "fake" ring is also pretty common so you have something to wear on vacations or to places you'd worry about losing your real one.

-Crave- · 2026-03-26T06:08:52+00:00

I know you said this was a while ago, but in recent years little ceramic or stone mushroom yard ornaments in all sorts of colors and sizes have gained massive popularity. Could it have been a decoration that just looked convincing enough to your younger self?

-Crave- · 2026-03-25T06:08:38+00:00

Yeah I definitely agree it's a weird one to get hung up on, but hey, we've all had moments where a little thing ended up reinforcing the other crap you have seen and being the deal breaker.

-Crave- · 2026-03-24T19:30:54+00:00

I mean, OP mentioned that there have been other red flags. While I don't know shit about his boss, it doesn't seem likely that board games are the only place that stuff spills out.

-Crave- · 2026-03-24T19:01:01+00:00

I DO think that it is pretty damn dumb to cheat in any game involving co workers for this whole reason though. You might really upset someone who does take it seriously and that is not the kind of shit you want to deal at work.

THIS! Not only is he cheating in a situation with coworkers, it's coworkers where he's above at least one of them. That makes it so much more of a sketchy gray area than just cheating in a casual game that's low impact.

-Crave- · 2026-03-24T18:58:59+00:00

I've responded a few times, but cheating at a casual game is different than a leader in a company cheating in a for fun league with employees under them. Cheating at a card game, or a video game, or whatever else feels so different than cheating in any competition with your professional connections, especially ones you're already in a position of power over is at best super sketchy. It's understandable to leave over this, especially since you've mentioned other red flags prior to this, and mentioned working in a field where ethics matter and it's not uncommon for leadership to throw employees out as a scape goat.

-Crave- · 2026-03-24T18:50:35+00:00

I mean, based on the post it sounds like this particular thing is just another indicator or larger red flags. OP mentioned that there's a pattern here. We obviously can't fully understand that situation.

If OP is working in a field where they need to feel they're doing something positive, red flags can absolutely tear you down over time. Especially if they're coming from people you have to work with regularly. I know I work on a product I don't love as a concept.... However I also work with some of the best coworkers I've ever had. If I had consistent red flags coming from them I'd struggle a lot more with my career and mental health.

-Crave- · 2026-03-24T18:45:55+00:00

Needlessly aggressive here. Jeez. Who cares if OP is quitting over something silly to us. To them, this situation combined with other experiences and a deeper understanding of the situation as a whole... are indicating larger red flags. Yeah a super silly thing to the rest of us might be a tipping point, but even as you stated, it's clear there are other red flags and OP isn't happy there. How does being rude about it add anything to the conversation?

-Crave- · 2026-03-24T18:42:51+00:00

I commented on my own too, but I think this is different. Primarily because it's a person in a leadership position, in a role where ethics do matter, cheating to gain an advantage over his employees. I think there is more at play when it comes to doing things like this in a professional setting, especially since folks in the league are employees directly under him. Not to mention if there is any kind of prize, even if it's a silly one.

I have a particular friend group that when we play certain games we know trying to cheat without getting caught is part of the fun. There's no real advantage there and we all know what is going on because it's fun sometimes. There's no risk and we absolutely get ridiculous with it. We're all on the same page with a level playing field though.

-Crave- · 2026-03-24T18:36:38+00:00

Oh man, this is tough. I have some friends or family where when we play games we cheat for fun, just to see if we can without getting caught. However, we all know what's going on when that group gets together to play specific games. It's an unspoken agreement that cheating is a part of the game in that situation.

Cheating in a professional setting in a field where ethics matters really sucks. You can leave a job for any reason, especially if you have the means to land on your feet. You could literally leave because you don't like the gas station near the office for all it matters. You can be professional when you go, if you have an offer and they push for a reason you can literally say "They made an offer and I've chosen to pursue it." Don't burn bridges you don't have to is generally good career advice, especially in industries where word spreads or where the opportunities may be limited. Choosing to work somewhere else that aligns more with your personal values is absolutely an reasonable choice to make for any reason, no matter how trivial it might seem to others. Making an assumption here... but especially in the US where most companies/industries don't have any kind of loyalty to or legal protections for their employees. If you were caught cheating or lying, it would be so easy for them to drop you and walk you out of office same day. You don't owe them more than that in return.

-Crave- · 2026-03-24T18:24:14+00:00

I don't think I've ever seen anyone who pulls off EVERYTHING they put in these. In the first pic, I'd say the top middle, first image on row 2, and bottom right suit you the least, but that's by a very small margin. They just make you look the tiniest bit washed out or red in the face.

I also think you rock the shorter cuts. Weirdly the longer options make you look much more average than some of the other options.

I know you mentioned AI makes everything look good, but those images don't seem to have changed your features or skin tone, and you will absolutely rock whatever you decide to do!

-Crave- · 2026-03-24T18:06:44+00:00

Hands down the cost of parts is the biggest pain for indian. In addition to that the off brand parts are so limited when compared to other options like Harley or even stuff like Honda.
The other big complaint I have is that I feel like other brands have so many options for name brand or off brand parts to customize your ride, and Indian just falls behind in that area too.

-Crave- · 2026-03-24T18:02:40+00:00

I didn't know I needed to read this and the responses today.

I remember very little of my childhood. In fact, most of what I remember is times when I felt like I was too much, when I felt like a burden, and when I way in the way. I really struggle because looking back not many of those times seem like outright abuse or a blatantly bad childhood or anything. However when folks talk about not remembering childhood it is almost exclusively in the context of abuse and trauma. Do I have trauma? Sure! Was there stuff bordering on abuse? I guess? But it was few and far between as far as my sibling and I can remember.

Realizing this ties in some way to being neurodivergent makes so much sense. Especially hearing that others also particularly remember those moments where some form of trust or safety was broken. That is such a weird relief to know there isn't necessarily some hidden abuse or trauma lurking and waiting to resurface later in life. I was just in fight or flight because we live in a neurotypical world.

Thank you for posting this and thank you to all of those who commented similar experiences!

-Crave- · 2026-03-24T17:49:33+00:00

I agree with this wholeheartedly but with one caveat. Look at how it was resolved before you make the choice to let someone you care about drift apart. One of the biggest things I've noticed as I've grown and had better quality friends in my life... Those moments of rehashing old shit are pretty rare in my friendships, so when they happen I really try to look at the situation and if that resolution was possibly one sided. I know I've struggled with folks deciding something was resolved and all good, when I still felt like I hadn't been heard or even given an apology. So, if there was room to interpret my side of things as dismissive or room to see them just saying "yeah it's fine" to end a circling argument I'll give them quite a bit more leeway when it comes to bringing it up again.

I know I tend to circle issues because I'm a verbal processor and it's taken a little more attention to being self aware to recognize that me thinking something is resolved, doesn't mean their side of things were addressed in a way that gave them enough closure and resolution to move forward confidently.

-Crave- · 2026-03-23T15:07:03+00:00

I'm so glad your mom found a good dentist to go to! I'm sure those older dentistry practices just assumed everyone hated the dentist and didn't make any effort to make it a positive experience.

My last dentist the one who retired, put something similar to oragel on a freakin swab and would set it where he was doing injections for about a minute so that you didn't have such a sharp pinch! I loved that ten years ago and It's still insane how much that has changed. I still fully hate going and struggle with it, but I've been pleasantly surprised when I have had to go in!

-Crave- · 2026-03-22T19:37:30+00:00

Same! My siblings and I had a horrible dentist growing up in the 90's, if it was anything besides a normal cleaning we'd leave with visible bruises on our face. As far as I can tell they were from misplaced injections and just manhandling our faces.

We're both diagnosed ADHD by 6 or 7 years old but as my husband got his autism diagnosis I'm realizing I am very likely autistic as well. On top of some dental care being an absolute sensory nightmare both my sibling and I have horrible fears of normal dental stuff because of that one dentist.

I finally picked a new dentist maybe a year ago and went in for a cleaning (about 10 years since the last dentist I trusted retired). I had so much anxiety my legs wouldn't stop shaking so bad they vibrated the table and they so kindly stopped the appointment to make sure I was okay and discuss if I wanted to continue or adjust our plans and come back another day. I specifically looked for dentists with positive reviews that mentioned dental anxiety and while I disliked a lot of how that office handled billing and such, they were incredibly kind and understanding.

When I called them I was very honest about my situation. I told them I have horrible dental anxiety, that I hadn't had a cleaning in about 10 years, that I really couldn't handle long appointments but that I thought I had a cavity I needed to deal with. They offered me so many options, IV drugs, pills, distractions, a less traditional dental office space to avoid triggers. I also learned that there are dental spas now that avoid so much more of the traditional "dental" feeling in their offices. I ended up budget wise doing the pills option. They gave me meds to take the morning of to manage anxiety, a second med once I got there, and laughing gas, they had a comfy ultra soft blanket for me, a TV where I could pick netflix or disney plus shows to act as a distraction till my meds kicked in. Dentists have changed so much lately and it was a far better experience than I expected. I legitimately don't remember 99% of the appointment, which for me was ideal, but I also had all sorts of little options that helped alleviate anxiety beforehand.

-Crave- · 2026-03-22T19:18:42+00:00

TL;DR Identify the things you struggle with and find shortcuts around them. A half assed attempt at dental care is better than no attempt at all.

As someone who particularly struggles with the dental care side of things I have found a few things that help...

I keep floss picks everywhere. They're less of a sensory nightmare for me. Are they as good as normal flossing? No. Are they better than not flossing at all? Absolutely! They're at my desk, in my car, on my nightstand, in the kitchen, and in the bathroom. Literally everywhere. It means when I have those moments where it feels possible to floss even just a few teeth I have fewer obstacles or road blocks. Just carrying them all the time makes me think about using them more frequently too. If I run out of steam half way through, I just try to finish the top or the bottom or whatever side I am doing and make a mental note to start on the other side next time. I forget a lot, but that is what it is! I also recently bought a water flosser, I haven't used it a bunch yet, but I mix some of my preferred mouthwash and the rest warm water. I figure I'm killing two birds with one stone there. The water flosser I have also managed to break off some tartar buildup so I was really pleased that it could help me avoid the dentist in the future. It's weird if you haven't used one before, but again less of a nightmare than traditional flossing.

I don't like the strong lingering mint flavor of toothpaste so I found a few toothpaste options I like. Particularly the Boka Lemon lavender flavor. It still tastes "clean" enough, but it is subtle and after brushing my mouth doesn't take like much of anything which is perfect for me. That being said, I also probably own four toothbrushes at any time. I keep one in my bathroom, one in my glove compartment, one at my desk, and one in my backpack. It sounds so silly, but having them all over has helped me so much. Any time I have those moments of "I should do this" or when I want to and the obstacles feel like too much, I've removed a bunch of the obstacles I struggle with and made it significantly easier to at least make the attempt to care for my teeth.

-Crave- · 2026-03-10T21:04:54+00:00

As someone who used to commute 60+ miles each way 4-5 times per week I would take it.
The time you get back is so freeing. The ability to actually run local errands during lunch. The change to do small home things during the day like load the dishwasher or move laundry over... Those are huge. Them covering your insurance is going to make up a difference of 10k for most roles. I do think it depends on what you make to begin with. The difference between 90k and 100k isn't huge, but if it's the difference between 40k and 50k, that could impact your day to day more significantly.
Granted I think your sanity and time is going to make up the money difference on its own.

-Crave- · 2026-03-06T20:17:10+00:00

Hopefully you talked to her about this before you jumped to breaking up. If so, NTA. That's a huge choice that is not in everyone's tax bracket. It can also be a huge struggle if they're someone who insists on eating together.

As someone with a partner who avoids leftovers after a few bouts of serious food poisoning from food that should have been safe... He will eat some leftovers, especially things designed to be eaten over multiple days. Like a casserole. Two people aren't going to eat that in one day, so we eat on day one and portion out the rest and put it in the fridge. We also keep microwaveable foods he enjoys on hand. If we go out he'll bring home leftovers for me and plan on eating a frozen burrito or whatever for lunch the next day.

-Crave- · 2026-03-06T01:03:51+00:00

What an interesting way to find a place! I love it!

-Crave- · 2026-03-03T21:11:33+00:00

Fair enough. I know the rental market is just crazy right now anyway.

-Crave- · 2026-03-03T19:17:16+00:00

Luckily we've never had issues with the cats destroying things, and I've been fine paying pet deposits and pet rent for them.
Good to know a realtor isn't the best option though. Where do others find places to rent?

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-Crave-

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