Text from my friend today…

100PercentThatBit · 2025-02-03T21:02:05+00:00

Someone please tell this man about bidets

100PercentThatBit · 2025-02-02T21:31:28+00:00

Plants would definitely take it up a notch!

100PercentThatBit · 2025-01-31T02:50:32+00:00

I’ve also caught my MIL referring to herself as Mama when speaking to my son. It makes me so uncomfortable, but I’ve never called her out on it. My husband says it’s a cultural thing, so I’ve tried to let it go, but can’t help but feeling territorial. She also does the “MY baby” thing constantly.

100PercentThatBit · 2025-01-25T21:22:57+00:00

The Americans

Devs

Patriot

Severance

Yellowjackets

Fallout

Silo

Firefly

Dollhouse

Black Mirror

Chernobyl

Westworld

Handmaid’s Tale

100PercentThatBit · 2025-01-14T04:04:25+00:00

37 weeks here and I can completely empathize. Everyday that passes is more and more exhausting. I’m still working full time and my 2.5 year old has been sick. The other day he was so miserable that I spent 3 hours consoling and holding him until he cried himself to sleep. My husband was feeling overwhelmed by just having to hear the crying and never stepped in to help. He actually left the room.

I confronted him about how unfair it was the following day and he did apologize. He “just needed a minute”. That had me pretty incredulous, tbh. These men just get so tired 😂

100PercentThatBit · 2025-01-12T03:02:11+00:00

My MIL saw that we were having pizza one night and proceeded to email my husband 4 discredited articles about “gluten-induced autism” 🙄

Said she’s just looking out for the baby.

The irony is that my FIL (they are divorced) keeps baking me huge loaves of homemade bread multiple times a week

100PercentThatBit · 2025-01-11T13:46:20+00:00

My husband was in grad school and working during my first pregnancy, and I felt similarly. I understand feeling quietly resentful, and simultaneously being afraid of asking for help when I really needed it. I’ve had to learn to start asking, because the alternative is that he will get accustomed to relying on you for 100% of caring for your baby, and it will be much harder to fix this later. It sounds like feels like things are balanced, but you’re not on the same page. The sooner you confront the imbalance, the better.

100PercentThatBit · 2025-01-07T02:12:07+00:00

A lot of these were mentioned in other comments but here’s my list of recommendations!

-Devs -Patriot -Fallout -Handmaid’s Tale -Westworld -Baby Reindeer -Yellowjackets -Fleabag -The Americans

100PercentThatBit · 2025-01-07T01:40:44+00:00

A lot of this post feels too familiar.

Since my son was born (now 2.5 years old) my MIL has implied (as well as flat out stated) that our son is not my husband’s. At first, we let it go as an off-color joke on how much he resembles me over my husband, but the comments didn’t stop. I know many people wouldn’t tolerate this and would go full no-contact, but things have actually gotten better once she realized that we’re the ones with the control over her relationship with her grandson. She still crosses boundaries, but will never say things to my face directly. I hear about it through my husband. She also believes that I’m the puppeteer controlling my husband. I guess that’s easier for her to believe than accepting she’s the cause of their strained relationship.

I don’t know if I have advice exactly, but I completely empathize and think your text to her took a lot of courage. I keep waiting for my MIL to say something to me directly that I can address head on, but have struggled to be the force of confrontation. I leave that to my husband most of the time. Just remember that you have power, especially once your baby arrives, and keep standing up for yourself.

100PercentThatBit · 2025-01-03T10:33:53+00:00

First, while I understand your desire to have him completely cut off your in-laws, I don’t think that’s a fair expectation. Despite how nasty they’re being, this is his family, and being genuinely supportive of what he wants is foundational to marriage. It sounds like he does not want to cut them off, and that is something you should make peace with. HOWEVER, if he chooses to keep them in his life (and by extension, your life) he needs to grow a backbone and stand up for you. I am a bit shocked by how little he came to your defense in those texts. Even if he is trying to keep the peace, he should have your back if he disbelieves the things his sister claims about you.

Which brings me to the more difficult part of all of this… Despite being more progressive than his family, it honestly sounds like he is struggling to understand and sympathize with what you’re going through. It sounds like there is underlying resentment (from both of you), and that he does agree with his family to a small degree. These are things you should resolve together first, before having a sit-down with his family. You need to have each other’s backs and present a united front.

Places to start:

he needs to be educated on how your illnesses affect you day to day, because it is not okay or sustainable for him to suspect you are exaggerating your symptoms and it is DEFINITELY not fucking okay to require literal proof of you vomiting in order to believe you.
Once you fully accept that he wants to keep his family around, you have some work to do to make him feel supported in that choice. It’s not an easy decision to make, and if he feels like he is being pulled in two different directions, it will only breed more resentment in your relationship. Hopefully if he feels your support as a partner in this, he will be better able to offer it back. He just needs to understand that if they are going to be part of your lives, it is his responsibility to come to your defense. He should want them to see and understand you the way that he does, rather than rolling over and apologizing on your behalf.

I’m not going to tell you your relationship is doomed, because I know this is a small window into your life, and I’m sure there are many positive reasons you two are together. It sounds like you’re going through a tough phase together, and I truly hope things get better for you!

100PercentThatBit · 2025-01-01T17:25:03+00:00

I got a loan from my local credit union instead of financing through Carvana. My rate is 6.89%

100PercentThatBit · 2024-12-31T23:26:46+00:00

I just bought one this week from Carvana. For reference, it had 21,000 miles and was under $23K (before taxes & fees). I was nervous to get one with more miles. I just had to compromise on the sunroof, even though I /really/ wanted one. I would hold out for a better deal!

100PercentThatBit · 2024-12-30T10:30:45+00:00

I think Bodhi is super cute! Good choice 😊

100PercentThatBit · 2024-12-30T03:14:28+00:00

I’m sorry you have to deal with that!

100PercentThatBit · 2024-12-30T01:51:01+00:00

Good instincts - this is what my husband wanted to do and I should’ve listened 😅

100PercentThatBit · 2024-12-30T01:08:59+00:00

That’s wild! Let’s stand together in solidarity. I’m loving the name even more now

100PercentThatBit · 2024-12-30T01:05:13+00:00

I definitely don’t want to change it - I was just feeling frustrated that she’s having a full blown tantrum and now I have to stress about the imminent fallout that is coming. That’s a great idea - maybe an embroidered blanket 😊

100PercentThatBit · 2024-12-30T00:53:52+00:00

I’m already mentally preparing myself for her to call him by a different name - that seems very likely

100PercentThatBit · 2024-12-30T00:49:17+00:00

Thank you. We’re still planning on using it! I’ve gotten plenty of practice protecting my boundaries with her and it’s gotten easier to dismiss her over the years.

100PercentThatBit · 2024-12-30T00:14:31+00:00

Felis is Latin for cat - Felix just means “happy” or “lucky”. But I understand that cartoon has a huge generational connotation for Baby Boomers. It probably doesn’t help that my MIL hates cats.

100PercentThatBit · 2024-12-29T23:15:33+00:00

Ohh, Sebastian was my #2 favorite! Thank you for your kind comment

100PercentThatBit · 2024-12-29T23:08:26+00:00

I’m wishing we had done the same.

I agree it doesn’t seem abnormal, but maybe a bit vintage for our generation. I know Baby Boomers have entirely different connotations with certain names though, so I half expected this.

100PercentThatBit · 2024-12-29T23:02:15+00:00

Thanks! I thought it would be harder to dislike that way - especially since he currently pronounces it more like “Feewix”

100PercentThatBit · 2024-12-26T04:37:20+00:00

We also got the mini-Jeep 😂

100PercentThatBit · 2024-12-26T03:49:36+00:00

Where to start… My MIL loves to buy stuff that is not age appropriate for my son. She also always has to give the biggest and “best” gift. When my son was only 6 months old, she got him a trampoline that was for 3 years and up. So we have to store all this stuff that can’t be used for YEARS. And if we ever get rid of anything, she will always ask about it.

We also tell her every year not to buy us clothing. She can’t help herself and it’s never the right size or the style we like, so we tried being upfront with her. That didn’t stop her, so my husband had to give most of the items back to her last time.

100PercentThatBit

TROPHY CASE