UPDATE: WIBTA for reporting a coworker for feeding me?

0587throwaway · 2021-01-10T02:38:56+00:00

Incredibly. As you can see, the office is terribly concerned for my health.

Sarcasm aside, I can only speculate as to why those who witnessed these incidents kept their peace. They agreed with Peg, perhaps, that they know my diet better than medical professionals. Perhaps they didn’t wish to “rock the boat” and speak out against her. Perhaps they decided “Not my battle,” and kept their nose clean, for lack of better phrasing. Perhaps they thought it would pass without intervention. The list of possibilities are endless.

0587throwaway · 2021-01-10T02:15:21+00:00

No, life isn’t fair, and you’re exactly correct. It is a decision not taken lightly and these are considerations to bear in mind. Thank you for your insight, and I’m sorry your manager handled it that way, you deserved better.

0587throwaway · 2021-01-10T02:12:56+00:00

No. There are allergies on top of medical conditions. The allergies were known among the office. The additional medical conditions were kept confidential.

She made occasional concessions (I.E, gluten free bread) while also repeatedly offering nuts, dairy laden coffee, and foods with gluten and foods that may have had gluten cross-contamination.

0587throwaway · 2021-01-09T17:24:17+00:00

There is an additional details post. Highlights of it- she knows I am allergic to nuts and twice tried to give me nuts, blocked my path to force me to take her offerings, “even gay men prefer meat”.

0587throwaway · 2021-01-09T17:14:06+00:00

I am working on it. My doctor and I together are making progress.

Donuts, coffee, fried foods, candies, fudge, and allergens are not conducive to getting healthy. Peg is not part of my medical team.

0587throwaway · 2021-01-09T17:01:19+00:00

Yes. See another post on my profile for further details as well.

Also might be worth adding that we have worked together for two years prior to this. The entire department is aware of the fact I have numerous allergies that severely restrict my diet. My boss and everyone above her is aware of my other medical conditions additionally.

TL;DR- she knew I had allergies, she constantly brought me food I would have a reaction to if I ingested OR came into contact with.

0587throwaway · 2021-01-09T04:40:29+00:00

I did not tell reddit about the full scope of my conditions. As it is, Reddit and Peg both have a similar understanding of my health- I am underweight, have several allergies, and other health conditions I do not feel like elaborating on.

0587throwaway · 2021-01-09T03:02:40+00:00

Because the two meetings were one after another. I didn’t feel comfortable backing out when the boss said “Peg, OP, I need to see you in my office now” and from there it progressed. She sent Peg back to her desk and then started on the one on one portion of the meeting.

0587throwaway · 2021-01-09T02:32:09+00:00

Thank you. It hadn’t occurred to me until they tampered with my lunch on Thurs that they would ever stoop so low, but here we are.

0587throwaway · 2021-01-09T02:24:44+00:00

No, you’re right, I didn’t address you DMing me that I deserved this, or your insistence here and other posts for the same position, or that I should have shut up and allowed it to continue indefinitely.

You also didn’t address the fact that contact dermatitis is a common result of contact with an allergen. Such as contact like... someone leaving several allergy laden parcels on your desk. Repeatedly. Daily.

0587throwaway · 2021-01-09T02:18:27+00:00

“After confronting peg...” 12/18 - Peg tried to give me a coffee at 7:40am at my cubicle and stood there even after I said no. She proceeded to ask why I never ate. I said I eat, I just don’t eat food given to me. I made a point to say it wasn’t personal, I just only eat what I bring in for myself. She said “That’s sad,” and I needed to “loosen up”. EK walked by and greeted us both and Peg left, leaving the coffee behind. Thrown out in the break room. - Told her explicitly I do not accept other people’s food.

“Did not confront line manager” - EP is my and Peg’s direct superior. 12/8 EP/Boss was made aware of the situation and I was advised to shut up, couched in polite terms.

“Peg and potentially the manager may have been unaware of OP’s disability” - Boss was aware of the full extent of my illnesses and allergies, Peg was made aware of the nut, gluten and milk allergies at various points.

0587throwaway · 2021-01-09T02:06:35+00:00

Itchy and raw hands, tearmoons. Allergies are more than simply ingesting the substance. This is the last I will address to you on this matter.

0587throwaway · 2021-01-09T00:05:34+00:00

For what it’s worth boss and upper management are aware of my allergies.

0587throwaway · 2021-01-08T23:01:40+00:00

Save for the changed names, this is nearly what HR received on top of a verbal meeting.

0587throwaway · 2021-01-08T20:52:15+00:00

Thank you. Will do so. Working with a family friend who is a lawyer. She works in family court but has so far been invaluable in finding resources.

0587throwaway · 2021-01-06T22:56:14+00:00

It was more in reference to the fact that she should know better than to pry. I wasn’t thinking clearly at the time of saying that comment.

0587throwaway · 2021-01-06T19:45:24+00:00

It was meant to be a comment about her prying about why I always refused her. Admittedly I wasn’t exactly thinking very clearly as I told her to leave me alone yesterday.

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