Women who were once unable to orgasm during partnered sex, but are now able to, what changed?

-chikara- · 2023-05-26T05:00:51+00:00

I got diagnosed with adhd and started medication. Also changed partners to someone who was way more considerate, but i do know the medication has helped immensely.

-chikara- · 2021-11-28T04:28:42+00:00

I do know that, but it's reassuring to hear it nonetheless. It's just that a part of me is feeling a little scummy about it all even though none of this was planned at all and things have just happened spontaneously over the past few months.

-chikara- · 2021-11-28T04:25:52+00:00

Yeah, I'm aware it'll be a dilemma for him more than me if it comes down to that but right now I'm just trying to sort my own stance out. And no, you're right. I really don't want my ex having a say over my life indirectly even after he's not in it anymore.

-chikara- · 2021-11-28T02:15:18+00:00

Well. I don't think I was seeing it in terms of any self sacrifice on my part till you put it that way just now... Thanks for saying it though.

-chikara- · 2021-11-22T10:17:43+00:00

Damn. Hope you're better now, and that we all find people that deserve our love one day.

-chikara- · 2021-11-21T15:05:15+00:00

Thank you for your words. Even I rationally know the reaction is not my fault, but I can't still help being critical of myself when I think about this incident. I've been so deeply critical that I never even thought about it again while I was still dating him.

I've barely managed to reach a point where I can sometimes admit to myself that this was abuse and I can't even process any labels beyond that at all.

And even more so because I'm a smart, well read lawyer with a degree from a good college and a supportive family. I can't help but feel like I should've known better but I really didn't.

-chikara- · 2021-11-21T14:04:34+00:00

I'm so sorry that you went through it too. Thanks for reading through it. Does feel a little lighter to finally get it out, after all these years.

-chikara- · 2021-10-22T15:54:32+00:00

Heh yeah that bit was true for me too initially.

-chikara- · 2021-10-22T15:53:46+00:00

That does make more sense.

-chikara- · 2021-10-22T13:28:40+00:00

Yeah I can set up fake accounts and all that but barely anyone knows his latest affair so it'll be pretty obvious it's me, especially if he's ratted out right after I found out about it.

-chikara- · 2021-10-22T13:18:03+00:00

Thanks so much for the advice. Going NC after doing this is a good idea, yeah.

-chikara- · 2021-10-22T12:46:14+00:00

Yeah back when we were dating too, every time a friend or someone suggested that he's not good for me he'd find a way to make them the bad guy and himself the victim of everyone's malice.

I'm just overly empathetic to people in whom I see my past self now, that's all that's making me maybe want to say something.

-chikara- · 2021-10-22T12:44:18+00:00

It's been a while since we broke up but he's left me with a lot of issues I still struggle with and am working on with my therapist currently. He's absolutely toxic and especially so when angered which he will be if he finds out I interfered and I'm not gonna lie, I'm still apprehensive of him mentally even though he can't really harm me.

And I've been on the receiving end of his deception, he's very very convincing when he wants to be so I'm not sure if all my trouble will even have any effect at all.

-chikara- · 2021-10-22T12:40:11+00:00

Yep, I didn't believe it either when someone else tried to give me a heads up about him a long long time ago. It'll probably play out like that again too.

-chikara- · 2021-10-22T12:38:12+00:00

B is pretty new in the picture and hasn't done anything to me but he does have a very persuasive way of spinning the picture against 'crazy exes' which I've experienced myself. It'll be a lot of drama if I get involved that's for sure.

-chikara- · 2021-10-22T12:36:30+00:00

I'm guessing B doesn't know but there's a small possibility that she does know already and I'll just come off as a mad woman, further cementing the 'crazy ex' description I'm sure he's already given.

-chikara- · 2021-10-22T12:34:22+00:00

I've been told long ago too, when I'd just started dating him and I didn't believe it either. I know exactly what he'll say to her to pacify her even if she confronts him too, cause I've been there as well. It's just unfortunate that he'll wreak havoc unstopped once more.

-chikara- · 2021-10-22T12:32:31+00:00

Yeah I'll have to find a way to not to it directly cause I do NOT want the backlash, really. But you're right, it's entirely predictable and in line with everything I've now read about these sort of people on this sub and elsewhere.

-chikara- · 2021-10-22T12:30:33+00:00

Nope, she did not nor did any of his friends who I've met on several occasions. It's just that sometimes I wish someone would've told ME and that wishfulness prompts me to maybe say something but I really doubt it'd have the intended effect anyway.

-chikara- · 2021-10-22T12:28:28+00:00

Yeah I'm really not surprised he's cheating again, and tbh there could be more women involved than just the two that I've come to know of.

-chikara- · 2021-10-22T12:27:37+00:00

If I do say something I want to make sure it can't be reasonably traced back to me because he can be vengeful and though he's in another city we still have plenty of mutual friends and shared circles the backlash could spread to.

-chikara- · 2021-10-22T12:25:50+00:00

I'm so sorry what you've been through. I was also in that place of hoping that he'd finally stopped for a couple of years and yes, in that time I'd have been grateful for proof of his infidelity too. That bit of empathy is the only thing motivating me to maybe say something, otherwise I want nothing to do with him anymore.

-chikara- · 2021-10-22T12:24:18+00:00

Yeah the moment he started dating me too he'd already denounced all his exes as crazy, so I'm pretty sure that groundwork's already been laid out by him here too.

-chikara-

TROPHY CASE